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My boyfriend threatens to hit me but says its only a joke, what should i do ?
Dating / 9:12 PM - Friday October 14, 2011

My boyfriend threatens to hit me but says its only a joke, what should i do ?

My boyfriend would never hurt me, but when were talking sometimes he saws things like, "tell me to shh, again and ill punch you" just right out of the blue. I've told him many times to knock it off, but instead he uses my previous actions, sometimes they may be a justified example but most of the time its small stuff like i told him to shh, as an excuse to say "well i said that cause you told me to shh." I love him but this is very worrying what should i do

- Asked by lokipiko, A Sweet Sarah, Female, 22-25, Halifax

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If I was you I would be worried. Many things have been said in jest and turned out to be true.

For your sake I hope not.. Have a great night..

- Response by oldman52, A Mr. Nice Guy, Male, 56-65, Sydney, Retired

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Never say never! Threats of violence are just the prelude to the real thing. Next time he says that tell him if he does you'll call the cops. On top of that he is immature and tries to justify it by your shhhing him. Do you see the escalation here? You tell him to be quiet ... he says he'll hit you. Hopefully he doesn't drink because that could be the trigger set causes him to on day deliver on his promise. Hope I'm wrong. RfR

- Response by richfromringgold, An Intellectual Guy, Male, 46-55, Who Cares?

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Threatening words whether in joke or not are not appropriate talk between a man or woman or whom ever. I will give you this advice..be consistent in telling him that you would rather not be spoken in this manner and that it confuses you..You two should be having fun together not creating worry. Enjoy! ;.]

- Response by cjs1991, A Creative, Female, 46-55, Teaching

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this to me would be a red flag it always starts off as a threat and then become more i would be worried and i also would be breaking it off .

- Response by babygirl4all2no, An Alternative Girl, Female, 29-35, Who Cares?

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He is trying to control you by threatening you. This is worse than a stalker.

Honestly, one day I believe he will do it, it's just a matter of time. And honestly, I think your better off leaving. I have a friend who was just like you in this situation and now is stuck in a relationship because of violence and a fear to leave him. That's what it ends up being.

- Response by sunblaze, An Intellectual Guy, Male, 29-35, Artist / Musician / Writer

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Leave now. He IS threatening you and just prepping you for when he loses it and actually punches you....in his mind he feels you have been warned.

- Response by clip22, A Career Woman, Female, 36-45, Executive

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I agree with the others...definitely not something I would ever say to my girlfriend even as a joke. It's not funny to threaten any girl, especially your girl!
Obviously every possibility he's joking but it's a stupid joke.

- Response by schultzycharles92, A Mr. Nice Guy, Male, 22-25, London, Internet / New Media

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