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How long should a person wait before asking someone to be your boyfriend or girlfriend?
Dating / 3:35 PM - Thursday November 26, 2009

How long should a person wait before asking someone to be your boyfriend or girlfriend?

general Question for everyone.............

- Asked by Female, 29-35

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The sooner you ask, the quicker you can both get married.


- Response by bluegenel, A Mr. Nice Guy, Male, Who Cares?, Technical

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Community Rating: Community Star

I don't know if there is a specific time frame per se. I think it would depend on how you both feel at the time. For me, it's usually anyway between 1-4 months depending on how much I like the guy.


- Response by fanny500, A Thinker, Female, 29-35, Financial / Banking

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In our most modern age, I think the term "boyfriend" or "girlfriend" is whatever it means in the mind of the person contemplating the relationship. Which makes it very difficult to answer your question with any degree of cogency. However, in general, if you just keep making friends, eventually both of you will acknowledge the fact that you have become boy/girl friends. It is less a matter of calling it so, than earning the mutual respect that is required. rek

- Response by rekkonball, A Guy Critical, Male, 66 or older, Retired

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As soon as you realize that you don't want to date anyone else.

So the time frame varies from person to person.

- Response by piscesrising, A Thinker, Female, Who Cares?, Boston, Internet / New Media

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Well, The best relationships are formed on a strong friendship. Many of those who have the best relationships have had stayed great friends for a long period of time (several months-several year usually)and THEN perused a relationship. However, It does sometimes depend on the two people.

- Response by mlcoast2, A Sweet Sarah, Female, 22-25

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Honesty, although I've been in serious relationships, I've never asked a girl to be my girlfriend. If I'm interested in being exclusive with a girl, I only think about what I'm going to do; basically that I only want to date her. Then I just start doing that; as far as she's concerned I know that she wants exclusivity when she does the same. If it's meant to be it will.

- Response by Tinkman12, A Mr. Nice Guy, Male, 29-35, Atlanta, Who Cares?

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The answer to your question depends very much on how you choose to define that word -- two people may have very different ideas regarding what prerequisites need to be met before that word can be applied! Personally -- even though I'm not certain that it makes any sense for a woman in her 40's to use that word anymore! -- a "boyfriend" would be a man whom I've been dating with increasing frequency over the past few months and with whom I've agreed to have a mutually exclusive relationship. At this point in my life, based on my experiences, I don't think a woman in her right mind really has any business viewing a man as her "boyfriend" until she has something more than just his word as evidence that he's interested in a relationship. In my opinion, I think a lot of women tend to develop an emotional attachment to a man too soon -- and since they want to believe that he feels the same way, they read more into a man's words than is really there. Frankly, unless or until a man asks her for an exclusive commitment, I think it's in a woman's best interest to err on the side of caution and assume that a man is still dating (and quite possibly sleeping with) other women -- and actually, I'm not really in favor of a woman *asking* a man to make a commitment since I've heard many men say that one of the things they hate is being asked to make a decision before they feel ready to make it. In the end, the length of time I'd want to wait before calling a man my "boyfriend" would probably vary depending on how long it took me and the man in question to feel sufficiently comfortable with each other to realize that we wanted to be together exclusively...which in my case would probably be at least three months at the minimum.

- Response by giginyc, An Alternative Girl, Female, 46-55, Who Cares?

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sometimes that answer can vary from 1 day to 10 years lol. Everybody's situation is different. My first gf, we made it official after 2 weeks. It pretty much came down to a talk about whether we were exclusive or not. After the first date I started seeing her everyday so it was a no brainer from there.

- Response by zslider, A Creative, Male, 29-35, Vancouver, Technical

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It really depends on both parties & when they feel they'd like to be exclusive. In other words, if you are feeling like your dating relationship should take a step up to the next level, I think you should bring that up to the other person of interest. There's not really a time span, just when the feelings are right. Love is timeless...and unpredictable.

- Response by cherbear80, A Sweet Sarah, Female, 29-35

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in my opinion its till you feel like being someones boyfriend or girlfriend.

- Response by CuppyCakey, An Alternative Girl, Female, 22-25, Student

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