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Question about Thanksgiving guest etiquette
Friendship / 3:04 PM - Sunday October 21, 2012

Question about Thanksgiving guest etiquette

I'm going to the US for the first time this November and staying with friends, we've been invited to her aunties house for Thanksgiving.

Obviously this will be my first Thanksgiving, and I want to be a good guest. Is Thanksgiving like a mini-Christmas, should I buy gifts? Or just take a gift for the hosts? If so, what? Wine? Flowers? Chocolate? Or something else entirely? Is it the done thing to take a dessert or something, or would that be like implying they don't provide enough food for the guests or something?

Thank you in advance. I know it might sound like I'm anxious about this, but I'm not, i'm really excited!

- Asked by loulou444, An Alternative Girl, Female, 36-45, Financial / Banking

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It's not Christmas, no gifts are exchanged. It's a large family oriented meal where people express their gratitude for the blessings in their life and enjoy each other and traditional foods like turkey, stuffing, cranberry sauce, etc.

In the past, when I have gone to other peoples' Thanksgiving dinners, I have asked if I can bring a dessert or side dish. Usually the hostess will say "It's not necessary, but if you like, we could always use more X", and I'll take a long a home-made pie or some store bought rolls, etc.

BTW, it is always appropriate to bring a small "hostess" gift the first time you are invited to dinner at someone's house. My husband and I tend not to bring wine (because some people don't drink and we are not sure what they are serving for dinner) but flowers or chocolates are always appreciated. :) So if the hostess doesn't mention anything she needs, and you take those, I am sure you will be seen as gracious.

- Response by curvysmartgirl, A Creative, Female, 46-55, Dallas, Artist / Musician / Writer

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Thanksgiving is historically about bringing people and their food together, so I don't think it's too out of place to bring something edible or drinkable. Every family celebrates Thanksgiving a little differently though, so double check with your host about how you can contribute. The holiday symbolizes being helpful and appreciative - your attitude no matter what you bring is already appropriate.

And as far as I know, nobody exchanges gifts like in Christmas. If your friends family is, then they're weird.

- Response by ddegon, A Married Girl, Female, 29-35, Washington, DC

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Only for the host and a nice centerpiece for the table would be great.

- Response by kismet331, A Thinker, Female, 36-45

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Cook a dish.......

- Response by unbreakablesilence, A Married Girl, Female, 29-35, Medical / Dental

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Chocolate will be better...

- Response by A Thinker, Female, 36-45, Transportation

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Chocolate will be better...

- Response by A Thinker, Female, 36-45, Transportation

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Treat it like a dinner party and ask what you should bring. Usually a nice bottle of wine is just the ticket you want.

- Response by 7zebras, A Career Man, Male, 36-45, New York, Financial / Banking

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Just a hostess gift. You might ask "can I bring something?" for some guidance. Otherwise wine is always a good choice. Often, I'll ask guest to bring their favorite side dish, but since you're traveling.... If sobriety is an issue, then you can just bring fun nonalcoholic drinks like Martinelli's.

good luck and God bless

- Response by kravjar666, A Father Figure, Male, 46-55, Los Angeles, Consulting

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Chocolate will be better...

- Response by A Thinker, Female, 36-45, Transportation

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