My husband and I are separated and I still have feeling for him .
And I still would like to work it out, however, he's fed up and he doesn't want to deal with me anymore - he won't even speak to me and he still has a ton of stuff at the house. What makes things worse is he's got a new girlfriend already - it's only been two weeks!!! I knew he was talking to another girl - this is what led to me telling him to leave.
I was talking to a friend of his the other day and he asked my husband well what happened why did you decide you wanted to ruin your marriage by talking to other girls and his response was - because it wasn't working out - WTF kind of response was that??? Like we were together for 9 years, lived together for 4 years and been married only a few months. (I never wanted to be a "wife" that why I refused to get married until just recently - he would have married me years ago). So, I kind of don't get the -it just wasn't working out- what wasn't working out??? And it pisses me off that he won't even speak to me about it and he tells everyone that I am refusing to let him get his stuff and I'm doing all this mean, bullshit things to him. Truth is I've texted him about 3 times in the past 2 weeks asking if he's coming to get his stuff and telling him how much I love him and that I want to try and save this marriage. And I get no response - as if I'm texting the air. So, his friend was like if he comes back in six months would you take him back? I thought long and hard and I said yes, I would - if he was willing to change for our marriage, no change or no growing up, then I know he's not serious about saving us.
I was wondering besides the -it just wasn't working out (what the hell does that mean -really?) -would I be a fool to try and work things out if he came around in 6 months or however long? How long is too long to be able to work things out? I know we're young (32) but I think he's going through a mid-life crisis. Or he's pissed that the money ran out - and I started telling him no he can't buy this or no he can't get that and no I'm not giving you money to go play poker with and then I put him on an allowance. So, I think he's pissed that I'm not giving him everything that he wants - which I use to spoil the piss out of him. He's a fool for walking away - things would have gotten better with time. Money's just tight now.
I never wanted to think that he was only with me for the money or for the things I use to do for him. But all signs point to it - like I made him get a job and I was making him pay bills and -huh- it was like I was taking his freedom away from, by taking his money away from him. I never thought he was so petty -funny thing is the money really ran out September 2008, it's just now it's really tight because of the winter.
- Asked by A Trendsetter, Female, 36-45