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Active Questions

Why do men "disappear" when they are no ...
1:12 AM - Monday June 23, 2003

Why do men "disappear" when they are no ...

Why do men "disappear" when they are no longer interested, versus just breaking up with you?

- Asked by An Alternative Girl, Female, 29-35, Boston, Technical

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They do not want you to hurt there feelings,by leaving they think there in control,they can tell the boys that he broke up with you ,it really means he is a coward

- Response by jjb1958, A Rebel, Male, 36-45, Boston, Technical

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men run from any emotional situation ,its their macho instinct.instead of being fair and saying there is no spark any more ,they fear rejection or an asssault on there egos so they just dissappear,hope it helps,grab the next guy,maybe he will be sensitive to your needs.

- Response by curly52, A Jock, Male, 36-45, Boston

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After breaking up with you, a man has invested much more of his time/money/effort in you than if here was merely interested. Because he has invested in you more, he will want a return. It doesn't matter what the return is, friendship, ex-sex, or advice. When he's just interested, he doesn't invest as much, and is willing to take the loss without a return. Kinda sounds harsh, but that's economics for ya.

- Response by inotnuts, A Father Figure, Male, 36-45, Newark, Retired

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Easier than telling the woman something to their face... Saves on the "its not you its me moment" (or other BS that guys and girls tell each other when that moment comes...), the embarrasment and the hurt feelings (at least from the guys point of view where the girl is breaking down in tears in front of him !)

- Response by jer006, A Mr. Married Guy, Male, 29-35, Boston, Science / Engineering

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Oh if you find out the answer to this please email me...LOL

They are cowards...this happened to me too, probably the same guy since I'm in the same area as you..LOL

Anyhow, I think its easier on them to just disappear that way they never have to have a confrontation with you as to why things aren't working out. They are chickens and it amazes me that men in their 30's still are chicken Sh** about this. UGGH!!!

- Response by hockeygirl17, A Sportif, Female, 29-35, Boston, Administrative

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Tip - honesty and openness during your relationship with him will guarantee some of the same after you break up.

- Response by 1in1000000, A Mr. Married Guy, Male, 46-55, London, Medical / Dental

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