Do some guys just like a little drama in their life?
I dated a guy a few years ago, for a fews years. It was an ugly on/off relationship..never anything truly serious because he was Mr. No-Committment...which is what caused all our fighting, and eventually our ending. (He is now with another girl and has been the last couple years.)
For some dumb reason...we just cant quit each other and move on with our lives. I dont even mean in the relationship sense...that is all long gone obviously... but we do still talk nearly every single day (when we are on speaking terms) and have met up for coffee, etc. We are actually truly good friends, when we get along.
I admit I'm a bit of a drama queen when it comes to him... he does things that make me so mad and that anger gets the best of me. I call him all kinds of names, say hurtful things, threaten to tell her he still sees me (only for coffee but still..she would NOT like it if she knew...) I wouldnt really ever tell her, but just to make him mad. Problem is, he doesnt get mad. He'll just tell me to do what I have to do.
So the question...through all our fights, all my irrational outbursts (some of them jusitifed though!), name calling, hurtful things said and done, slaps across the face (deserved, he cheated...but still something I never should have done..) Anyway, through all the hell I have put him through over the years...he still wants to talk to me and be friends. Why??? And same with me...no matter how many times he's upset me or done shitty things (and trust me there is a long list of them)...I still want to talk to him.
We'll stop talking after a big fight for a couple weeks..then he'll eventually send a msg saying he misses talking to me, etc... We begin talking every day again, until something comes up again that causes a fight. We agree "we cant be friends, it doesnt work...lets go our seperate ways.." Then we do for a couple weeks...until someone caves in and msgs the other again. We call it the "circle." We just go in this never ending circle.
Whats the deal?? Are we just each others bad habits that we cant break? Or...have we gone through so much together that we just do care and always will? I dont know why we cant just cut each other out of our lives after all the hurtful thigns we've done to each other....we're so toxic...yet we just have some kind of connection we can't crack.
- Asked by An Alternative Girl, Female, 36-45, Toronto, Technical