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Guy getting married and starting a family after age 50: pros and cons
Jokes, Polls & Anything Else / 8:15 PM - Monday June 07, 2010

Guy getting married and starting a family after age 50: pros and cons

I have been a bachelor for 20 years -- got married when I was 22, divorced when I was 30, and swore I would never make that mistake again.

For some time, I have been experiencing deep regrets about not having a wife and family.

Is it too late for me to do this? I know about some of the medical risks -- what is your opinion? Do you know any older men who managed to start a family later in life? How did it go for them?

- Asked by An Intellectual Guy, Male, 46-55, Los Angeles, Financial / Banking

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My dad was 50 when I was born and turned 51 6 months later! He was the best dad on earth to me. My mom was 43 when I was born to. Nowdays 50 is the new 35! It is not about your age, it is in your mind. If you want to be old, you will be no matter what your age.

- Response by kmf1, A Life of the Party, Female, 46-55, Minneapolis, Who Cares?

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It's not as big an issue for the guy, assuming you can find a woman who isn't too old that she would have difficulty getting pregnant. The main thing is you don't want to be looking like Skeletor showing up at the kid's high school graduation.

- Response by istillhatescrennames, A Mr. Nice Guy, Male, 66 or older

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My brother in law was in his late fifties when he married my sis. He'd never been married, and never had kids. He just never found a woman he felt he could do that with.

He is an excellent husband to my sis, and step-father to her 4 grown sons. He's gotten very close to her boys, and looks forward to the grandbabies. :)

All I'm saying, is that even if you don't get kids of your own (biologically), it doesn't mean you can't have a wife and family. :)

- Response by mamom04, A Sweet Sarah, Female, 56-65, Phoenix

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It's never too late if you have it in your heart.

- Response by joeblow1234, A Creative, Male, 46-55, Whitehorse, Artist / Musician / Writer

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I think if now is when you are ready then now is when you should go for it. If you had a child in the next few years, you still can have every reasonable expectation of seeing that child into adulthood. My friend had 4 kids in his 20s, 30s and later re-married. He is 54 with a 7 year old daughter and they are all quite happy. You will most likely give up your retirement years but this is a fair trade-off for all you will gain if that is your sincere desire.

- Response by maryea, A Thinker, Female, 56-65, Retired

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I know someone whose parents had her when they were 50 and she said it was like growing up with grandparents.

- Response by wandatrick91, An Alternative Girl, Female, Who Cares?

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Damn!!!!!,what you gonna do, make a bunch of babaies. Can't believe neither one of you have kids. That vow you made to yourself, guess a little reality showed up in there. Hale to the king, here's the skinny. You done got tired of being you, probably wasn't no fun any whoo!. You feeling left-out, when you was feeling in. Mind full of doubt, what's life all about. It's all about living, if it's a family you want, then it's a family it'll be, just prepare for your demise, and all will be well.

- Response by 2jacksam, An Intellectual Guy, Male, 56-65, Denver, Self-Employed

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There generally aren't any risk for men. The risk is for the woman who is over 40.

Personally, I don't see any "pros" to have a child so late in life other than a child that carries on your genes. And I feel it is "unfair" to the child.

Cons are child being embarrassed by parents everyone thinks are grandparents. Being too tired/old to want to play sports with your child when you're 60-65 and the child is 10-15 years old. Not being able to "retire" due to having to support a child. Using your "nest egg" to put that child through college when you're almost 70. Strong possibility of never seeing your grandkids because you're dead. Some of these cons may not be a factor is you are inherent wealthy or have a super duper salary to where you can have assistance for you and your wife in raising children so late in life.

- Response by msadvise, A Thinker, Female, 46-55, Transportation

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There are several in New York city who settled down in their 40s and 50s. Very common. I don't think there is anything wrong with a man settling late. My bf is 37 and he never been married and has kids. He would love to be married and have kids but working hard to be more financially stable. I don't think it is too late but do it soon. :)

- Response by allyirls, A Trendsetter, Female, 29-35, New York, Fashion

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My Dad was 44 when I was born...I was lucky because by the time I came around he was financially established, he was not a nervous parent, he was involved and active in my life.

Honestly, I think I kept him young!! Sadly, we lost him last year at the age of 92 but he was a 'young' 92!!

- Response by scooper, A Sportif, Female, 46-55, Dallas, Who Cares?

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