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Sharing bed with boyfriend and son!
Sex & Intimacy / 11:22 PM - Sunday June 05, 2011

Sharing bed with boyfriend and son!

My boyfriend has joint custody of his 9 yr old son with his ex wife. When he has his son, the kid sleeps in the bed with BF. Apparently I'm expected to sleep in the bed with them, son on one side, BF in the middle, me on the other side. BF is latino-- is this normal in Latin culture? He doesn't seem to think it is odd at all. And is offended when I want to go home to sleep in my own bed. I would rather sleep on the floor or couch or air mattress instead, but that doesn't seem to be received well either. Help!

- Asked by Female, 36-45

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There might be something to your assertion of the latino culture finding this acceptable while the rest of us don't. My cousin is dating a mexican and he is very close to his family to the point where it cuases some conflicts with her and even beyond that I have heard of the closeness of latino families. And it does stand to reason that with many poor mexican families really overextending living arrangements in this country to survive that they would find this acceptable by neccessity and maybe even more so back in mexico since it is so poverty stricken. The bottum line is that you are uncomfortable with this as are most of us outside of the latino community, or I'll say potentially cuz I don't know that to be true. Whether he recieves it well or not you are not asking for something unreasonable to blow up an air mattress or even to have the kid sleep on the couch. My 15 year old niece spends alot of time with me but I'm a grown man so she doesnt' sleep in my bed and damn sure wouldn't sleep in my bed with a girlfriend. When she is over and there is no bed available she gets the couch or an air mattress and it is not a big deal. However no matter what handle this gingerly cuz you don't want to make the kid feel bad so have this discussion or possibly fight well in advance of the kid coming over.

- Response by aron77, A Mr. Nice Guy, Male, 36-45, Kansas City, Celebrity

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Him sharing a bed with his son is fine, but adding you to the mix is a little weird. It sounds like neither you or the son actually live with him, so I would tell him that it makes you feel uncomfortable sharing a bed with his son and then don't sleep over the same nights he does anymore.

- Response by heavenonearth27, A Creative, Female, 29-35, Toronto

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Community Rating: Community Star

Him and the kid is fine in a bed. Adding a girlfriend that is not the child's mother is NOT FINE.

- Response by randyl, A Thinker, Female, Who Cares?, Technical

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And you stay with this guy? Wow, let him know that you will not be second to anyone, and to buy the boy his own damed bed.

- Response by masterbody1, A Guy Critical, Male, 46-55

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You are right to feel uncomfortable.If my boy slept in the same bed as my husband's girlfriend he would not get visitation rights.Let him get mad and tell him it's out of line.He needs to get a fold away bed for the child in the living room.

- Response by frenchkiss49, A Thinker, Female, 66 or older, Tampa, Who Cares?

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If there isn't another bed, the bf should have the son sleep on the couch when you are there. He is too old to be sleeping with dad and the girlfriend. But okay if he sleeps with dad when dad is alone.

- Response by seajaih, Female, Who Cares?, Who Cares?

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