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I am in love with my best friend's brother! What should I do?
Dating / 3:54 AM - Sunday October 04, 2009

I am in love with my best friend's brother! What should I do?

I have been close friends with my bff for only about 6 months, but we are great friends and spend a lot of time together. When we first started hanging out heaps, and before I even knew she had a brother, she had this big idea that she wanted to set the two of us up. Anyway she introduced the two of us a little while later and surprisingly I fell for him straight away! The only problem at that stage was that he was involved with another girl and my bff didn't know about her before she tried to set us up. As far as I can tell though, things didn't work out with the other girl. So my problem is now that I spend a lot of time at her house on the weekends and he is usually there too but I'm worried that if anything were to ever happen it would affect my friendship with my bff - even though the whole thing was her idea in the first place. Another big thing is that he is relatively shy / reserved and I don't know if he feels the same way! We all went out in a group the other night though and after we'd all had a few drinks he started to become quite affectionate and was giving me hugs throughout the night. I don't want to let myself get carried away though if it is something that won't ever work out. Help!!

- Asked by Female, 26-28

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Getting involved with a best friend's sibling will almost always put some strange tension on the friendship. What if you and him, give it a try, but it doesn't work out, so you break up? How would you ever be able to go hang out with her again? And how will she ever get any peace if the two of you get into some argument? She'll be hearing it from him, and naturally from you, because she's you're best friend. She be in the middle all the time. I've been in this situation, and it was cool at first.... then things got sketchy. Just be careful.

- Response by fortminor123, An Alternative Girl, Female, 22-25

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Community Rating: Community Star

My sister married her best friend's brother back in the 1960s. They are still together.

You selected your bff because you have a lot in common, and probably have a lot in common with her brother, shared values, similar family, etc. Go for it.

- Response by greenwind, An Intellectual Guy, Male, 56-65, Construction

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Hello!
I think that you should reconfirm with your bff if it would still be alright with her if you dated her brother - remember be very careful if you do end up going out with him because it could be risky because you wouldn't want to offend one or the other so you will have to have alot of balance with both relationships.

Anyway if she says that it would still be okay, then I think you should ask her to ask him if he likes you or anything and if he does - find ways to hang out with him even if it is in a group of friends going out for a couple drinks if that is what makes him more confident. It sounds like he likes you a bit even if it is just as friends.

Good Luck!

- Response by christinacream24, A Sweet Sarah, Female, 22-25, New South Wales

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