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I have been dating this guy for 9 months when can I expect the official girlfriend title?
Dating / 2:47 PM - Tuesday June 16, 2009

I have been dating this guy for 9 months when can I expect the official girlfriend title?

I have been dating this amazing guy for about 9 months now, he is the proverbial mythic "good guy" he opens doors for me and above all owns his own stuff i.e: a house, a corvette and a benz. We both came out of really long term relationships. I do not have the official title of "Girlfriend". We are monogamous to each other and not dating other people, should I wait for it or ask him what's going on. Am I wasting my time?

- Asked by A Career Woman, Female, 29-35

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Personally at your age -- I would not rock the boat. I would not bring it up. I would not press for a title. If everything is great -- don't poke a stick at it. Leave it alone and let the relationship continue to blossom at the correct pace.

(After dating for two complete years would be a time to explore future commitments and possible engagement.)

- Response by utahmom, A Thinker, Female, 56-65, Managerial

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I like how you casusally mention the corvette and the benz...

*rolls eyes*

- Response by rollinhigheh, A Life of the Party, Male, 36-45, Who Cares?

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Community Rating: Community Star

Has he already introduced you to his parents ? or to his friends? When you're together does he call you "babe" "darling" and some of the kind?, if he has done all that already, you shouldn't worry, perhaps he doesn't like that word at all. Because he might hold a kind of superstition attached to it. Perhaps from the moment he called his ex- "girlfriend"- she behaved differently, and he may not want to spoil the magic relationship he might be enjoying with you. And if he's all nice with you, treat you with respect and all that, then the "title" of girlfriend shouldn't really matter if he behaves with you as if you were his girlfriend.

If his parents live near but never introduced you to them, nor to his friends or hold your hand in public places and all that, then you should really worry, then you might be really losing your time.

- Response by selenne, An Alternative Girl, Female, 29-35, Home Maker

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You might want to pick up "the rules" and don't you dare tell him. It is essentially a silly book, but it will teach you how to tell a serious guy from a casual guy. It will also tell you how to act like a lady who any good man would want to call a girlfriend or a wife. It's not about being a gold-digger or how to manipulate a man into taking are of us. It's how to take care of ourselves and thrive in a committed relationship. I hope you both find true love~

- Response by nofreksho, A Trendsetter, Female, 36-45

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9 MONTHS!!! You could of had a baby by now!! I think you should a confirmation of what your 'title' is from him, otherwise maybe it's time to throw him back into the ocean.

- Response by poisonrogue, An Alternative Girl, Female, 29-35, Who Cares?

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If he hasn't called you his girlfriend by 9 months, he doesn't want to.

- Response by An Alternative Girl, Female, 18-21

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9 months? well either he isn't saying anything becuase a title doesn't mean anything to him. if he likes you he will stay with you. Heck 9 months is long. If he wasn't itnerested he'd be gone by now. If it bothers you then you bring the topic up. Just ask him. "Hey it's been 9 months since we've been dating, have we always been a title or are we still on a friendship level?" You don't know til you ask

- Response by gaffb, A Sweet Sarah, Female, 26-28, Toronto, Administrative

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"and ABOVE ALL owns all his own stuff: a house, a corvette, a benz"

If the stuff he has ranks above all to you, it would explain why you don't have a commitment after nine months.

- Response by vabyss, An Intellectual Guy, Male, 36-45, Who Cares?

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If you are both happy with how things are going right now, maybe you could just go with the flow. If you really need to know your status with him, just casually ask, while playing around with him being flirtatious, say "so can I officially call you my boyfriend yet?"
If you say it in a playful manner, it doesn't come on too strong (where it could scare him away). It also let's him know it's been on your mind. If he's not ready to answer it yet, he will be thinking about it more.

- Response by boudoirnovelties, A Thinker, Female, 29-35, Consulting

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If you were MY age I would have said ASK and find out where you stand before you lose too much time, but at your age just enjoy the ride and see where it goes. At least you are exclusive and not dating other people which in my book means you are his gf anyway.

Do you see him pretty much every weekend? And at least once or twice during the week? Does he introduce you to friends and family? Talk about the future? Ask you to go on trips with you. tell you he wants you to meet his mom? if so, then his is IN!

Just don't get too caught up in him being well off (ie having a benz and a corvette and being a home owner). He may think you are only after his money if you act like that is very important to you and openly brag to your friends about it. And nothing will scare a guy off faster than that.

- Response by silver75, A Thinker, Female, 36-45, Stockholm, Other Profession

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After 9 months of dating, this guy should be more than able to put a "label" on it. If you two have been together this long already, you shouldn't have anything to be nervous about when bringing it up. You need to know that he values you and takes the relationship seriously.

You two need to establish the relationship or else you'll never be able to talk about anything of substance. Being his girlfriend doesn't mean you're engaged, not by a LONG shot. So he really should be able to have this conversation with you if he values you AT ALL as a person, as a friend, or as a romantic interest. 9 months is a long time. Don't let it get to a year before you two have this conversation.

- Response by becky3000, A Creative, Female, 26-28

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doesn't someone like to brag...

- Response by jess_412, A Thinker, Female, 26-28, Medical / Dental

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