Back to Home

Active Questions

Found out my husband is crossdressing and put an ad on Craigslist trying to meet men. Is he gay?
Sex & Intimacy / 10:29 AM - Monday November 01, 2010

Found out my husband is crossdressing and put an ad on Craigslist trying to meet men. Is he gay?

I've busted him before trying to meet women on collarme.com, but this a first! It seems he couldn't meet any women that wanted to dress in BDSM outfits and wear thigh highs for him, so now he wants to wear them and meet men as a crossdresser and perform sex acts on them. Our sex life definitely went down the tubes when I caught him on collarme last year, and I'm sure that's his excuse for all of this. I know they say men who crossdress aren't necessarily gay, but how can that be? He wants to perform sex acts on men. How many men out there do this but yet have wives and kids and otherwise "normal" lives? He's 100% man's man, redneck, etc. I imagine that he would just die if any of his friends knew about any of this. I don't think he cares if I catch him, he just denies everything and tries to tell me I'm crazy. But what if his guy friends found out? I am embarrased for him and I don't even know what to say. I don't even want to tell him that I know but I don't want him bringing home some freakin' disease!! what do I do? what would you do?

I wish I wasn't financially stuck here. I don't want to take my daughters father away from her either. After all the craziness I've seen in this relationship, I don't think I could ever trust a man again.

- Asked by A Hippie Chick, Female, 36-45, Self-Employed

Read more about the Rating System


Im Curious, What possessed you to go on that website in the first place? Were you snooping? What?

- Response by handsomedetroitguy, A Father Figure, Male, 36-45, Detroit, Political / Government

Rating Received:

Community Rating: Community Star

Well why won't you do his fantasies with him? Would that be so horrible?
I suggest counseling for both of you.

- Response by llafsroh, An Intellectual Guy, Male, 46-55, Boston, Science / Engineering

Rating Received:


Research shows that crossdressers are not gay but straight men who like to dress as women. But your husband is acting more like a bisexual man who wants both genders. I think you need to tell him what you know and discuss it. This marriage is over as he isn't going to change his sexual preference and it sounds like you aren't going to accept it. As for being financially stuck...get a job and some independence to raise your daughters. He is unfaithful... how much more do you need. Rosey

- Response by roseytalks, A Thinker, Female, Who Cares?, Tampa, Who Cares?

Rating Received:


Crossdressing is one thing a cheating spouse completely another whether it is with another woman or man. What is really bothersome is the lack of trust in the relationship obviously you found out what you did behind his back. I'm not saying you didn't have just cause to investigate but I would recommend marriage counseling to deal with these issues before the two of you end up past the point of no return. And if you find out these were only fantasys in his mind then who knows you two might just have a lot of fun together.

- Response by maggied01, A Rebel, Male, 56-65

Rating Received:


Apparently you ain't the only one busting your husband! LMAO

- Response by momof4, A Creative, Female, 36-45, Administrative

Rating Received: