Back to Home

Active Questions

What's the biggest acceptable age gap within a couple?
Dating / 6:12 AM - Sunday February 05, 2012

What's the biggest acceptable age gap within a couple?

I'm asking because I'm part of a swimming team and I'm by far the oldest of it. The 2nd oldest is about 4 years younger than me. I've made friends with pretty much everyone, but I've been wondering for some time now if it is right to try to establish a relationship with one of the girls considering they're the people who I spend the most time with other than my parents... Let's see... I'm currently 22, she's currently 17... we have a 5 year, 2 month and 9 day age gap between us... she's turning 18 in about 3 months, although I'm turning 23 before her birthday... So yeah, my biggest concern is to be seen as a paedophile over a possible "crush" with an under-age girl... Advice please? Thank you.

- Asked by An Intellectual Guy, Male, 22-25, Student

Read more about the Rating System


ANY.

Who has the right to put a number on it if two people are truly in love and want to be together.........

- Response by rafiki910, A Mr. Nice Guy, Male, Who Cares?, Boston, Body Work

Rating Received:


I would say four or five years. I think as long as you were in high school or college around the same time I think it's okay. it's weird seeing couples like ten years apart. but if your happy, do what you gotta do:)

- Response by raechayvoliebal06, A Trendsetter, Female, Who Cares?, Fitness

Rating Received:


I think it all depends on the age of the couple. When one is a young adult, as you are and one is underage .. that can be difficult .. legally and otherwise. I would wonder how much a 17 year old and a 22 year old would actually have in common long term.

People change and grow all the time. The younger one person is .. the more likely the person they "want" in the beginning of the relationship .. will probably be quite different than what they'd want in a few years or sooner.

I know you can't help who you become attracted too all the time .. but steering away from minors when you're an adult is probably a better idea for everyone.



- Response by mrscleaver16, A Married Girl, Female, 56-65

Rating Received:


I think it's smart to wait until she's 18, no matter what the laws where you are say. It's just a few months away! A fun rule to play with to find out what the youngest age you can date is to divide your age in half and add 7. You are 22... 18 is the youngest age you should date. It's not a "real" rule, just a fun guide. I dated a 21 year old when I was 17. I didn't think much of it, but my parents hated it (so I lied to them), and it was really awkward for him (he lied told all his friends/family I was 18, and hanging out with my high school friends was just odd for a 21 year-old). Take the next few months while you wait for her to turn 18 and get to know her, figure out how you really feel about her, and if she's worth the trouble.

- Response by fergie, A Hippie Chick, Female, 22-25, New York, Science / Engineering

Rating Received:


I hate how people always equate "dating" and "sex". I dated a 17-year old girl when I was twenty; we didn't have sex. You can date this girl unless her parents throw a fit... or she herself declines.

There's an ancient muslim tradition that says a man should choose a mate who is half his age, plus seven. For you, that means she should be 18, which she will be soon.

- Response by chesterdad, An Intellectual Guy, Male, 56-65, San Francisco

Rating Received:


Spend this time getting to know her and wait for 3 months until she turns 18. Age of consent, from what I have heard, is only if parents are ok. Once she's 18, she'll be legal in all respects as long as you don't get caught drinking with her or buying her alcohol.

- Response by lovemyhusband99, A Cool Mom, Female, 22-25, Other Profession

Rating Received:


5 years younger/older than you would be okay.

- Response by forry28, A Guy Critical, Male, 29-35, Los Angeles, Food Service

Rating Received:


Age is just a number but please until she turns 18 before you do anything wish you luck to.

- Response by pawbuddys, A Thinker, Female, 46-55

Rating Received:


there is no limit, i think if two people are mature enough to know right and wrong and wanting a relationship with each other; why should the people looking in from the outside matter.



- Response by belf12, A Guy Critical, Male, Who Cares?, Other Profession

Rating Received:


You can be friends with her, but I would keep the dating out of the picture until she turns 18. Or if you do date, no sex until she's 18, that is, being that is the direction it takes.

- Response by msadvise, A Thinker, Female, 46-55, Transportation

Rating Received:


My advice? Don't pursue ANY girl under the age of 18. That could really, really backfire on you if things go sour. I also don't think anyone 21 or over should date anyone under that age. You can legally drink and go to bars...they can't and could get in a lot of trouble if caught drinking under the age. Totally different, of course, if you both don't drink.

- Response by nico76, A Creative, Female, 29-35, San Francisco, Who Cares?

Rating Received:


Wait until she is 18 and you should have no problem.

- Response by frenchkiss49, A Thinker, Female, 56-65, Tampa, Who Cares?

Rating Received:


once she turns 18 it will be ok..but at you guys age..what she wants right now may be differnt from what you want right now..

- Response by michellekia, A Thinker, Female, 29-35, St.Louis, Other Profession

Rating Received:


Well i'm 14 and dating someone who is 26. i don't think age should matter at all as long as the younger person is really mature. I'm mature.

- Response by A Life of the Party, Female, 18-21

Rating Received:


Consent laws or not..as long as she lives under her parents roof and if they do not approve of it then step back..Have Fun with the Team and the time you spend with them..She is young and so are you and a big romance does not need to be at this time..;.]

- Response by cjs1991, A Creative, Female, 36-45, Teaching

Rating Received: