How long would you give your bf to get his head straight?
My boyfriend of almost a year & I had a big fight, resulting in him dumping me. He said we could talk in a week in person, when we'd both be back at school.
When we talked, he still wanted to end it. Then he said we could get dinner the next night & see how it went. Dinner was fine, but he still wanted to end it. He said half of him wanted to stay, half didn't.
We talked after dinner & went over every single thing that was wrong in our relationship from the beginning. It took a LOT of talking, but we finally reached an agreement.
He said he can't be with anyone right now. We decided we need time to be our own persons again and be independent.
He said we can go to yoga together once a week, talk after yoga, and see how things go.
However, it seems like he doesn't want to talk in between. He said he needs to get over our past as if he were getting over a break up.
I asked him how long he needed and he had no clue. I know I need time too, but I'd be fine in a couple of weeks.
The question is...how much time do I give him to get his head straight? I know he's sensitive & needs to get over the past horrible week...but I can't just be around waiting.
We promised not to sleep with anyone else in the meantime & to tell people we're working on rebuilding our relationship.
Update: February 02, 2010.
We actually are on decent terms right now.
We've been hanging out (on my terms too!) and talking honestly about all of the problems in our relationship.
We decided to start over & take things slowly and try to better develop our friendship. We're still exercising together and going on dates, but decided we aren't ready to start saying "I love you" again or sleep together.
It seems he just freaked out because things were getting too serious, but whatever. I gave him an ultimatum and he decided he wanted this to work.
If it doesn't end up working, at least we gave it an honest second chance and will be ready to part on good terms.
Thank you for all the advice!
- Asked by mdb8825
, A Thinker, Female, 26-28, Boston, Student