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Why is ignoring texts considered ok?
Dating / 1:40 PM - Monday May 17, 2010

Why is ignoring texts considered ok?

In the last few days, there seems to have been a few questions involving people not responding to texts or doing things via text message. Quite often I've seen people give a bunch of reasons or excuses why people don't respond to text messages and why its ok.

In my opinion not responding to a text message is just as bad as not responding to a voice mail or email, but obviously others don't think the same way. So if you are someone who thinks its ok not to respond to a text, but thinks people are rude for not returning a voice mail or email, I'm just curious about your reasoning.

Update: May 17, 2010.
There are a lot of passionate answers on here. So maybe I wasn't clear on what I was trying to say. I'm in no way saying that if someone texts you (or calls or emails for that matter) that you are required to respond that second. As someone who is a working professional I know thats not always possible. However I do think that it is common courtesy to respond within a timely manner to those messages that call for one (such as questions). Now a timely manner of course depends on what you are doing at the time, but I feel like responding within a few hours is usually doable. I mean you can respond to many texts in less than a minute. I do think that with texting, phone calls, emails, not to mention facebook and smartphones, that we have become entirely too accessable to everyong. I'm just saying that if you give someone all of these ways to contact you, you shouldn't be mad if they use those methods, and you should extend them some common courtesy as you would with a phone call or face to face interaction.

- Asked by brando1002, A Mr. Nice Guy, Male, 29-35, Chicago, Internet / New Media

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The post above yours. Some women send out a HUNDRED texts a DAY.

You actaully, honestly, gonna sit there and tell me you would respond to EVERY SINGLE TEXT she sends you? EVERY SING ONE? ALL DAY LONG? EVEN WHEN YOU'RE IN FRONT OF A CLASS YOU WOULD STOP AND REPLY TO HER TEXTS?


Didn't think so.

- Response by hnygrl, A Career Woman, Female, 46-55, Managerial

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phones, texts, etc are forms of making yourself available. it's your decision. so if you call or text and I don't respond, it's my prerogative.

doesn't mean I don't like you... just means I've decided I will respond later.

BTW, I live by the sword and die by the sword. So if I don't get a response, I understand it.

- Response by sillyrabbit879, A Guy Critical, Male, 36-45, Retired

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Texting costs me $ and I have specifically asked people not to text me but to call or e-mail me.
That is one major differece between the two. Since I have specifically asked you not to do X I feel no remores in not responding to X.

- Response by jjcabin, An Intellectual Guy, Male, 36-45, Washington, DC, Technical

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I alwyas treat them the same way they treated me. if they don't respond to my e-mail or text then when they want to know something I don't respond.Childish but it works.

- Response by pepperman46, A Mr. Nice Guy, Male, 46-55

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It's easy to read a text message quickly and then forget out about. It's unintentional. A voicemail on the other hand stays in my memory because it's more personal and the person's voice imprints in my mind for a while.

If someone is a serial texter, you have to ignore them sometimes to get them to stop.

- Response by 1junebug, A Cool Mom, Female, 36-45

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I don't think it's okay to just not respond to a text. However, I think it's ludicrous to expect people to respond right away to a text. You equate a text with a voicemail or email (as well you should) and think about it - how often do you expect an instant response to a voicemail or email? You don't. So why do people expect it with a text?

Additionally, a lot of people send texts that don't really require a response (those who send many, many texts each day about trivial things shouldn't really expect a reponse from everyone every time they send some stupid message) OR they send "blanket texts" that aren't specifically intended for one person (I never respond to those).

- Response by lizarella, An Alternative Girl, Female, 22-25

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People have the right to privacy. I'm not sure why people 'expect' others to answer every text/call/VM/email. Just because we have access to others (via cell phone) 24/7 doesn't mean they are obligated to respond. Maybe it is rude but maybe it is also rude to push communication on someone who might have other things going on. Cell phones are just a tool - not a priority.

- Response by chal08, A Rebel, Male, 29-35

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One of the reasons I hate having a cell phone is that people can find you anywhere. Just because someone calls me or texts me doesn't mean I'm obligated to answer. Thats why theres caller id. Maybe the people who dont text back are busy with their own stuff. Its kinda arrogant to think everyone has drop everything and text people just because they called or text

- Response by dahlia22, A Creative, Female, 36-45, Other Profession

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Well if someone sends me 10-15 useless texts in a hour I'm not going to respond. Some people are worrysome. Damn. Some people need to get a life and put down the cell phone.

- Response by misskitty420, A Cool Mom, Female, 29-35, Student

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I have to say, I disagree with your update. Let me tell you a story. I use to work in retail and on my days off, my managers use to always call to see if I could come into work. Alot of the times, I just didn't want to be bothered; so I wouldn't answer. By me not answering, they would get very angry with me, saying that I was rude to ignore their calls. I use to say all the time, just because I have a cell phone, that doesn't mean I'm obligated to answer to my mangers while not at work. I'm sure you would agree. I pay my phone bill, not them. So until you personally pay their bill, they don't have to answer. Thats just how it is.

- Response by bts4life20, A Trendsetter, Female, 26-28, Self-Employed

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I see nothing wrong with the lack of an immediate response to ANY of these. Incoming communication that is not in person, is a REQUEST for my time. I do not honor all requests equally.

An email or txt is one-way. I am getting information, or giving information. I do not need to respond "asap." If it's urgent or important, let them call me. I see a phone call as more important, since it requires real-time contact.

I check caller i.d. before I pick up the phone, and to prioritize order of response to missed calls or voice mail.
Same with email and txt.

Sorry, but not everyone who tries to contact me is equal.

I do not answer ANY phone calls after 9:00.
The first time you do, you are telling people - "sure, call me any time, I'll pick up." No way, no how.

And if it's an emergency, there's next to nothing I can do over the phone anyway. Personally, I'd rather go to sleep without knowing someone died or had a terrible accident. Nothing I can do now anyway.


- Response by tooluser, A Career Man, Male, 36-45

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Your excitement about sending a message does not create an obligation of my time and effort.

IF I enjoy sending messages and feel like sending one I may, or maybe not. Its up to me, not up to you.


- Response by greenwind, An Intellectual Guy, Male, 56-65, Construction

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i think it is TOTALLY rude not to answer a simple text that asks specific questions. Especially questions that have to do with making plans with one another. It is disrespectful of that askers time not to respond with a yes or no. A quick way to lose a friend if you ask me. Texting takes less than a minute but not responding and the anger and hurt feelings it can cause can last a lot longer and ruin relationships. It is the same as a phone call or email - no different. Not answering says "I don't care enough about you or your feelings to bother typing a 30 second response". not saying you have to respond immediately but within 8 hours is reasonable.

- Response by busymomof1link, A Thinker, Female, 36-45, Los Angeles, Self-Employed

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