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Gf wants a 3some, but has self esteem issues. I am all for, but concerned she will have regrets
Her and I love each other unconditionally, but have self esteem issues. I think she's gorgeous, she thinks I'm hot; unfortunately, she thinks she's hideous and fat, I think I'm undesirable to say the least. We each think the other is too good for us, we each fear we are not enough for the other. She has slept with a number of people before me, and one each time we have broken up, which has been 5 break ups by my count, she has called herself a slut and whore on multiple occasions; I have slept with 2 people before her, 2 people after break ups, I consider myself well versed, but of too few partners to not be curious. We normally trust each other completely, but have had doubts, most recently because we each caught the other oggling someone else. She doesn't realize how much it hurts that she so openly oggles other men, encouraging me to undress them with my eyes as well; I avoid looking at women with desirable features, because I know it brings her to make comparisons and spiral to darker thoughts, but, in a need for honesty, I admitted to looking, that it was almost impossible to not look at her friends while we were swimming, mostly because my gf was making a scene of it right next to me fondling her friend, and things got to that dark spot again.
Still, she insists on a threesome, I love the idea in it's purest form, but shidder to think of the possible reprecussions given the self esteem issues, my own desire to bed another woman without having to leave this relationship or cheat, and the possibility of the third party bringing their own, unchecked but still aboard baggage that may swing things oddly.
To top things off, my gf admitted to me that on the same night as I admitted to having been admiring her friend's figure, she had crossed off the full on lesbian experience from her bucket list, something I wasn't sure was entirely without the intent of testing my composure. To clarify, I encourage her to follow her whims, so long as the long lasting effects will not adversely affect our relationship, ie, be sure you don't catch something, don't sleep with another guy, don't lead anyone on, the like. But, again, she told me this after having a conversation revolving around her being self conscious and me oggling the very friend she had just gone all the way with.
Sorryfor the novel, but, this threesome proposition has more baggage than I think my gf fully realizes is there, and I'm hoping that I can get honest opinions on the situation, rather than have hers fueled by needs to please me or mine fueled by less thinking rationally due to the gaga effect such a proposition can impose upon a young man that could easily have been off having a guilt free threesome had he gone off to college rather than staying safe in his home town for his generals, family, and high school sweetheart
- Asked by Male, 18-21