Thank you for your many years of support. We want to share the news with you that after much consideration, will cease operations in its present format on October 15th. We appreciate your meaningful contributions over the years.
Back to Active Questions

Active Questions

Why does he still talk to his exes?
Dating / 2:11 PM - Tuesday December 22, 2009

Why does he still talk to his exes?

After my boyfriend and I were together for a couple of months, he mentioned that the wine I was currently drinking had been recommended by his ex gf. I was shocked as he went on to explain that he still frequently spoke to 2 of his exes, the ones who cheated on him, that he had dated YEARS before we met. I asked why and he said that he had "trouble letting go", so I told him I wasn't comfortable seeing someone who still spoke to their exes - especially ones with pasts like theirs. He said there was nothing wrong with it and I could leave him if I wanted. However I stayed with him, though we still argued about it a lot.

Two months after I found out about them, he told me that he deleted them from his call list and from his email accounts because he doesn't want them to cause problems. Yet...I don't know that I believe him considering he kept up talking to them for 3 years and 2 years after the breakups. He has numerous email addresses he could contact them from and has memorized their numbers so...I can't help but be suspicious.

It also concerns me that he cheated with 2 of his 4 girlfriends and 2 of the 4 cheated on him. Should I worry that he still talks to them or that he is prone to be unfaithful?

- Asked by Female, 29-35

Read more about the Rating System

well in all reality, you can't force someone to not speak to someone.. they had history, you can't ignore the fact that , that person exist.. some exes remain friends because they get along better as friends than lovers .. i am still friends with some of my exes.. as a matter of fact new years eve i will be attending my children's father's wedding.. no big deal.. i know deep down inside she is girl don't like the idea.. but he is my friend, hey their marriage might not work out.. but our friendship will. so you either have to except it, or not stay in a relationship.. .. to be real about it.. it just shows your insecurity.. and that's not good.

- Response by mburgos, A Cool Mom, Female, 46-55, Philadelphia, Who Cares?

Rating Received:

He can't be trusted until proven!!. It takes time, a lot of time. If he seems like a good man and you're still young maybe you can try. It seems he wants to try

He was honest to tell you, either he doesn't care if you know or he needs to vents since he can't let them go even I believe he wanted to let them go out of his system.

He is young and maybe he is not that into you, if he is in love with you, he will only want to see you. You should have walk away when he lent you his ultimatum, " He said there was nothing wrong with it and I could leave him if I wanted"


- Response by azianchemistry, A Player, Female, 46-55, San Francisco, Who Cares?

Rating Received: