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My neighbor kissed my husband last night.....should I be pissed?
Sex & Intimacy / 5:20 PM - Monday October 12, 2009

My neighbor kissed my husband last night.....should I be pissed?

We were all drinking heavily & at their house - she & the gals hang out downstairs
and the guys are always upstairs

She got drunker than the past 2 times we've been over there (They just moved in 2 weeks ago...so maybe it's usual?)
She was mad at her husband & was going on & on about what an asshole he is & telling us how long it's been since she's had sex. (over a year!)
She asked me what I thought of her having an affair with out lawn maintenance guy....
I only pointed out that one of her complaints about hubby is that he smells...imagine what the lawn guy smells like
I listened, but didn't say much - I'm a newlywed & have no complaints - just joked that I hope she didn't hear us thru the condo walls - because we have very loud sex...very often!
I tried to keep the conversation light & joked mostly

When we were leaving - she borrowed my husband's cigarette from his mouth (with her hand) because her husband doesn't like her to smoke, so she thought it would piss him off.
Then as she was leaving our garage...she gave me a bye hug
Gave my husband a bye hug...and a goodnight kiss.
I didn't even see it - I was headed into the house...
He said "did she kiss you too? Foreign chicks are weird with all their hugging and kissing"

Should I be upset with her?
I trust him completely & I kinda think I should just forget about it
But maybe in casual conversation? Just mention it to her?? & say that it's not appropriate in this country to kiss someone's husband??
Or will it make me look jealous?

Update: October 12, 2009.
It was a peck on the lips

- Asked by Vickey69, A Married Girl, Female, 36-45, Who Cares?

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On all sides, it'd be best to let it go, but to keep a somewhat watchful eye on her in the future. After all, this is a woman who has expressed an interest in committing an act of infidelity. Drunk or not--alcohol doesn't put words in your mouth, it usually unhinges your inhibitions and makes you more truthful.

There'd be nothing to gain by playing the high testosterone angry female role--"He is MY man," etcetera. Let's reserve that behavior for MTV reality shows and self-important college kids from the suburbs. Adults handle matters with a certain sense of decorum.

In America we have a tendency to take the nuances of our relationships a bit too seriously.

If, in the future, she takes it too far, I'd discuss the matter with her when she's sober. See where it goes from there.

- Response by tactforwit, A Mr. Nice Guy, Male, 18-21, New York, Artist / Musician / Writer

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It doesn't matter how you look to her. If you're not okay with it then speak up. I am always very clear about what other women can and cannot do to MY man. Basically all they can do is talk.

lol! call me bitchy, jealous. whatever. the bottom line is he is MINE. not yours lady. back up when i say to or you're gonna get hurt.

- Response by kagurahime, A Thinker, Female, 26-28, Student

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Community Rating: Community Star

None of it was innocent...she was preparing you. If she will do that in your face what will she do behind your back?

Innocent is a cheek kiss really with just the cheeks touching not actually kissing another woman's husband...but be careful on this...when I tell my husband what women will try...including things like this he thinks I don't trust him to handle it...when I am really pointing out that women will try stupid shit like this just to see if the guy bites.

Next thing there will be photos of it on facebook and he is totally clueless...I have learned to let him bring loose women't gestures to my attention...then he feels like he has handled it properly...lol. Men and their egos.

- Response by clip22, A Career Woman, Female, 36-45, Executive

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Just let it go....see what happens....if she does it again politely tell her that isn't appropriate and not to disrespect you again.
I'm sure she didn't mean anything by it, but just be careful especially if she is bad mouthing her husband.

- Response by lasttrueromantic, A Creative, Female, 36-45, Teaching

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I'd say to forget it, but watch out for her in the future. Downgrading her husband makes her should make you suspicious about her intentions. Chances are she meant nothing, but I think your husband should be ready next time and refuse the kiss if it's offered.

- Response by poolfish2, A Career Man, Male, 66 or older, Who Cares?

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Play dumb ,...then casually tell her about the Bitch at the last party who layed one on your man, tell her that the skank ended up needing stitches!

- Response by cinders717, A Sweet Sarah, Female, 36-45, Who Cares?

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I would mention it to her because she has already told you she has not had sex for a year and is upset with her husband. That might night have been such an innocent hug and kiss. I think it is important that she knows you know she did this and that your husband will tell you whatever she does in the future.

- Response by dreamdancer, A Creative, Female, 29-35, Houston, Other Profession

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Well I would probably keep my eye on her. It's obvious she doesn't have a good sense of boundaries. Something else that might help here is that you keep your bedroom life private. No sense in giving her something to lust after!

- Response by kdtxchic30, A Thinker, Female, 36-45, Who Cares?

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Keep your eye on her, or try not to hang out with her when she drinks. I may only be 20, but I've seen this too many times. My boyfriends mother drinks, and so do her friends. Often times she has these little parties and get together at her house and everyone drinks. Most of these women are in their late 30's to mid 40's. A couple of them have even said inappropriate things to my boyfriend or tried touching him inappropriately (he is only 21 & they are old enough to be his mother!) Sometimes these ladies bring their husbands along and needless to say I have seen one trashy wife try to hook up with another woman's husband!!

- Response by A Thinker, Female, 22-25

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why does anyone get jealous over things like this is beyond me

- Response by bigcurt, A Mr. Nice Guy, Male, 46-55, Pittsburgh, Self-Employed

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Your husband seemed completely baffled by it, so I think it was just her being drunk and lonely. I'd just maybe tell your husband to watch out for her (jokingly) when she's had a few... I think she was just being stupid and it sounds like you can trust your husband to act appropriately.

For now, I'd take it lightly. If it happens again, maybe talk to her about it.

- Response by snafu, A Career Woman, Female, 29-35, Toronto, Financial / Banking

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WTF why are you hanging out with trash like that?

And considering you're already filling them in on the intimate details of your sex life, they probably think you're cool with it.

I would tell her to get on the wagon, and not call you until she can keep her hands to herself, and then maybe find some higher caliber friends......

Sounds like something you'd hear about in a trailer park!

- Response by sharonpeters, A Thinker, Female, 29-35, Other Profession

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i see you never been down to CAJUN COUNRTY! thats all they do is kiss lolol

- Response by hotair, A Father Figure, Male, 66 or older, New Orleans, Transportation

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i would talk to her about it, then telll your husband to not really get close ne more

- Response by bhottl, A Hip Hop Girl, Female, 22-25, Philadelphia, Student

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Yes you should be upset with her because she has to understand that some people don't mind giving a hug after visiting, but there are also some people who don't feel 'comfortable' with kissing, no matter if it's a peck on the cheek or not...since she kissed your husband on the lips, it might be best for you to let her know that your husband was uncomfortable with her doing that because he is used to giving a hug or a handshake and 'kissing' him was inappropriate...put yourself in her place and see if she would like it if you did that with her husband and you will find that it is 'inappropriate' to kiss someone you barely know...you are showing her that she should respect you and your marriage and not overstep boundaries by doing things like that and let her know if it happens again, you will definitely address it as soon as it happens...she needs to quit trying to make trouble for herself and others by behaving as she did, drunk or not, it was not the right thing to do...:D

- Response by fastball, A Cool Mom, Female, 36-45, Edmonton, Student

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A simple peck, who cares?

We were over the neighbors and every one had left and me and him walk into the house to find his wife and mine making out, then stripping each other. Before I knew what was going on my wife was in the middle of a threesome with the two of them.

- Response by A Mr. Married Guy, Male, 36-45, Self-Employed

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