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Active Questions

Why do women stay with guys who treat them like shit?
Dating / 11:17 AM - Tuesday October 13, 2009

Why do women stay with guys who treat them like shit?

- Asked by augustbaby82, A Married Girl, Female, 29-35, New York, Financial / Banking

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Because they never learned to be independent before. They think a man completes them. They also think any man is better than no man. God, they couldn't be more wrong!!!!

- Response by youngfuddyduddy, A Married Girl, Female, 46-55, New York, Who Cares?

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Denial, it's not just a river in Egypt.


- Response by bluegenel, A Mr. Nice Guy, Male, Who Cares?, Technical

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Community Rating: Community Star

I think it's from a lack of confidence and security. Some women feel they're better off with a d*ck then being alone. They might think they can change him and when they find out they can't it's harder to get out of the relationship once they've put the time and effort into it. Maybe they think they don't deserve better and just settle for anything instead of nothing.

It's sad and I couldn't imagine living my life that way...

- Response by sweetnovember, A Thinker, Female, 36-45, Executive

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In my opinion it's because they think they can change him from the lying piece of sh*t that he is and have some kind of validation/victory OR they have f*cked up self esteem and think that's all they can find or deserve.

- Response by thottienc, A Career Woman, Female, 36-45, Who Cares?

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Well when you figure that out you will be able to right a book....I think at one time.....many years ago when the women didn't work as much they didn't have a days....I'm just not sure.......

- Response by lab01, A Father Figure, Male, 46-55, St.Louis, Other Profession

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They don't know anything else,, They think they can change them,, out of fear.

- Response by hands, A Creative, Male, 46-55, Hong Kong, Who Cares?

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because the guy puts them down so much that they begin to feel like they deserve this piece of shit man. And that they will not find anyone better. I dont care if you love someone you never let anyone treat you like shit. You have to take a stand and let the guy know your not going to take any of his ways he wants to be in total control and be in control of you but your a person not a game system paddle.

- Response by gossipgirl244, A Trendsetter, Female, 29-35

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change is hard.

To leave to admit.....that SHE picked the wrong guy in the first place..........which indicates failure.....SO......... ......she the hopes of continual effort may somehow............fix it.

- Response by nysbikergirl, An Alternative Girl, Female, 56-65, Who Cares?

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Low self-esteem.

- Response by hulagirl55, A Sportif, Female, Who Cares?, Who Cares?

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probably because there good in bed :)

Seriously though, they have low self esteem and they dont respect themselves. If you repect yourself you will NEVER put up with that kind of treatment!!

- Response by nodrama, A Cool Mom, Female, 46-55, Who Cares?

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AB, the way you asked this question makes it seem like "treating a girl like shit" is a bad thing. :) haha

- Response by kungfudewd, A Career Man, Male, 36-45, Who Cares?

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Sometimes....a woman's emotions go against her

- Response by mantis, A Creative, Male, 18-21

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they are trapped (sometimes).

- Response by mlcoast2, A Sweet Sarah, Female, 22-25

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coz we love them!

- Response by A Thinker, Female, 36-45, Medical / Dental

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Some women feel that it's better to have someone than be alone...I personally do not agree with that warped philosophy and am currently single. I don't love it but I won't be with someone who is unhealthy for me just to say I have someone.

- Response by cocoacurevelous, A Hip Hop Girl, Female, 46-55, Administrative

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A lot of people stay because they are terrified of being alone. It's not just women. My brother's g/f treats him like dirt and he stays and claims he loves her.

- Response by waitinggirl22, A Thinker, Female, Who Cares?, Los Angeles

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low self esteem period..

- Response by bittersweet2u, A Sweet Sarah, Female, 26-28, Atlanta, Medical / Dental

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Not sure why it is gender cuts both ways...unless you are suggesting that there are more men who treat their women like shit than vice versa.

As for why...I guess people just prefer the known, even if it sucks, to the unknown. Some are afraid they may never find someone else.

- Response by tomtomcat, An Intellectual Guy, Male, 56-65, New York, Teaching

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Maybe because they feel like shit. Peace. :)

- Response by mortaune, A Guy Critical, Male, 29-35, Student

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They think that at some point these men will 'change'.

They stay because they don't have a job, may have always been a stay at home mom, with very little to no education.......and certainly no money to leave or desire to leave them with just the clothes on their backs.

Sooooo many reasons........but they vary according to each individual

- Response by jpm51, A Thinker, Female, 56-65, Baltimore, Administrative

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many reasons.....low self esteem...embarrassment over ending the marriage......they dont have to work because the hubby makes tons of means of support for them and their sure a host of other reasons....

- Response by painless63, A Mr. Married Guy, Male, 46-55

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..a lot of people are in toxic relationships, whether it be "friendships", family, bf/gf..i know for me i didn't know what being liked was or being loved really..i was neglected as a child and teased unmercifully when i was a couldn't tell the difference between abuse and positive relationships..

- Response by michellekia, A Thinker, Female, 36-45, St.Louis, Financial / Banking

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Honestly my friend is going through the exact same thing, we just got off the phone with each other discussing the situation with her and her boyfriend. And it's pathetic, and I've seriously just stopped trying to tell her that she deserves better and he's simply not worth her time. How ever, she's very insecure, she's attached and way clingy. When she grabs on to someone regardless of how much they may mean to her, she can't let go. I'm not saying this is the case in all situations but for right now it is, and it's terrible because she knows that she should leave him but she can't. She feels as if she'd make a huge mistake, but in my opinion probably the best one yet.

- Response by mel01234, A Creative, Female, 22-25, Toronto, Medical / Dental

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most likely raised in a single mother household without a strong positive male role model. A man father teaches them about what a real man is like and also how a real man treats a women (their mother)

With no reference, they got no clue.

- Response by joecanada, A Guy Critical, Male, 22-25, Regina, Construction

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