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Why does my boyfriend deny about him cheating even though i have the evidence and still lies.
Married Life / 3:41 PM - Thursday March 24, 2011

why does my boyfriend deny about him cheating even though i have the evidence and still lies.

i would go through my boy friends phone and cathch him on the spot about him texting other females and he says that he hasnt and he has been calling other females. but my problem isnt that. my problem is when he does text and call other females he always tell them the same story. how he is tire of me, he had kicked me out but i wont leave, how he doesnt love me. and when i ask him if thats how he feels he says no.

- Asked by sables420, A Thinker, Female, 26-28, Los Angeles, Who Cares?

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You are actually the person with the problem here. He has shown you who he is and you continue to play the same lame game over and over. I don't understand women like you. You are with a man who is a philanderer either genetically or just because of other issues. This is who he is and yet women like you feel you are the victimized ones. You aren't. You are the stupid ones who deny to yourselves who these men are. You keep telling yourselves they should be someone else...someone they aren't and have never been. You are actually victimizing THEM with this crap. I've seen way too many women do this to think it anything other than a dynamic that feeds your own belief that you are perfect and martyrd and mistreated....poor, poor you. NOT.
It's a simple as this...either you love the man and turn a blind eye to the less desirable things about him or you don't really like who he is in which case you move on and leave him to women who like him aren't going to find his behavior all that offensive or threatening.

- Response by joybird, A Hippie Chick, Female, 46-55, Who Cares?

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Why do you think it's OK to go through his phone?

He should definitely dump you. You are untrustworthy.

- Response by llafsroh, An Intellectual Guy, Male, 46-55, Boston, Science / Engineering

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wow...I would pack up my shit and leave his ass! DUMP HIM!

Kick him to the curb! You won't leave??? Leave this loser with your chin up!

- Response by thekissbandit, A Thinker, Female, 29-35

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He's probably tired of you going through his phone, for sure.

If you don't trust him, haul your butt to the next candidate.

- Response by stillagoodguy1, An Intellectual Guy, Male, 46-55, Celebrity

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Ahh girl, you need dumb that sorry SOB and get yourself a real man.

- Response by kalicalendar16, A Hippie Chick, Female, 29-35

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you havent broken up with him yet. Why should he fess up?

- Response by newnumbersguy32, A Mr. Nice Guy, Male, 36-45, Financial / Banking

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So, what exactly is it that you're attracted to with this guy?

- Response by chesterdad, An Intellectual Guy, Male, 56-65, San Francisco

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The question here should be- Why am I accepting this behavior?! Life is too short to prolong the inevitable. Pack your bags and move on. If you feel you must go through any mans' phone, then sweety, he's not the right man for you!

- Response by noemi1126, A Married Girl, Female, 36-45, Dallas, Who Cares?

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He's trying to avoid the DRAMA
you like to bring. That's all.

- Response by fehkarfight, A Couch Potato, Male, 46-55, Who Cares?

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Dont be blind, this guy is meth and you need detox.
Do your self a favour and pull away as painful as the withdrawal may initially feel

- Response by vancitian, An Intellectual Guy, Male, 26-28, Vancouver, Artist / Musician / Writer

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Ah lord, not another one.

I swear you make me tired.

What you want to hear? Just tell me and I'll say it, cause the lord himself knows already that you do not want the truth.

He kicked you out of the house. He's seeing other women. Constantly. In your FACE about it.

What do you want to hear? That he'll change? That he's just testing you? That he really loves you and will stop playing with you if you leave?

What? What you wating to hear?

Cause I refuse to believe you're so STUPID and CLUELESS that you honestly don't know the truth.

That he's an asshole who isn't worth your time, and you're being foolish and stupid to stay with him.

- Response by hnygrl, A Career Woman, Female, 46-55, Managerial

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WTF! Why are you leaving the relationship decisions up to your lying cheating boyfriend. Who cares how he feels! The man is incapable of being faithful and honest and for me this would be a deal breaker. You are too damn young to stick around in this type of relationship. Time to move on and find a real man!

- Response by kdtxchic30, A Thinker, Female, 36-45, Who Cares?

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I'm not sure who's more screwed up here - you or him. But I'm leaning towards you.

He kicked you out, but you won't leave? What kind of an idiot stays someplace she's not wanted?

- Response by justpassingthru, A Thinker, Female, 56-65, Financial / Banking

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If you have the evidence and he is lying then leave. You need to end this toxic relationship and learn why you accept such treatment. Waiting for a man to kick you out or admit to cheating shows you have the problem here. Rosey

- Response by roseytalks, A Thinker, Female, Who Cares?, Tampa, Who Cares?

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Because, he thinks you're stupid and will accept any excuse even though you know the truth. Because, you don't want to end the relationship. You want him. But, you want him to be a good boyfriend and he's not. You know this now. It doesn't matter how you found out at this point. So, telling you how wrong you were does nothing to help you. So, I'll just say this, instead of wondering why he's still lying when you've seen the evidence. Ask yourself, why are you still calling him your boyfriend? Why are you still listening to his explanations? Why are you still with him?

Especially, with all of this "evidence" you know you have? If you say, it's because you love him. Then, you might as well love him and keep knowing he's cheating on you. It doesn't matter if he's having sex. What he is saying to those other women is enough for you to know he's trying to hook up with them. Seriously, you really need to let this one go. Sorry, but he isn't any good sweetie. If you're gone from the relationship you'll never have to hear another lame excuse. You will not have to hate yourself for being a fool and accepting a relationship that is less than what you want from a partner. And, you'll give yourself the chance to meet and find real love with someone who isn't going to cheat and try to make a fool out of you. Please do it for yourself! Good luck.

- Response by thelovedovefor1, A Creative, Female, 46-55, Atlanta, Who Cares?

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Shit it aint cheating if he's already told you to leave,...... My question is if you keep catching him and he keeps saying he's tired of you ...he kicked you out and you wont leave,,,,, he doesnt Love you....WHY THE HELL ARE you still there..... NO`ONE CAN TREAT YOU BAD if YOU DONT ALLOW IT!!

- Response by boxer1, A Guy Critical, Male, 46-55, Self-Employed

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If you go through your mans phone two things happen:

1. You lose credibility in the whole "trust" debate.

2. You turn him into a secret agent.




- Response by mrsavage, An Intellectual Guy, Male, 29-35, Who Cares?

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Because even now you are somehow not sure. You want to hear it from the horse's mouth. There is still some doubt in your mind and that admission of guilt would end it. That's why guys deny....deny....deny... .

- Response by ponadidas, A Life of the Party, Male, 29-35, Pittsburgh, Other Profession

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Tell You What Eaither Tell Him How Thinqs Are Gunna Go And Make Them Plain And Simple Or Be Played Like A Fool. Specially If Your Still Sleeping With Him. Eaither Lay Thinqs Down. Leave Or Kick Him Out. In My Opinion He Has To GO! He Is A Loser & From The Way It Looks On Your Profile Picture Your Beautiful & Dont Deserve To Be Treated With Such Disrespect!

- Response by A Thinker, Female, 22-25, Miami, Who Cares?

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Well. Your relationship is definitely going nowhere. He's screwing around and you're going through his phone. Nice downward pattern I see here.

- Response by myrtletyrtle, A Cool Mom, Female, 46-55, Who Cares?

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I have this theory if you look through someones phone/email you get exactly what you deserve.

Move on sista... Kick his punkass to the curb...

- Response by glowinangeliz, A Cool Mom, Female, 36-45

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Get rid of the louse.

- Response by dambreaker, A Father Figure, Male, 56-65, Retired

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Isn't that called being a squater, if you don't leave?

- Response by richard77, A Jock, Male, Who Cares?, Self-Employed

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Ignore the responses bashing you. People who haven't lived through it don't understand how it's possible that living with a person who's abusive often makes the victim do crazy things.

Recognize you're doing crazy things.

If the relationship was healthy and normal, it's most likely you wouldn't have been driven to invade his privacy in the first place.


The wisest thing you could do is pack up and get out immediately, even if that means going to live with relatives or a with a friend, sleeping on a couch or something.

Get out before you go further over the edge. Preserve your mental health, repair your self-image, figure out what you found so attractive in this "Player Dude" and find a way to get over it, fix yourself.

Good luck

- Response by A Sweet Sarah, Female, 46-55, Who Cares?

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I've been there girly. He isn't right for you, and I understand how hard just to leave someone that you love. My suggestion to you is, sign up for match.com, is what I did yesterday, then you will see tons of fishes in the sea, try to date around then settle down. My last experience was moved in with an incompatible man trying to solve some unsolvable issues. I didn't realize how easy to go find a new man, so I was stupid trying to settling down with a jerk. Good luck, dump his ass. Say bye bye. Next time when he comes around, say "too late, I've found someone million times better!"

- Response by urrfavgurl, A Trendsetter, Female, 29-35

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You do realize you didn't mention a single thing that can honestly be considered evidence of cheating?

- Response by windlord, A Guy Critical, Male, 26-28, Who Cares?

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You do realize you didn't mention a single thing that can honestly be considered evidence of cheating?

- Response by windlord, A Guy Critical, Male, 26-28, Who Cares?

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He said that he's tired of you, and who wouldn't be tired of somebody who won't give them a bit of privacy.

He said that he doesn't love you.

He said get out!

He's NOT cheating, he's just moved on and you won't let go.

- Response by alecsmart1, A Guy Critical, Male, 46-55, Celebrity

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He said that he's tired of you, and who wouldn't be tired of somebody who won't give them a bit of privacy.

He said that he doesn't love you.

He said get out!

He's NOT cheating, he's just moved on and you won't let go.

- Response by alecsmart1, A Guy Critical, Male, 46-55, Celebrity

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