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Husband is always annoyed with me.
Married Life / 7:06 AM - Monday January 17, 2011

Husband is always annoyed with me.

My husband and I have had a few months of a rough patch that we are trying to get through. We were on the brink of divorce and he is the one who said he wanted to save the marriage. We have spent a week sleeping seperate so that our hot tempers could cool off. Last night we got together to go to dinner for the first time since the divorce talk and he acted like everything I said was so annoying. It really took the wind out of my sails since I was hoping we were trying for a new start. When I dropped him off he said "that was good, I had fun." He actually hugged me and gave me the thumbs up sign like things had gone well. I thought just the opposite since he acted so annoyed. What is my next move? I don't know what to do and I can't be with someone who is always angry with me. I do so many things to try to make his world happier and he can't even be nice. What to do???

- Asked by A Sportif, Female, 36-45, Seattle, Veterinary

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If you really want to save your marriage, please seek counceling.

Your communication has broken down, if you can't have dinner together, without having different perceptions of the outcome.

If he doesn't want to go to counceling, he isn't willing to "hear" what you need to make this it isn't going to work. He is going to have to be willing to make changes too.

My ex was like that. He expected that all the changes would be made by that he would be "happy". He was unwilling to make the changes needed for me to be happy. Sucked, but I learned one person cannot make a marriage good. Won't happen. :(

- Response by mamom04, A Sweet Sarah, Female, 56-65, Phoenix

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Get counseling. Obviously you have a massive communication problem. Don't assume anything about him or his feelings from now on. You need a trained third person to give you perspective.

- Response by llafsroh, An Intellectual Guy, Male, 46-55, Boston, Science / Engineering

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Go to marriage counseling ... BOTH of you together (it doesn't work if only one person goes).
Did it with my g/f several years ago ... it helps.

- Response by andrewj5267, A Guy Critical, Male, 36-45, Miami, Teaching

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Quit trying so hard.Let him worried about what you are doing! That what's wrong now in marriage, the women always the one do it all.Then something don't go right they blame you.No way.If he kept being annoying don't cook supper.Let him kept guessing what's going on.Then tell him,Until you quit being annoying I'll get back to myself.Play hard ball,You know.For Once and see what will happen!? Good Luck.

- Response by god60, Female, 46-55

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I'm kind of confused about the dropping off part, sounds seperated. Oh yeah, that suerly could bring about some fustration, especially when one is insecure in their relationship. So stop being selfish, you obviously have the upper hand, try to get a good look at his emotions. He's scared!

- Response by 2jacksam, An Intellectual Guy, Male, 66 or older, Denver, Self-Employed

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Do you have children? If not and you're not happy you'll never be happy. Remember, a leopard never changes his spots

- Response by ecppelofont, A Life of the Party, Male, 56-65

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