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Why do people let themselves go once they're in relationships?
Dating / 5:52 AM - Saturday August 01, 2009

Why do people let themselves go once they're in relationships?

Not always, but much too often in my opinion. Most women just think, wow, I'm married, time to break out the sweatsuits, quit wearing makeup and gain,like 300 pounds. Once you're married and life gets dull and routine, don't you think that's the best time to take even MORE care of yourself to keep the spark flying? Just saying.

- Asked by kasialace51, A Trendsetter, Female, 29-35

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I agree with you. But it's not just after MARRIAGE that makes someone start to let themselves go- its after being in a long term relationship. When my boyfriend and I first started dating he would work out all the time and always wear jeans and a nice shirt. Now that we have been together for almost 2 years he has stopped exercising completely and usually lounges around in sweatpants and a tee shirt. I, on the other hand STILL take the time to do my hair and make up, and I still work out 3-4 times a week like in the beginning of our relationship. Hell, just the other day I went shopping for some lingerie to suprise him with!!

- Response by A Thinker, Female, 22-25

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How old are you????You sound more like a teeen ager than a grown woman. In your opinion woman don't take care of themselves after theyy are married????Well, Honey, you had better look around at teh wolrd today...Maybe if you got out more and see what married woman REALLY looked like you wouldn't have that opinion. And what about the men after marriage????????

- Response by barbb, A Thinker, Female, Who Cares?, Chicago, Other Profession

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I agree with you. It seems to me that staying in shape and attractive is important to a marriage. People always talk about "working at your marriage" and everyone automatically thinks that's about communication and compromise. Absolutely. But working at being physically attracted to each other is equally important. When people get married and basically stop having sex, which is relatively common, what do you expect to happen? You drift apart.

A lot of people try harder when dating because your options are still open. If the significant other is disinterested, they can easily break up with you and leave. The perception is that marriage is "it." You dated all your life, then you got engaged, now you're married, end of story. So there's no real need to keep going crazy for the other person. You both relax and start letting things go.

Actually, what's worse is when one person stays in shape and the other person doesn't. Typically, that's the woman, but typically that's because the woman gets pregnant. Now, I have total sympathy for women because getting pregnant DOES destroy your body. On the other hand, when women say that "the only reason stars get thin again after pregnancy is because they have all day to do it," that's false. I know LOTS of women who live everyday lives, got pregnant, just watched their diet and exercised, and lost the baby weight fairly rapidly. It's natural to lose the weight, but most people get into the mode of not exercising and eating for two, so what do you expect?

If I married a woman and she let herself go, I'd feel pretty ripped off. That may tick off the women here, but I'm just letting you know that.

- Response by istillhatescreennames, A Mr. Nice Guy, Male, 66 or older

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Kids come first - without kids - no matter whether you look fat or glam - there is no future for human race.

And to be honest, too much emphasis is put on the way women look - what about the men? Have you seen some rough looking men with beer guts STILL chatting up young slim gorgeous women AND giving them attitude!!!!!

It's not about looks - it's about how people get on with each other. Believe me if it was all about looks - men would NOT have one night stands with gorgeous women - they'd stay with them forever and ever.

But they move on if the woman has no substance or they don't get on.

The looks maybe the first what attracts them to a woman but it's not what makes a guy stay, trust me.

And if he falls in love - he falls deep. And the kids they share only bring them closer.

Weight you can lose easy, shallow mind, ignorance and selfish nature is a lot harder to lose.

- Response by rubyrednotdead, A Creative, Female, 29-35, Who Cares?

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yep, once you have kids they come first, and feeding the husband (he gets a little thicker around the waste too - it's a fact of life! Kids come, people work extra hours to make more money to support the kids, stress, tiredness, eating late at night, all the extra chores.... if the husband helps)

if people didn't sacrifise something - they wouldn't have kids and without kids there's like - no more people on this planet! so come one! If you're single and want more glamorous parents around - muck in, volunteer some free baby-sitting, help with housework - a good training for your own future family life AND I'll give you a letter of recommendation.

be my guest!


- Response by rubyrednotdead, A Creative, Female, 29-35, Who Cares?

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