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Why are guys so scared of love? Als...
11:17 PM - Sunday April 11, 2004

Why are guys so scared of love?

Als...

Why are guys so scared of love?

Also why do guys break up with a girl and then want her back as soon as she finds sumone else?

Men are sooooo weird sumtimes.

- Asked by A Sweet Sarah, Female, 18-21, Washington, DC, Medical / Dental

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I'm afraid that I can't answer your second question, as I've never had the experience. However, I have put a lit of thought into your first question. To be glib about it, guys are scared of love because being in love STINKS. I can't figure out why girls AREN'T scared of it.

To elaborate, back before I was in love, I could go to a movie by myself and have a good time. Now, though, if I go to the movie, the experience feels hollow because I'm not sharing it with her. It's not enjoyable that I have to feel incomplete everytime that she's not around.

Plus, let's face it, there's only one relationship in your life that is going to be happily ever after; all the rest will come to an end. Those ends hurt like heck, too.

So, basically, love is the process of making myself miserable and lonely when she's not around up until likely time that my heart is ripped out and sent through the shredder. I'm not supposed to be scared of this? Trust me, if I could get out of it, I would do so in a second.

- Response by ifics, A Mr. Nice Guy, Male, 22-25, Indianapolis, Student

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Heres my take on this question, take it for what its worth. Maybe the girl was giving too much in the relationship and made things too easy for the guy. He breaks up with her then when she finds someone else, he realizes he can't have her anymore because she is with someone else. People always want what they can't have. Play hard to get and your more likely to keep the guy interested in you longer.

- Response by Pearles, A Guy Critical, Male, 26-28, Minneapolis

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Some guys are scared of love. Men are taught to be men, conditioned, since we're born. A lot of men see love and opening up to someone as being vulnerable and putting yourself out on a limb. Men don't like to be vulnerable and have their heart in someone else's hands. Not all men are like this. And it's human nature that men want what they can't have. Sometimes they'll break up with a women because of this insecurity, and then when another man is with her realize maybe it was a stupid move, but now they can't have her. Men are weird, I agree lol.

Best of Luck

-Peter

- Response by petiepal, An Intellectual Guy, Male, 29-35, Newark, Science / Engineering

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MEN are not scared of love and they do not break up with girls, then try to get them back. Immature boys do that. The problem is not men, it is the quality of boys you are dating. At your age, most boys do not want a long term relationship. They just want to have fun. If you want something different, you will probably need to be patient, or to date older men. Youth tend to be very jealous, which is also a sign of immaturity. The ego is a fragile thing. People feel very threatened by rejection and competition in the love department.

- Response by greekattorney, An Intellectual Guy, Male, 36-45, Political / Government

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We're not scared of love, its the fear of being burned. And the last part is jealousy. There is something that intrigues us about wanting something we can't have.

- Response by cubdude, A Mr. Nice Guy, Male, 26-28, Other Profession

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Fortuantely for you there is hope, since not ALL guys are affraid of love. When you have the opportunity to date a man who respects himself, women and life. A man who knows what he wants out of life and how to get it, as well as a man who appreciates a good woman. Then you will stop running into those types who are mainley affraid of love, because they are busy wandering if the next girl is going to be better than the last one, scared of not having total control...It's a long list.
The only reason he wants you back after treating you like already chewed bubble gum, is because his week insecurities are telling him that perhaps you are the next best thing if someone else can be happy with you, and share time with you, that somehow he is seemingly entittled to.
Don't fall for that.

- Response by realman2000, An Intellectual Guy, Male, 29-35, Norfolk, Medical / Dental

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Women are weird, too. Guys are just more blatant about it.

To answer your question, it's a territorial thing. You were "his" and now someone else is moving on their territory. It's BS, I know.. real men realize it and stop doing as they get older.

- Response by Spiritdaze, An Intellectual Guy, Male, 36-45, Oklahoma City, Technical

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A lot of men are scared because they have been hurt by it before. I am one of those guys so don't think that we are just incondsiderate. There's more to being a guy then girls realize just like there's more to u then we realize.

- Response by spartacus502, A Life of the Party, Male, 22-25, Detroit, Technical

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haha the question of the century. i wish i knew. i wouldn't be single if i did.

- Response by aespaceman, An Intellectual Guy, Male, 18-21, San Jose, Student

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