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So...how many dates should a girl go on before she's getting in bed with the guys?
Dating / 12:02 AM - Friday May 28, 2010

So...how many dates should a girl go on before she's getting in bed with the guys?

Reading the girl's situation below, I can't help but wonder, how many dates should be enough for the guy to hang around, yet won't get the wrong impression that she wasn't into him? or...better yet, AT LEAST how many dates should a girl wait before jumping in bed with the guy without running into a similar situation below - i.e. he's got what he wants so he's not as interested anymore?

- Asked by linhtinhsweetie, A Thinker, Female, 29-35, Los Angeles, Consulting

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See, I don't understand what other women are doing wrong here. If I'm honest, I don't think I've ever waited until a third date to sleep with someone I'm into. But I've never had a problem keeping those guys around for an actual relationship (when I wanted one lol!).

So I don't know that it's about waiting a certain amount of time. I think maybe waiting makes a guy more likely to stick around long enough just to get sex, like a conquest of sorts. (not all guys obviously but definitely many) Also maybe it's just coincidental - they happened to have sex on the third date. After three dates, I would think you start getting an idea of whether or not you want to forge a real relationship with a person and maybe she's just not the girl for him. Maybe it's ALWAYS a coincidence, people are assuming that finally having sex is the cause for the "relationship" to fall apart but really in those baby stages, it may have nothing to do with that.

- Response by lizarella, An Alternative Girl, Female, 26-28

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He got what he wanted, Game over.

- Response by duggers, A Guy Critical, Male, 66 or older

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It's not how quick it happens...it's the connection. If that is good it can happen after the first date...or maybe not until the 10th. But no serious relationship will happen until the connect happens!!

- Response by mrwondering11, A Creative, Male, Who Cares?, Portland, Managerial

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No..save what you have left of your self-respect. It appears that his mission was accomplished. you've been conquered and there's no excitement left. You evidently want more out of the relationship than he does. Cut your losses and minimize your anguish. Next time find what you want in a man before you give him your goodies!!

- Response by boobie, A Mr. Married Guy, Male, 56-65, Denver, Retired

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Honestly, she waited 3 dates and that's probably good but it's not a magic number by any means. I'd say enough dates to vet the guy out and find out what his agenda is. I think in her case, she just got a guy who wanted sex and nothing more. I say a very minimum of 3 dates; but again, that can't be hard and fast either. I mean I've slept with guys on the first and second dates and was able to establish relationships with them...so I guess it just depends on the guy.

- Response by lioness21, A Player, Female, 29-35, Consulting

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