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How to tell a guy you want to be with him.
Dating / 11:14 PM - Thursday October 08, 2009

How to tell a guy you want to be with him.

There is this guy I met about 2 years ago. He told me a while ago he didnt want a relationship becuase he doesnt want to deal with the bs that comes along with one. Well the past month we have been spending all of our time together. I want to hint at him that Im starting to feel him more and ask if this is ever going to go anywhere with him. I want to do something cute for him. Please help

- Asked by A Thinker, Female, 26-28, Las Vegas

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Tell him however you want, but be prepared to be shot down and hurt. He has told you "no relationships". He said what he meant. While he likes spending time with you, he May not want wat you do.

- Response by roaminginsomniac, An Alternative Girl, Female, 46-55, Law Enforcement

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Well if he said he didn't want a relationship that's it until he changes his mind.

I suggest you date other guys and see if he reacts.

- Response by llafsroh, An Intellectual Guy, Male, 46-55, Boston, Science / Engineering

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I recommend against hinting at him. Look at it like this, if you drop hints and he wants a relationship, you could have gotten it by discussing it with him directly. If he doesn't want a relationship, he will resent the hint-dropping, which will hurt your friendship.

I suggest having a talk with him. Let him know that you're developing feeling for him and you want a deeper relationship with him. If he doesn't want a relationship, you should sharply curtail the time you spend with him...unrequited love is miserable, lemme tell ya. Let him know that BEFORE he answers...you're not trying to manipulate him, you're being straightforward with him--and if that's not the case, by the way, you're setting yourself up for a lot of heartache. Don't demand an answer right away, give him a few days to think it over. If he justs wants a friendship, he's going to have to respect your feelings, and let you have your time away from him.

I know it'll be hard to force yourself to occupy your time with something other than him, but by displaying that kind of self-respect and discipline, he'll probably end up having a lot more respect for you, whether he wants a romantic relationship or not. Most importantly, you'll prove to yourself that you aren't dependent on someone else's affection to be 'whole.'

And, there's always the possibility that he's changed his mind, and DOES want to move beyond friendship. Just remember that as much as you WANT a relationship with him, you don't NEED it. Stay strong, and good luck!

- Response by scott0001, A Guy Critical, Male, 36-45, Artist / Musician / Writer

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ask him straight out where you stand with him and where its going, tell him if its not going anywhere you want to go out and date other people and find someone who does want a relationship...see how he reacts to that, i think it will be good :)

- Response by searchingforanswers, An Alternative Girl, Female, 29-35, Dublin

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Ok, since I do not know the entire situation, I'm going tyo go off what you wrote. First I would think of godd a friendship you have with him and if if leads to a relationship ask yourself if you could go back to that friendship if it didn't work. Net, look at the kind of time you have been spending with him recently. Does he ask you to come "hang out" is he the one asking you "What are you doing?" If he is the one asking first, then its more likely than not that he is feeling more than friendship for you as well. My advice would be to tell him what you are you feeling and if nothing happens on the romantic side of it you still have your friend. Good luck to you.

- Response by helloonurse, A Married Girl, Female, 36-45, Las Vegas, Medical / Dental

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