Man has NO male friends: Red flag?
My boyfriend and I have been together for 2 years. I moved from NY to FL to be near him 6 months ago. I love Florida! We have talked of marriage and kids. He has no living relatives and really wants a child. We live separate for now. My girlfriends and I went out for dinner cruise this past Friday night, and the topic of his friends came up. Someone asked me what I thought of his friends, and I said from the few I have met, they were great. But, then another pointed out that they thought it was strange that ALL of his friends are female. And very young. I don't have a problem with that either, I said. I tried changing the topic, but they continued on for quite a bit on their own.
I am 42 and He is 61. Again, no issues with the age range here--we are really truly compatible in so many ways. But then I thought as I was sitting there, how many men ONLY have female friends, and they are all young enough to be grand daughters??? (he does not have any children, yet) Again they continued on about how that was not "normal." They insinuated that he is most likely sleeping with them. THAT upset me. They said they were kidding, but...I left early.
I guess I never thought about it before, but now I wonder WHY a man his age would have NO male friends-not even one, and only very young girls (21-25 seems the age range)....most are bar-girls, waitresses or their friends. Again no issues from me before. He has said before in passing, though, now that I think about it, numerous comments about their "hot bodies..." and "how he wishes he was 40 years younger," or "wow she really knows how to wear that tiny bikini!" Informational: of about the 50+ girls, NOT ONE of them is below what I would call "model material," an 8 out of 10 beauty scale and none are larger than size 4. Tall, slim and long hair. All of them. This is Florida, and they work at jobs where bikinis and LESS are the work wear: bars, restaurants, beach & boating type events, etc.
I never really paid attention until my girlfriends pointed it out and how they thought it was bizarre. After my girlfriends asked questions about who they were, what they did and why they call my BF, etc.. I began to wonder if I am the only one that has not seen this? True, I shrug off his comments about the "hot bodies, etc" and trust him because I love him.
Now, I am wondering "why I am even in the picture---perhaps because none of them would have sex with him" (a comment from Lucy at the dinner)?? He does seem to run when they call, and sometimes I am left waiting or what I would call, placed on the back burner as they seem to be a priority to him at times. Again my trust and honesty and love with him are enough for me, but now they are making me feel like I am closing my eyes while something else is going on. My GF are now questioning why I am not seeing this as a huge red flag. They think I am being taken advantage of.
Why would a man NOT have even one male friend? Not even one? He is well liked by his neighbors and at his job, he works at NASA, so most of his co-workers are men. Am I being too naive or am I just too gullible and not seeing this?
- Asked by Female, 36-45