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If you know your spouse is lying, what do you do about it?
Married Life / 5:00 PM - Thursday June 03, 2010

If you know your spouse is lying, what do you do about it?

I happen to know that my wife has told several lies to me recently. After some deep conversations and her promise to stop contacting an old male friend of hers, I found out (via hitting the "back" button on IE) that she is still in touch with him.

The bad part about snooping is that you have to then deal with this new information.

If I confront her, then she knows I snooped. I promised to stop snooping and she promised the same. So now, ladies, what should I do? We have been married for 13 years and have three kids, and apart from this past year, our marriage has been quite good.

I think this relationship is mostly platonic, but I don't like it because she is hiding it. We usually don't hide stuff unless there is a reason.


- Asked by kopfjaeger, A Career Man, Male, 46-55

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just ask her what does she want to do next?

- Response by osieboo, A Thinker, Female, 56-65

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Community Rating: Community Star

If your wife has counted on you to do the right thing by her while she has wronged you unrepentantly, what loyalty do you owe her to lie to her?

"There is nothing covered over that will remain secret or hidden that will not become known," says Matthew 10:26.

True to HIS Word, Jehovah has uncovered your wife's dishonesty with you. That's why he let her do her dirt via computer where every transmission is recorded and timed: you hit the back button on the IE browser, which showed her last page of history she either didn't think or know to delete!

All there is for you to do then, is thank Jehovah for showing you the truth, follow HIS lead and tell wifey the jig is up and time she "'fessed up!"

- Response by thedaimler2006, An Alternative Girl, Female, 56-65, Atlanta, Self-Employed

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Get rid of the computer.

- Response by catscratch, A Thinker, Female, 46-55, Executive

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And if the reason she is hiding it is so that she doesn't have to face your wrath for contacting a purely platonic friend? What then?

- Response by siouxzen, A Career Woman, Female, Who Cares?, Guadalajara, Self-Employed

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Your online commitment status is blank. Why should she stay unwaveringly committed to you when you aren't giving that to her?

- Response by A Guy Critical, Male, 46-55, Technical

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I have been in the same situation as you have been. My husband and I talked about it and he told me the relationship is simply platonic but it still bothers me why he needs to lie when it comes to this particular "girl" friend and why he would lie every time he goes out with her.
I too believe the relationship is simply friendship but it changed me a lot that it became a habit to snoop on his cell phone, emails, and even social sites. I hate myself for doing it but sometimes, you come to a point when you have enough. I told my husband he can't blame me if I don't trust him anymore and I have to snoop around to know th truth. Then after that, I told him all about what I saw or read that proved he was lying several times to me.

- Response by A Married Girl, Female, 29-35, Internet / New Media

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