Back to Home

Active Questions

Have you ever asked someone out for a date, only to have them reject you?
Dating / 5:16 PM - Tuesday November 03, 2009

Have you ever asked someone out for a date, only to have them reject you?

How do you overcome this fear of being rejected and humiliated?

Update: November 03, 2009.
Thanks to all of those who responded. I really like this cute girl at my kickboxing class whom I've talked to a good few times and I want to ask her out but I have social phobia and I'm afraid of rejection and humiliation. I feel like I need to ask her out to overcome my fear but I'm afraid that if I see her again I'll just tense up and not go ahead with it.

- Asked by Male, 22-25

READ MORE ABOUT THE RATING SYSTEM


Don't take rejection so personally.

We'll all be rejected at some point in our lives, whether it be with a woman, applying for a job or even taking out a bank loan.

It's only humiliating if you let it be. Think of it as a learning curve - you screwed up....so next time change it up.

You learn more in defeat than if you win. The same applies to women.

Have I been rejected by a woman? Yes.

And looking back on it and how I acted around women 3-4 years ago, I would have rejected ME!

- Response by mantis, A Creative, Male, 18-21, London, Student

Rating Received:


Do'nt be humiliated.It has happend to us all.We just move on.

- Response by frenchkiss49, A Thinker, Female, 56-65, Tampa, Who Cares?

Rating Received:

Community Rating: Community Star

It's life. Men can be turned down from time to time, and women don't hear back from men we are interested in. We date and sometimes it doesn't work out.

I don't take it personally. I figure it is a numbers thing. Everyone has their own "type" so no point in taking it personally.

Just go to places, singles groups, places, online sites, and become friends with a few people. The timing, chemistry will be right with some and not with others. Just like not everyone is right for you.

Just go out and have fun. Your time, the right woman will come along. Don't worry about rejection and don't be humiliated. Everyone goes through it. As you get older, more experienced, it gets much easier.

If you wish join a support group for people in your age group. You can help/support each other.

- Response by lasuz, A Thinker, Female, Who Cares?, Los Angeles, Medical / Dental

Rating Received:


I wouldn't consider it so much as rejection as I would an indicator that I wouldn't have as much fun dating this person as I thought I would. Time to move on!

- Response by ddegon, A Married Girl, Female, 26-28, Washington, DC

Rating Received:


for somebody to decline your offer is not a world-shaking, heart-breaking, humiliation-soaked event. "would you?", you ask. "no, thanks.", she says. OVER. DONE. no need to anguish or angst.

simply move on as if nothing happened. after all, nothing happened, right?

- Response by two469, A Player, Female, Who Cares?, Cincinnati, Celebrity

Rating Received:


You're young. You'll be rejected again. And again. You'll get over it. Consider it her loss that she didn't get to know what a fabulous, wonderful person you are.

- Response by justme85206, An Intellectual Guy, Male, 46-55, Phoenix, Other Profession

Rating Received:


Sure. It is the hazard of dating. The simplest way according to an old friend was to walk up to an attractive gal, ask her, "your place or mine for a good boning?", and half would slap his face. The other half, well, that's the odds!!!

I have been rejected more than accepted. I just couldn't adopt that simplistic approach. Besides, probably like you, I had my heart in my hands approaching someone I liked. It seemed like I was asking for the major treasure of the world knowing that in one shot, I could win or lose.

Sure glad I got wise to it and just went forward as though it were a business deal, or shopping for a new car.

rek

- Response by rekkonball, A Guy Critical, Male, 66 or older, Retired

Rating Received:


Lighten up a little. It doesn't necessarily have anything to do with YOU. Maybe the person of her dreams has come along five minutes earlier - I literally stood a guy up the one and only time of my life because the night before our date, I met the love of my life. I still feel a little bad about it, but not too much because I knew that my husband was the one I was looking for, and going out with the other man was just wasting his money and my time. (My beloved and I have been married for 5 years now)

Take the attitude that she's missing a great opportunity if she doesn't go out with you, and ask somebody else.

- Response by bugdoc, A Thinker, Female, 36-45, Medical / Dental

Rating Received:


yep.
...next.

- Response by nysbikergirl, An Alternative Girl, Female, 46-55, Who Cares?

Rating Received:


Tell yourself you can not lose something you never had. She was not with you and still isnt. oh well; next. The stats say you have to ask 8 to ten out before you get a yes.

- Response by newnumbersguy32, A Mr. Nice Guy, Male, 36-45, Financial / Banking

Rating Received: