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I am 60 years old and have a beautiful wife age 30 who thinks its wrong?
Married Life / 11:16 AM - Sunday November 29, 2009

I am 60 years old and have a beautiful wife age 30 who thinks its wrong?

We have a 9 year old daughter from her previous marriage and twin sons age 2 we have been Married almost 4 years..Every one always stares at us or ask if they are my grandsons I say no I am the dad and WOW do I get dirty Looks..We love each other very much we never argue or have a cross word I found her on the internet and we fell in love She is A french gal from Benin republic in Africa..I adopted her daughter and we are one big happy family..Why does people always think if a married man marries a younger woman Shes a GOLD DIGGER and hes a Sex Maniac. cant our society accept real love? I want feedback

- Asked by A Guy Critical, Male, 56-65, Transportation

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When I was 24 I was engaged to a man in his sixties, we had a 2 year old son together. He also had a 29 year old daughter and a 26 year old son from a prior marriage.

People always thought he was our son's grandfather, especially when we were out with his son. Yeah, people give you some real runny looks.

In the end, if you are happy, then that's all that matters.

- Response by A Life of the Party, Female, 36-45, Boston, Who Cares?

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Dude. That's just creepy. And you have twin 2 year olds? How much of a Dad can you be in ten years when they will be 12 and starting to play sports?

- Response by llafsroh, An Intellectual Guy, Male, 46-55, Boston, Science / Engineering

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Community Rating: Community Star

Well, if you're so certain what you have is good, why do you even care what randoms on the internet think?

- Response by tabbycat1, An Alternative Girl, Female, 29-35, London, Internet / New Media

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I would think it's odd, frankly, but, at the same time - if it's true love and the two of you are happy... who cares what I or anyone else thinks? At 30, she is old enough to know her own mind. It's not like you are with a child. And obviously she is happy with you. I am sure her children love you, too. So, be happy and don't care what the rest of us think.

- Response by curvysmartgirl, A Creative, Female, 36-45, Dallas, Artist / Musician / Writer

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You're happy....your lovely wife is happy...your children are happy...so what if 'society' doesn't accept? Screw society.

SOCIETY is NEVER happy. Society is just jealous.

Congratulations on having a happy life. More power to you.

- Response by drumboi2, A Guy Critical, Male, 56-65

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While your situation might be the exception, too many others in your shoes create the stereotype. Don't worry so much what other people think, just be happy because at the end of the day you know your relationship better than anyone else.

- Response by melmac, A Thinker, Female, 29-35

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The same problem exists for women today. My girlfriend married a guy 13 years younger and gets asked all the time if he is her son. They have been married ten years! I think that in general people who have married in their age group are uncomfortable with others who do not. They attribute it to "God that is disgusting it would be like dating my daughter". But what they fail to realize is that this isn't your daughter. You are just two people who did not let the wide gap between your ages keep you apart. You obviously had much more than age in common. And viewing the number of divorces involving same age couples that is no guarantee for success. My 70 year old uncle was married three times. Each time his wives got younger. He had children with all of them. Ten to the first, 1 to the second and two to the third who was over 30 years younger. Age is just a number, when people stare just smile and then kiss your wife passionately. Let them eat their hearts out..:-)

- Response by cinders717, A Sweet Sarah, Female, 36-45, Who Cares?

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Society has a need to pigeon hole everybody and everything. Your relationship with a young woman is scary to many who cannot tolerate diversity or difference from they. Many people look down on interacial marriages and they look down upon two heavy people together or two guys or two gals together and so on and so on and so on. Good luck to you two and many years of happiness and forget the small minded amongst us.

- Response by william45, A Career Man, Male, 46-55, Chicago, Teaching

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I wouldn't worry about it at all. The important thing is that your family is happy. My boyfriend's father married a woman a couple of years older that me and they have been married for 20 years now so don't even sweat it!

- Response by nymodel3, A Creative, Female, 56-65, Atlanta, Fashion

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Several reasons: jealousy and out of the norm. I wouldn't let it bother you as people will always be petty or curious, it's just human nature. As long as you are both happy, just ignore them.

- Response by hulagirl55, A Sportif, Female, Who Cares?, Who Cares?

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no. agism reigns. beyond that, arch stereotypical thought is the bedrock of this society that, historically, has great difficulties embracing evolutionary or enlightened trends. nope. your union will forever be viewed askance, which is too bad, but is just as likely to remain very happy for you all which, in the end, is all that matters.

- Response by two469, An Alternative Girl, Female, 18-21, Seattle, Science / Engineering

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What do you think of women who are involved with men 7 years or more younger?

- Response by A Thinker, Female, 36-45, Other Profession

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I think legal adults should do what they want, and if you're happy, just be happy and ignore everyone else.

However...think about the fact that you found your young beautiful wife in a dirt-poor country. If you think she was NOT looking for a way out of her sorry life by marrying a "rich" Westerner, you're kidding yourself.

- Response by justpassingthru, A Thinker, Female, 56-65, Financial / Banking

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I myself think it is great that you two are in love. I see nothing wrong with it. And most are just jealous that they don't have a love like yours. So try not to worry about all the looks and stuff. Be happy with each other. As long as you love each other, nothing else matters. Take care. Keep loving strong and hard.
TTFN

- Response by summerlysnow, A Cool Mom, Female, 36-45, Home Maker

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I'm also 60 but my wife is 55 and she has stunning 31 year old daughter. Reading your post, I was putting things into perspective, realizing my step-daughter is the same age as your wife, and wondering if I could relate to a 30-year old woman anymore. (or better still, could they relate to me!)
I'm glad you have found happiness and hope you continue to have a great marriage. Don't worry about the idiots who stare, and don't listen to the nay-sayers here in this forum either.

- Response by hearmenow, A Guy Critical, Male, 56-65, Other Profession

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I'm also 60 but my wife is 55 and she has stunning 31 year old daughter. Reading your post, I was putting things into perspective, realizing my step-daughter is the same age as your wife, and wondering if I could relate to a 30-year old woman anymore. (or better still, could they relate to me!)
I'm glad you have found happiness and hope you continue to have a great marriage. Don't worry about the idiots who stare, and don't listen to the nay-sayers here in this forum either.

- Response by hearmenow, A Guy Critical, Male, 56-65, Other Profession

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its because of all the horror stories you see on t.v. , as long as your both happy dont worry about what other people say and think and judge about you... its really none of their concern

- Response by elaine8029, A Thinker, Female, 29-35, Medical / Dental

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I think they are jealous they should be happy for you

- Response by bigcurt, A Mr. Nice Guy, Male, 56-65, Pittsburgh, Self-Employed

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The feedback is: Stop worrying about what other people think. This is your life and your marriage and it is no one else's business. There are rude people everywhere, and if you are going to concentrate your attention on them you will always be angry and unhappy. Find some decent people to have in your life as friends and ignore the ignorant busybodies who want to run everyone else's life.

- Response by realman95, A Guy Critical, Male, 66 or older

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Lucky bastard!

( I wouldn't look at you funny )

- Response by deephate, A Couch Potato, Male, 56-65, Who Cares?

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If you are making the marriage work, that's all that matters. Don't pay attention to what people might say behind your back. I commend you.

- Response by betterbird, A Creative, Male, 46-55, San Francisco, Administrative

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The society will always judge no matter what. It is never different with interracial marriage, older woman marrying younger man, and your case. If she truly loves you, and you truly love her, nothing should bother the two of you at all. All the best.

- Response by findingserendipity, A Sweet Sarah, Female, 36-45, Auckland, Medical / Dental

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As long as the two of you have found happiness, then you both have made a wise decision. Good luck!

- Response by richard77, A Jock, Male, Who Cares?, Self-Employed

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It's really the same reason a friend of mine hated Michael Jordan or another wouldn't listen to Sting. It's why would-be vocalists shout down American Idol. It's why Tina Fey crapped on Britney from the start. "How Dare You Have What I So Badly Want For Myself...Because I'm God And I Deserve It". Human beings are simpering children, and Americans simper on High most of their lives. I'd call it envy, but that would insult a Deadly Sin.
As for me, God Bless You, sir. I'm 48, and feared my Life was over. More so than George Foreman himself, you've offered Hope.

- Response by morethanafeeling, An Intellectual Guy, Male, 46-55, Artist / Musician / Writer

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As long as you're happy and she's happy..... who cares??

- Response by king313, An Engaged Guy, Male, 29-35, Detroit, Civil Service

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There is no law saying that two people who are in love cannot marry, regardless of age (unless it is a minor child). Your situation is unusual, which is why you get the funny looks, etc. The only problem I would have in marrying someone much older is the fact that I might become an early widow or end up taking care of the man when he becomes older or has to go to a nursing home. If you are happy, I rejoice with you, and hope that you two will have a great life together, ignoring what other people say/think.

- Response by experience101, A Thinker, Female, 56-65, Who Cares?

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That's because people are brainwashed so badly by society, education and the media. Throughout most of human history it was common for men and women to sometime have vast age differences. Only in this so called "Enlightened" society and because of modern psychological and other often ridiculous factors do people think that you have to have a certain age range to be married.

I've also found that I get along much better with girls sometimes considerably younger than myself. Just as it's natural for men to often like shorter women and women love taller men, why should age opposites be any different? This is just another dimension of attraction but right away people can't look beyond it to see if the people are happy, get along and are good people, that is all that counts.

What GOOD is it if two people are within societal "norms" of age but they fight, argue, hate each other and destroy the kids as they're raising them because of their fighting..it's NO good that's what.

But most people would rather have it be that way because of their OWN inability to deal with a relationship that's out of their own or societies norms then to know that two people love each other and are raising their children in a loving, well adjusted and happy home..no...that doesn't matter at all..only what this backwards, warped society thinks right... FREE your minds people!!

- Response by richsifu, A Rebel, Male, 46-55, Science / Engineering

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This is a tough one.. as I am the daughter of a man roughly your age and my father has married a very young girl/lady.. Cant say that I am happy about it, as they are now exspecting a baby, and well... my dad will be 70 when the kid is 12, so that side of it is tough. Why did you go for someone so much younger ?

- Response by lollypie, A Life of the Party, Female, 36-45, London

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Sounds like you have found love, so good for you. Enjoy it and screw what others think. I would say your situation is no more different than a 60 year old woman finding love and marrying a handsome 30 year old man, which is also perfectly fine and wonderful, when you share the same interests and values and are totally in love with one another. Where ever you find love, who cares what others think? It's your life, not theirs. People are prone to be judgemental, it's human nature, that's all.

- Response by majicou, A Thinker, Female, Who Cares?

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I think people are just jealous of your happy relationship and lovely family.

Heck, as a nurse she doesn't need anyone else's money! Plus you guys have beautiful, healthy children and love one another. These other folks are just jealous and wish they had it so good.

As for the "sex crazed" 60 year old, who the heck cares what these ignorant people think about your sex drive? Just making assumptions about someone else's sex drive is rude! Whatever yours is, it doesn't really matter. The folks who make assumptions about t are surely just subconsciously lamenting about their cold love lives.

You two seem hapy and in love. That's all that should matter.

- Response by milla, A Thinker, Female, 36-45

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You need to ignore what others think or may think. If you are happy with her, isn't that all that matters?

- Response by seductivepisces9, A Thinker, Female, 29-35, Who Cares?

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if you guys love each other i dont see the big deal at all. age is only a number.

- Response by ter3092, A Sweet Sarah, Female, 22-25

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So ... ... The Love of Your Life is 30 years (young) huh ? ...


Yes, ' A Guy Critical ' ... yes ... this is very wrong and ' almost ' unacceptable ...


Uuuunnn .. -- .. less you're considering sharing her now and then with A ... A, A I don't know ' A Creative, Male, 26-28 ' from ' Johannesburg ' maybe/ perhaps ... ?!? ...


* Chuckles somewhat in-distinctively *


You have a wonderful and ' joyous '/ joyfulness Life now, ' A Guy Critical ' ...



- Response by A Creative, Male, 29-35, Johannesburg, Internet / New Media

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not wrong.....just unfair...when i am a 60yr old women........im pretty sure the 30yr old guys wont be 2 interested in me (i barely register with them now)

- Response by A Hippie Chick, Female, 29-35

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Your relationship is really nobody else's business but yours. If being together makes both of you happy and meets your needs...who cares what anyone else thinks??? Even if she were primarily with you for the sake of financial security and you were primarily with her in order to prove that you've "still got it"...who cares??? I realize that I sound a little cynical when I say this...but whether people want to accept it or not, the fact is that the exchange of sex for financial security is the primary transaction on which marriage has historically been based and on which it continues to be based in the present day in some parts of the world. Even if your relationship were based on that kind of exchange, I for one see nothing wrong with it as such provided that both of you agree and are satisfied with the arrangement. After all, every marriage involves a certain degree of quid pro quo -- the fact that I might not understand or approve of the kind of exchange that exists between two partners in a specific marriage doesn't mean that there's anything wrong with it. It might not be right for me...but if it works for them, that's all that really matters.

- Response by giginyc, An Alternative Girl, Female, 46-55, Who Cares?

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Ahem. Do you know what llafsroh looks like?

If you did, you would laugh yourself silly re-reading his criticism of your athletic abilities.

I don't think your relationship is a problem--at least you're a happy human being who HAS a relationship. Anyone on this site who criticizes you is probably like the guy who got the community star for this thread--he has no life, invents women and spends hours spamming people he doesn't like and can't talk to rationally. ;)

- Response by electragold21, A Thinker, Female, 29-35, New York, Teaching

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I think it's wonderful....I am one who prefers an older man....so don't worry about what others think...you just be happy and enjoy one another.

- Response by lasttrueromantic, A Creative, Female, 36-45, Teaching

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Hi, I am 24, I have a relationship with a man who is 30 years older, he has daughter in my age, still married, and for years lives with other woman, quite complicated, but we love each other...there is a no problem to be together if we hide our relationship, but his and especially my family would never accept it. I am really happy that you already have a big happy family and that you don't need to hide anything.

- Response by jannettemae, A Thinker, Female, 26-28

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I am 61 and the love of my life is 31. neither of us have been
married before and neither of us has ever found another human
being we would want to be with as much as each other. Age is only a number. If you have true love as much as my wife and I do then just ignor what others think or say!

- Response by An Engaged Guy, Male, 56-65, Technical

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to put it bluntly shes waiting for ya to die but untill then enjoy that 30 yr old putang!

- Response by amberslogic, An Alternative Girl, Female, 29-35, Who Cares?

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but wait, she is a sex addict, and loves how I give her anything she wants-including my enhanced male virility which is still my prized asset-

- Response by movi, A Guy Critical, Male, 46-55, Administrative

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That's a very romantic view, etherealleah, but it is totally unrealistic. Age DOES matter. I was with a man nearly 20 years my senior for 5 years. I soon realised I didn't want to be a 40-something year old woman taking care of her 60-something year old husband, ending up resentful and bitter. Would YOU want a life like that?
What happens when you retire soon and she has to continue working for decades after you??

- Response by A Trendsetter, Female, 29-35, Las Vegas

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I judge no one. The fact that you are asking tells me you may have some issues with it.

- Response by redbone, A Career Man, Male, 56-65, Food Service

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I hope this is a real post. Nothing wrong with it if you love each other. Think Ana Nicole, Pavarotti, and many other people who married women young enough to be their grandchildren. I would do it given the opportunity. Enjoy it, and get a got life insurance policy for your children.

- Response by int24h, A Career Man, Male, 36-45, Alternative Medicine

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Any man who would f*ck a woman young enough to be his DAUGHTER has serious mental issues.

You're a good candidate for chemical castration, you sick old man.

- Response by A Player, Female, 26-28, Who Cares?

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