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Do men move on faster than women after break up?
Dating / 4:09 PM - Saturday June 05, 2010

do men move on faster than women after break up?

- Asked by mangopi, A Sweet Sarah, Female, 36-45, Who Cares?

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I think it depends upon how great the love was and the pain it caused. I don't think it's a guy or girl's a personal emotions thing.

- Response by lasttrueromantic, A Creative, Female, 36-45, Teaching

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I would say yes due to my own experience. I have been divorced for ten years now and my ex who remarried almost immediately is already been divorced for the third time now for over two years. Lately he says he has a 'girlfriend'. I am still alone so what does that say? See, men get to do the asking.

- Response by englishrose4945, A Life of the Party, Female, 66 or older, Miami, Alternative Medicine

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I don't think they necessarily move on faster, they just tend to grieve the loss differently than women do. We sit at home crying and sulking and they go out and live it up and try to forget about us. Of course their method doesn't work any better than ours and they still suffer but hey, whatever floats their boats!

- Response by houseworkmakesyaugly, A Married Girl, Female, 36-45

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I'd say most of the time, yes. They love those different ice cream flavors but never pick a favorite.

- Response by jillopo, An Alternative Girl, Female, 29-35

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No, definitely not. At least not "real" men anyways. From my own observation I've seen many more women already moving on while they are still with the man they are moving on from......

- Response by canajun, A Mr. Nice Guy, Male, 56-65, Vancouver, Self-Employed

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I don't really think so, when it's real love. But, I think sometimes it can appear this way. Because, some men were never into that woman deeply in the first place, but that's not how the woman thought it to be. With most women, even if they settle for friends with benefits, it doesn't take them long to start investing emotions and developing feelings of love for that guy. Because, they really had hoped and desired that type of relationship would eventually develop when they met the guy. They can't move on because they have nothing else exciting going on in their life, and they don't truly believe they'll find another guy that made them feel the same. They question more about what it was about them, or what they did, or what they could do that might change the guys mind. They'll stay friends with the guy and even sometimes continue to allow them to have sex with them, and this keeps hope alive.

Men, on the other hand, can meet another woman the same night of a break up and this helps him move on. Because, they never did or are not going to stop their social life or hanging out with their boys where the ladies are at. They get back into the social scene quickly. The type of women who can't seem to move on, usually sit at home eating comfort food, watching romantic comedies, and crying her eyes out, with a lack of understanding about why the relationship didn't work. They focus on the pain. The key to moving on quickly is to have a great social life and things you did before the guy ever came into their life, that you never stopped. That way, when the guy leaves, you can fall back on those things. Because, that's what the guys that seem to move on faster do. The only time guys don't move on any faster is when they react the same way a woman would, regarding those they've met. No one can become your whole life. No one likes to admit they do this. But, they do. If you make a person your whole life, it will take a long time to recover. I don't care if it's a male or a female. IMO

- Response by thelovedovefor1, A Creative, Female, 46-55, Atlanta, Who Cares?

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I totally agree with what lasttrueromantic said. I don't think its gender specific at all.

It has to do with the depth of love and the pain of the loss of that love.

Some folks move on quickly, some don't. Some try to, but can't really commit fully so soon, and fail miserably...hense, the high divorce rates of subsequent marriages...

- Response by mamom04, A Sweet Sarah, Female, 56-65, Phoenix

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Once the milk has been spilled the men will let the dog lap it up and get another glass right away with out a thought whereas the woman will take the time to clean it up properly, cry that it was spilled before she even thinks about getting a refill then has to call her friends to let them know what happened before the thirst come back to her. Does that metaphor make since?

- Response by jimmymichael01, A Rebel, Male, 56-65, Executive

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Not necessarily.

- Response by king313, A Rebel, Male, 29-35, Detroit, Technical

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Think about this: 74% of suicides are MEN, and DIVORCE is the leading cause of suicide in men.

- Response by chesterdad, An Intellectual Guy, Male, 66 or older, San Francisco

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some men move on during a relationship/marriage.. .

- Response by osieboo, A Thinker, Female, 56-65

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yes it seems like between 2 weeks and 2 months later they are already dating. I know this for experience. Don't get me started on when a wife dies. I know an older guy, when his wife died, three months later he was already dating.

- Response by angel84, A Thinker, Female, 29-35, Student

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Like a few people alluded to, guys are the ones who flip out and do the murder-suicide. Women lay in bed crying for a few days then are back out there dating with a smile on their face.

- Response by usmc85, A Rebel, Male, 36-45, Other Profession

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some females move pretty fast also

- Response by bigcurt, A Mr. Nice Guy, Male, 56-65, Pittsburgh, Self-Employed

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Yes men do! I blame it on the lasting effect of a patriachial society and probably the psychologial set-up of women. The former eexcuse means men tend to the the asking, and society is always full of more women than men, so the ladies are always lining up to a guy. The latter excuse means women develop a different kind of emotional attachment. From experiences, sure if get back on the social scene you forget in the moment about the break-up but as soon a you end up in your bedroom alone, emotions start flooding back. Most women take time before getting intimate, so while we are alone in our beds, the guys are already kicking boots, and they don't have to remember the past all night!

- Response by bbperfume, A Thinker, Female, 29-35, Administrative

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No I don't think that either gender moves faster after a break up because it really depends on how much love they had for one another, how long they were together and who did the breaking up...when I broke up with my childrens' father after 7 years together, it took me about two years before I could 'think' about dating again because it was a bad breakup and one that I didn't think would happen because we were going to marry and he didn't start going out with anyone for at least a year after our breakup...:)

- Response by fastball, A Cool Mom, Female, 36-45, Edmonton, Self-Employed

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Only when they have time to prepare for a new home/apart and have their financial obligations all planned out. If the split involves living together then you decide what belongs to each other. If stuff was bought for both, then you take your own stuff and compromise on mutual things with the understanding that most women would want the sentimental things. This type of man would move on faster than the female. But if there are problems when you broke up and he didn't initiate anything he would probably be confused as to why a breakup and have not made any plans. He'll go out with a few buddy's and cry over too many beers. They will try to get him cheered up, tell him not to worry and offer a place to crash until he finds another apart. He will be slow to move on. Then the final man has it planned to get a UHAUL truck after you leave the house and move out to a new place he picked out weeks ago and move his stuff before you get home to a half empty house. He might leave a note,"Mangopi, Guess you can tell i moved out." He 'll keep his new address from you and tell you leave message or text. So those are a few situations i know from real life. Men might or might not move faster. The type of family and friends he has will influence his decision too. Take care.

- Response by orlyfudd, A Creative, Male, 56-65, Retired

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