What should I do about my exclusive relationship with a woman who is still married?
We just recently had our 6 year anniversary, that was a non-event for her. We have been 'dating' exclusively for the last 6 years. During the beginning I was still married, now she is still married to her husband who is in prison.
We both have one child under the age of 15, and one child over the age of 20. We do not live together, and neither of us would live in the other's current house. Mine is too small, and hers is too large as well as being built by her and her current spouse.
She has filed for divorce, but her spouse who is in prison will not agree to any of the offers that have been provided.
She is currently running the business that she owns with her spouse, and has her youngest child with her 24/7. When she is not working, she also sometimes cares for her 3 grandchildren that her oldest son fathered.
I have shared custody of my youngest child, and have her at least two nights a week, as well as every other Fri/Sat/Sun.
All of our children know we are good friends, but aren't aware of our full relationship at least they have not confronted either of us about it.
On average we spend one evening a week with each other without any children around as a date night. We also have dinner together with the children at least one or two nights a week depending on if I have my daughter or not. On the weekends when I don't have my daughter, we will usually have one other date night.
On other nights when I don't have my daughter, she is usually too tired from working to come over to my house, or wants to stay at home with her youngest son (14). Her youngest son is not very social, and tends to mostly spend his time downstairs in his room.
I don't feel 1 - 2 nights a week alone is enough intimate time for me, but that is generally what she tends to give me as she believes she needs to spend time with her son.
This year alone she has taken him on two trips to Las Vegas, as well as on a cruise in the Caribbean. I wasn't invited to go on either of these trips and she planned them without discussing them with me first.
I am in my mid 40's, and I feel I am at the crossroads of this relationship and need to decide which way to go. I have invested 6 years of my life which I feel is a fair amount at my age. I am told I am an attractive man, and that I have a lot to offer.
What do I do?
- Asked by Male, 36-45