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How can I get over my ex girlfriend? She is with someone else already.
Dating / 4:34 AM - Sunday November 08, 2009

How can I get over my ex girlfriend? She is with someone else already.

Hi guys,

Broke up with my girlfriend two months ago, and already she is seeing a guy from her work.

She started her new job one month before we broke up, as we had completely different commitments, so thought we'd break it off.

I am 22, and the new guy is 27.

We were truly in love. 2 and half years of living together.

Since then I have slept with women, but I am surprised she has moved on so fast to a new guy?

Any tips on how to get over it, or for me to understand the situation better?

Update: November 08, 2009.
It was a mutual split up. She had a new job, and just didn't fit around my life anymore as she was a student before and had more time. Thing that annoys me, is that the new guy looks nothing like me, probably nothing like me, and I feel because she met him at work, then that means she was liking him while we was still together. Will she be hurting, or does it seem she is over it already??

- Asked by An Intellectual Guy, Male, 26-28, London, Financial / Banking

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you have slept with women but are wondering why she has decided to move on too? You aren't together anymore so are both free to do as you please.

- Response by A Thinker, Female, 29-35, Who Cares?

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Community Rating: Community Star

It's going to take time. I know it's easier said than done, but try not to concentrate on her and her activities. Do you think she sitting and moping over you? Get out with your friends and try to enjoy yourself. Stay busy. A broken heart does hurt, but it won't be that way forever.

- Response by gumboyaya, A Career Woman, Female, 36-45, Law Enforcement

Rating Received:

"Can't fix normal." You were together 2+ years, you've been apart 2 months... It hurts, and it's going to take longer to heal.

BUT, you need to take care of yourself, knock of that "sleeping around" bullsh-t.

What you need to do is build healthy habits, apart from when you were living with and doing everything else with her.

You are young, you and she "grew up together" to an extent, and you habituated to her. Now, you just need to build new habits and a new routine... one that will survive the arrival and departure of another woman.

Stop contemplating anything about her, other than her absence.
The more brain space you give her, the longer you will be stuck in the rut of 'missing' her. And that is SO unattractive to a healthy woman.

- Response by cd92835, A Career Man, Male, 46-55

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I'm sorry you are hurting...your grief is normal, especially considering how much time you two had together.
Who broke off the r'ship?
Was it you? (did not understand that part).
You say, "so thought we'd break if off", after she started her new job and you two had different commitments.
Sounds like she is moving on...nothing wrong with's pretty normal as we humans desire companionship.
How to get over it, you ask?
Stay busy.
Surround yourself with good friends, take time to get out and meet new friends.
Be careful where you let your mind dwell.
Exercise and sunshine! :)

- Response by gettingstronger, A Cool Mom, Female, 46-55, Teaching

Rating Received:

Hi there,look its gona take time for you to get over your ex & by the sounds of it,youre not over her...Thats totally normal,you're hurting right now & you got to come to terms that your ex has moved on & dating someone else. Look,some women has a strange way of dealing with their break up's,that means they'd jump right into another relationship straight away just to get over the other & to hurt the ex. The situation is that you should try & understand is,that when it is over,its over. Move on and deal with it... You wil see in time and before you kn6w it,you wil be over her.

- Response by tylersoap79, A Thinker, Female, 29-35, Self-Employed

Rating Received:

You're old enough to know the real truth about breakups: nothing just ever comes out of nowhere. Either something's been off awhile and you missed it; or she's met someone but wasn't telling you but now that the new guy is ready to move, you're history. She didn't move on faster, she just went with the one who interested her more. Anyone who jumps like this has already vetted the new interest and decided that they want to get to know them better so they dump the old one and move to the new. Smart women rarely follow a relationship with another guy exactly like their ex, it's counter intuitive to dating. Don't waste time wondering and trying to figure it out, just accept it and move on.

- Response by lioness21, A Player, Female, 29-35, Consulting

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It sounds like you feel rejected, instead of "not being over her." You already slept with more than 1 woman, so you obviously didn't consider her feelings there. Think about how you're really feeling. Do you feel rejected? Or do you still care for her?

- Response by luckyflower, A Trendsetter, Female, Who Cares?, Who Cares?

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Try to wish her well. She is trying to move on. You obviously moved on enough to sleep with other women. You can't expect to have one standard for yourself and another for your girlfriend!

- Response by lesque, A Thinker, Female, 56-65, London, Other Profession

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