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Why is it so hard for a married man to leave his mistress?
Sex & Intimacy / 9:51 AM - Thursday March 04, 2010

Why is it so hard for a married man to leave his mistress?

I mean....do you guys REALLY love them anyway? What is the deal?

- Asked by semperfi73, A Career Woman, Female, 36-45, Cincinnati, Executive

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As a past mistress to many men, YES, they DO love their mistress. It is like a serious girlfriend.
Also, the forbidden aspect of it all is addicting as a drug!
forbidden fruit and all...
Yes, I have had some married men love me the best.
They are afraid to leave their wives for one reason or another. Or they Love their wives ALSO. It IS possible to love more than one person. it is.

The mistress has qualities his wife doesn't have, nor could she. You can't be goodyGoody church-going AND a freaky sex whore. Normally. He wouldn't WANT both in the same person, you get it?



- Response by discotrash, A Career Woman, Female, 29-35, Las Vegas, Other Profession

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He'd be losing his Ego boost, his side sex, his stress-reliever, his doting attention giver. It has little do with Love according to the Men that I know that had Mistresses. They may LOVE all of the things they get out of the relationship and will tell the Mistress they love them to keep getting it, but they don't.

They may or may not love their Wives too but having a Mistress is a sign of character flaw, not something that his Wife caused" out of lack of something. There's much better ways to handle that if that's the excuse. Mostly though it's simply he wants it all---the image of the happy family and good wife and the excitement of managing something forbidden on the side.

I am my old mans Mistress. There's nothing another woman could do that I don't and if he finds himself still in need of such after we get Married, that's HIS (and her) problem--not mine. I know I have no lack in the freaky dept, the attention dept, the giving dept, the support dept, the 'cool' dept, etc just like many Wives don't have a problem in those areas. But if they married a man without character, then they'll be at risk for getting cheated on too.

- Response by thottienc, A Career Woman, Female, 36-45, Who Cares?

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heres a good idea stop messing around with married men . thats just trouble wating to happen.

- Response by misdestar, A Creative, Female, 29-35, Self-Employed

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Men who have a mistress or GF do not want to leave because they are everything that the wife cannot be, only because the husband has not take the time to invest in his marriage. If he asked the wife to be and do some of the things he likes the GF to do, there would be no need for a mistress...

Also, there are no legal or moral committment ties to a mistress. He can end it with no reason, and walk away, scott free. Not so with a wife....

This makes it very advantageous to have a girly on the side. All the action but no responsibility.

- Response by iowaczechartist, A Thinker, Female, 36-45

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Men that engage in extramarital affairs are liars living a lie. Once you let that kind of thing into your life it can be hard to get rid of.
I find it funny that people keep having a debate about whether cheating men LOVE their mistresses, wives, children, etc...

A man, or woman for that matter, who knows what love is--LOVE, not lust, not a sense of obligation to get the bills paid, not the temporary feelings that people try to pass off as love--but real love, could not cheat.

A person who knows what love is will value it above all else, because every good thing comes from love. Love inspires and motivates us to reach for the best of who we want to be, not to lie, cheat, and disregard the effect that our actions have on the people we've made commitments to.

I think that cheaters have yet to understand what true love is or what it requires. Attachment and lust have little to do with real love.

- Response by lovesglow, Female, 36-45, Self-Employed

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