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I just had a dream horrible dream about my boyfriend being gay should I tell him?
Sex & Intimacy / 10:49 AM - Thursday November 26, 2009

I just had a dream horrible dream about my boyfriend being gay should I tell him?

I had a horrible dream that my boyfriend in the dream wore a wig and was combing his hair just the way I was. My brother in law ended up walking in the room this was the first time he met him he left the room and started telling everyone in the kitchen he's gay. So family and friends in the kitchen were saying he was gay. I ended going back to my room and pushing my boyfriend back because he wanted to know what everyone was talking about. He went back in the room and I started telling him to tell me if he was gay to just tell me and he was putting his face down and just sobbing. I woke up. I have to be honest I have known him for a long time and we get along great. When he was in high school he never actually cared much for his appearance.

After high school he started taking care of his appearance more. He's kind of a hairy guy so he shaves alot. He also has done his eyebrows which were bushy. These make me suspect sometimes. He's had plenty of girlfriends but he's the nice guy kind that treats women well. He's also very silly which I like but sometimes will play with funny voices alot. He's always trying to make me laugh. We've also discussed this topic before in a serious way and he's always said he could'nt be with another guy. He talks about women but not so much objectively he was brought up with respect to women. Please should I tell him my dream or should I keep to myself and take it as just a dream?

- Asked by An Alternative Girl, Female, 26-28

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I dont see why the dream should bother you, ill tell you a bit about me, and cultures outside of america too (assumign your american).

When I was younger I was always very rigid and would not even step near anything pink or wear earrings etc, essentially you could not get a straighter guy. Thus I can associate with your boyfriend when he was in school, now these days men taking care of them selves is perfectly normal and even termed metrosexual when they take enough pride in it. I am not attracted to the same sex but I take a lot of pride in my appearance, i exfoliate, moisturise, buy nice clothes, wear an earing and even wear makeup if im having a bad skin day, need ot look my best or just want to make my eyes stand out (no one can tell im wearing makeup but I get comments on how good I look and its acceptable enough in british culture for me to tell my friends and family openly, in other cultures for example south korea metro sexualism is extremely open and noone would find makeup etc out of the ordinary). Taking care of oneself and being respectful of women does not make a man gay =) and is as old as modern man itself almost, rememebr makeup was first used on men not women, its just depends on the cultures you are influenced by.

And for the record ive had several girlfriends. Men kissing in some cultures is also acceptable (I kissed a guy once, never again it was gross ^_^ women have much nicer soft lips I dont knwo how any girl can kiss a guy)

- Response by fitnessfreak, An Intellectual Guy, Male, 26-28, Student

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How does any of this make him gay?

Has he ever put his dick in a guy's ass or sucked a dick? Those are the questions that determine homosexuality.

Something tells me you are from an Evangelical background where homosexuality is condemned.

- Response by vabyss, An Intellectual Guy, Male, 36-45, Who Cares?

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The question burning in my mind is whether the way he dresses and takes care of himself is bothering you or bugging you to the point where you sometimes 'wonder' if he is gay or not...sometimes things that bother us and we don't talk about can manifest in our dreams and play out because it's our mind's way of getting rid of it or dealing with those things...maybe it's not so much about him being gay that upset you in the dream but the 'fear' of losing him to another guy that is bothering you because he treats women so well and is actually respectful of your all honesty, I would just take it as a dream and that's it, sometimes our minds come up with crazy dreams just because we think so much throughout the day...:D

- Response by fastball, A Cool Mom, Female, 36-45, Edmonton, Self-Employed

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Normally I'd say that "it's just a dream", but for it to be in such detail, you might have the possibility of him being gay in the back of your mind. None of the things you mentioned in the latter paragraph would indicated that he may be gay. But there are manly guys who are gay too. If this it really bothering you, just tell him the dream and see his reaction.

- Response by italiangypsy, A Thinker, Female, Who Cares?, Philadelphia, Managerial

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Just remember, all of this is in YOUR head babe. Plus its highly unlikely you could affect his being gay or not so don't sweat it!

- Response by dane69, A Creative, Male, 46-55, Technical

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