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Being facebook friends with my son's ex girlfriend?
Family & Parenting / 3:13 AM - Monday March 01, 2010

Being facebook friends with my son's ex girlfriend?

You may remember I posted about this about two weeks ago..

My son and his current girlfriend were very upset that I was still friends with a former girlfriend of his on Facebook. My son demanded that I quit communicating with her.
It caused me some anger towards him and his gf, but I am trying to be a good mother and I am TRYING to behave toward the current gf (who he claims is the love of his life).
Friday was old gf's birthday. I sent her a private message thru FB wishing her a happy birthday.
He woke me up with texts at 3:45 a.m. on Saturday saying that I needed to stop communicating with her immediately, that she needed to be the furthest thing from my mind. SO, I got a private message from former gf today saying she is removing me and my daughter from her FB friends because my son and his current gf are harrassing her about talking to us.
Is it really so wrong to stay friends with her? She's a beautiful (inside as well as out) girl, too good for my son, I'm afraid. I have no ideas or schemes to get them back together. I don't talk to her on the phone or see her socially or anything other than an occasional remark on FB and I feel like I am being unduly chastized by someone due to jealousy. I'd like to tell the current gf to grow the eff up.
In fact, the more I think about it, the angrier I get about the whole thing. Grr!

Update: March 01, 2010.
I appreciate your input. I think some of you have misconstrued the level of friendship that I have with this young lady (very casual). At any rate, the issue is now moot because the ex has expressed her desire to be left alone by my son and his current gf and in order for that to happen, I will leave her alone, too. Cake

- Asked by cakelady, A Cool Mom, Female, 46-55, Denver, Food Service

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I think it is your business who you want to be friends with. But although FB is a great way to staying in contact with people, it also is a public announcement resource. Some things are better left private. FB gets people in alot of trouble. Anger, jealousy is more of an issue. Everyone knows your business. I would recommend you keep things more private so you don't have to deal with criticism.

- Response by ghpooh, Female, 46-55

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I think who you're friends with is your business. I'm still friends with one of my sister's exes. She gets pissed when I talk to him and says I should like him. I say that I have nothing against him and what they did is their business. But I guess other people don't always see things the same way we do and when you throw bitter emotions in there people can get irrational.

- Response by damnpoor, A Couch Potato, Male, 29-35, Other Profession

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Community Rating: Community Star

Yourv son and his current gf need to grow up! They can not pick and choose your friends. Why do you let him have so much control in your life. Tell them to back the H--- off!

- Response by tweets4u2, A Married Girl, Female, 46-55, Teaching

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*shouldn't* like him

- Response by damnpoor, A Couch Potato, Male, 29-35, Other Profession

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Who you choose to be friends with is your choice. Now there must be some conflict going on between them becouse of how much is going on.

- Response by darkflyer, An Intellectual Guy, Male, 29-35, Who Cares?

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This is very wrong comming from a son's point of view its his ex mom get off her nutz and listen to your son

- Response by 21young, A Rebel, Male, 26-28

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First of all, how old is your son? If he's old enough just tell him to mind his own business. YOUR friends are YOUR friends. Just because he isn't seeing her is no reason YOU can't communicate with her.

Your son and his girlfriend need to grow the $#^(# up.

- Response by bookman, A Guy Critical, Male, 56-65, Who Cares?

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You are spending too much time involving yourself in something that should be obvious to you. Your son's ex is his past and you should respect this. You are going to create problems with your son that you might regret. Surely you have friends your own age and can respect your son and his new gf. Rosey

- Response by roseytalks, A Thinker, Female, Who Cares?, Tampa, Who Cares?

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Not cool mom! Why cause this much trouble in your son's life? He is moving on, why can't you?

- Response by boggob, A Guy Critical, Male, 29-35, Political / Government

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So as they attempt to control you , a scene from the future might help...suppose the ex is a pediatrican, detective, or banker and they need her never know what the future holds, There is no need to burn bridges between your son,his new one and the old one...the new one may soon be an old one too, Stay friends with the ex!

- Response by foreal, A Creative, Female, 56-65, Who Cares?

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Hi, im in the exact same situation but im the current girfriend... and im sorry but it's not being immature.. its a respect thing. I feel that you should respect your son and his current girlfriend because if it was you, you would probably be hurt by this too. The ex girlfriend wants to come see my boyfriends neice who was just born... im sorry but there's a line that shouldnt be crossed with ex's!! My boyfriend has been talking about marriage with me, so why would i want his ex still in the picture... If i ever have a son i would never do the same, but this is my opinion.

- Response by lovelybones03, A Hippie Chick, Female, 26-28, Toronto

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It's a good thing they've run GEESTER off here.

- Response by fehkarfight, A Couch Potato, Male, 56-65, Who Cares?

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what the hell? you should never say things like that about your very own son. yes your wrong. your his mother why do you need to be friends with his ex?

- Response by j3s5e, A Rebel, Male, 29-35, Who Cares?

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