Thank you for your many years of support. We want to share the news with you that after much consideration, will cease operations in its present format on October 15th. We appreciate your meaningful contributions over the years.
Back to Active Questions

Active Questions

I don't think things will ever get better, only worst.
Dating / 1:24 PM - Thursday January 19, 2012

I don't think things will ever get better, only worst.

I broke up with my first bf of 7 years 3 years ago. I was diagnosed to contract herpes from him. I am devastated. But a wonderful man came along and he didn't care bout my condition but it is a long distance relationship and it only lasted for 1.5 year. I am also diagnosed with hyperthyroidism which cause my emotion to sway from one extreme to the other. Later from the incident of herpes, I did a HPV test and I am tested positive. I didn't get the 2 serious ones which account for 70% of the cervical cancer but I contracted the high risk type.

I tried to gather myself. I tried to accept this life of loneliness knowing no one would accept me. I tried very hard to accept everything that has happened to me but my first bastard bf got married and doesn't give a damn about what happened. I don't mean to want a relationship with him but he is putting this other girl at risk. It's not my business
I know buy this feeling in me....

I got on a car accident and that's about it I could take. I cant handle anymore of these, I am tired of trying to feel ok and I am feeling this emptiness and hopelessness.
As dramatic as it sounds, I don't know how to live my life anymore. My career is going downhill and nobody cares to acknowledge me.
I just feel like nothing will get any better. The truth is nobody wants to live alone, I don't want to be angry all the time with w everything that has happened, i don't want to live like I have nothing good to offer to those around me and most importantly the person I cared, I don't want to feel like I have nothing to look forward to in life, I can't find my own happiness.

How will you live this life?

- Asked by Female, 29-35

Read more about the Rating System

You're going through a depression. It is understandable because of everything that has come at you. There can be happiness for you, you just have to come to terms with these things and treat them. Trust me, you don't want the dirtbag back who gave you herpes. Chances are his new girl has already caught it and he's probably spread it to others as well because he doesn't care. He just sounds like a want only because you know he has herpes too and gave it to you and the shame you feel over it makes you uneasy about new relationships. Second HPV is very common and most who have it don't even know for a long time. It carries more risk for you than partners you have unless you have actual warts. Talking more to your gynecologist could help ease your mind as these things are more common than you think.

As for the hyperthyroid, that is treatable. You have different options on treating it. I had it what is called Graves Disease and while it does take awhile to figure out what the best treatment is for you, once you get your levels regulated life gets back to normal in that regard. Mine even affected how my eyes looked for awhile. I am now hypothyroid. It's just an ongoing health issue that doesn't have to be a big deal in the long run as long as you keep following up on it. In the beginning you have to go more frequently but once you find what works best for you, you will go less frequently. I would recommend you get a referral to a specialist to help in the beginning, an endocrinologist. good luck, things can get better you just have to start believing they will. If you get too depressed you should really talk to your Dr. about all your stress and how badly it is affecting you.

- Response by A Thinker, Female, 29-35

Rating Received:

No one wants to live alone? I live alone by choice and am extremely happy. I don't like people in my space. I have no advice for you because only you can change your life, if you think it is shitty then it is, if you think it is great then it is. "Looking for happiness within yourself is difficult, but looking for happiness elsewhere is impossible".

- Response by A Thinker, Female, Who Cares?

Rating Received:

Community Rating: Community Star

YOU, my little friend, are Textbook "Clinically Cepressed" and in DIRE need of medication.

See a psychiartrist ASAP!!!!

This isn't all YOU baby girl, a LOT OF THIS is a Chemical reaction in your brain.

Seriously. I'm not being funny. See a psychiatrist today and get some help for this MEDICAL PROBLEM you have.

- Response by hnygrl, A Career Woman, Female, 46-55, Managerial

Rating Received:

If you've lost everything, you have nothing else to lose and no where to go but up! Keep that in mind.

I'd start with a list. Lists are good. Lists are fun. Lists are made, and then forgotten. But you're not going to do that, right?

Start by creating a list of things that bug you the most in your life.
Create a second list of things you want to accomplish in life.

Take those lists and carry them in your purse. And look at them every day. If you're doing/dealing with something that's not on the list, you're wasting your life.

Copy and pasted from my best responses:

I came to accept the fact that God created someone for all of us, except God forgot about me when he created that plan. I realized I would die alone in my apartment, probably eating a microwave dinner over the sink and no one would notice until the smell of my rotting body crept out into the hallway. So, I said screw God and lived the way I wanted to. I stopped worrying about dating and relationships. I stopped wondering why I was single. I stopped caring about that stuff.

I started doing what I wanted to do, when I wanted to do it. I started being me, without any outside influence. Its amazing how much you can accomplish without worrying about being in a relationship. And I started being happy.

If you do this, you may never find a partner, but at least you'll be happy. There's no reason any of us need to be in a relationship in order to be considered "successful." Once you've accepted the fact you will be alone for the rest of your life, you're on the path.

With that said, I was happy. I was myself. I didn't need any woman to complete me. And thats when my true personality came out. And then I met her, when I least expected it. And I was just "me" without having to put on a fake face or attitude or worrying about making the relationship work because I didn't need to fake anything.

5 years and 2 kids later....

- Response by inotnuts, A Father Figure, Male, 36-45, Newark, Retired

Rating Received:

how would i live this life. I would try to focus one something positive even if its the fact that i still have breath and life. With every new day comes a new opportunity to make things right.

- Response by cocolover82, A Sweet Sarah, Female, 29-35

Rating Received:

No one wants to date a negative person. You need to to fix yourself emotionally and be content with being just you, getting your career back on track, etc before you even think about bringing someone else into your life.

- Response by A Career Woman, Female, 29-35

Rating Received: