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I'm not going home for the holidays because my parents are jerks....
Family & Parenting / 12:13 PM - Tuesday November 24, 2009

I'm not going home for the holidays because my parents are jerks....

I have decided not to go home for the holidays because my parents have made it clear that my boyfriend is not welcome to stay in their home. My step-father is very old-fashioned and feels that if we are not married my bf should go stay in a hotel room. My bf's parents are a bit more progressive in their thinking. When we visit them, my daughter and I stay in a guest room and he goes to the basement. We know it would be inappropriate to sleep in the same bed and my parents have more than enough room in their home (5 bedrooms) but they still refused. My mother assumed I would still come with my daughter but I refused because of this. I moved 1100 miles away from home almost 2 years ago and I'm in a city where I know very few people. Most of the people I hang out with are co-workers or members of my bf's family. We have been dating for almost a year and things are going great. I get along with all of his family and they have invited me to many function over time (weddings, church, dinners, graduations, etc.). It's like I am part of the family now. My bf and I are serious about getting married soon and everyone is happy for us...except my mother and step-father. They get on my last f-ing nerves with all their negative skepticism. It's toxic and it pushes me away from them. My mom is upset because she is not going to see her only grand-daughter but I don't care because I feel like if he is good enough for me to date for this long, they should welcome him with open arms. They don't even know him...my Mom met him once on a visit up here and my step-father has never met him. I was looking forward to them getting to know him and him seeing where I'm from but I feel like they are treating us like high-schoolers. We are both highly responsible 27 year old adults! I have my own child for heavens sake. So, to make a long story short I'm spending the holidays with his family where we are welcome. Am I overreacting???

- Asked by A Cool Mom, Female, 29-35, Political / Government

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