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Is my best friend justified for being mad at me for not attending her kids bday party?
Sex & Intimacy / 6:39 PM - Tuesday September 22, 2009

Is my best friend justified for being mad at me for not attending her kids bday party?

im 30 not married, and without kids. my bestfriend had her daughters 6th and sons 3rd bday party this weekend at the "Castle Park"
i was planning to go after i finished my prior engagements earlier in the day.....but i ended up with a terrible headache. being the party had already started i sent her a text message saying i was sorry i wasn't going to make the party becuase i had a terrible headache. but to call me tomorrow and let me know her schedule this week so i can come by to see her and the kids and bring my gifts.
today she sends me a message saying she is busy and honeslty doesnt want to talk to me.
is she right at being this mad at me for that? do i not understand becuase i dont have kids? and also i have never missed any other kids bdas or any other event for that matter. what is up with this!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

- Asked by nealleycat, A Thinker, Female, 29-35, Philadelphia, Medical / Dental

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Oh, christ. She's obviously one of these psychotic mothers who thinks the universe should implode because she shit out a couple of kids. Yeah - everyone's supposed to drop dead because it's her kids birthday....

She is being an unreasonable, whiney bitch. Having a bad headache is a perfectly legitimate reason for skipping a party that's going to be over run with with small shreiking children.

IMO, people shouldn't even *invite* childless adult friends to their kids' birthday parties! It's nothing but an excuse to score a gift anyway.

- Response by justpassingthru, A Thinker, Female, 56-65, Financial / Banking

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Community Rating: Community Star

That sounds awfully pissy of her, maybe she is moody lately and was looking forward to seeing you as well as the kids were hoping to see Auntie Nealleycat. I don't think she should be upset with you, things happen. Let her cool off and talk to her later this week to either drop by with the gifts or get together for lunch.

- Response by hulagirl55, A Sportif, Female, Who Cares?, Who Cares?

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No she is the one with the problem here. I have kids and would have thought it very generous of you to buy them gifts.

- Response by newnumbersguy32, A Mr. Nice Guy, Male, 36-45, Financial / Banking

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I have had parties for my kids.I was more interested in if thier friends came.If you had a headach she should have been more concerned about how you felt.She was rude.You cared enough to get presents and she should not been so harsh.

- Response by frenchkiss49, A Thinker, Female, 56-65, Tampa, Who Cares?

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well what you basically told her was that her kids are not high on your priority list....... HER KIDS..... who Im sure she LOVES MORE THAN ANYTHING ON THIS EARTH!!!! But she is being a DRama queen anyway....... She should shrug it off and Just not invite you to anything her kids are associated with..... which means ecventually she will hang out with someone else she can depend on when she's celebrating with her kids

- Response by boxer1, A Guy Critical, Male, 36-45, Self-Employed

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I don't invite single friends to my kids' b-day parties. Why should they have to shell out money for a gift if THEY don't have kids?

She's selfish and self-centered. You didn't blow her off, you contacted her AND you arranged to stop by to make it up to the kids. AND you bought them gifts.

Million bucks--I bet if YOU had a party and one of her kids got sick, that would be a good excuse, right?

You did nothing wrong.


- Response by myndseye711, A Thinker, Female, 29-35, Vladivostok, Celebrity

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Of course not.
You are her friend - not her kids.
She doesn't own you.

And if you didn't feel well the last thing you needed was to be surrounded by a bunch of screaming running kids (I have an 9 and a 3 year old and that's what they do@ scream, run, fight and mess up the house - they make my head spin and I have had a few years to get used to kids :)))

Two kids is hard enough but having a house full of kids at a party - that's a mad house, trust me.

If she wanted a helper at a party she should have asked one of her friends with the kids who knows how to handle kids.

It was perfectly reasonable to suggest to meet them all the next day (minus a gazilion kids)

- Response by rubyrednotdead, A Creative, Female, 29-35, Who Cares?

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You should never have accepted the invitation if you had prior engagements to attend.

It was a slap in the face to a woman who ASSUMED she was MORE than JUST a friend to you.

I have no kids either, and MY best friend had her kids' birthday parties and CHUCKIE CHEESE!!!! You ever been to Chukie Cheese???? If you don't have kids, it's an experience.

But I went because I promised I would.

You did what you wanted to do, went to the parties you WANTED to go to, and as far as your friend is concerned? (It's not what you DID it's how it was PERCEIVED!!!)

You blew her off. HER kids party wasn't important to you. You had a "headache" so you blew her kids party off.

You owe that woman a huge apology. And make this the LAST TIME you use the bullshit "I have no kids" excuse for blowing her off. It's offensive.

- Response by hnygrl, A Career Woman, Female, 46-55, Managerial

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