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My boyfriend cheated on me with his ex-
Sex & Intimacy / 2:14 AM - Friday May 22, 2009

My boyfriend cheated on me with his ex-

My boyfriend's ex came back into the picture, she calls him many times per day begging him to take her places (like movies and stuff), which he did, while telling me he was with friends. When I sent him breaking up email after that, he went and slept with her. He told me, he thought, he lost me. She sent me bunch of nasty things in her email to me, so then he "broke up" with her for that. Could he be playing us both, or just teaching me "to trust him and not be so controlling" (his words). I am affraid, if I back off, he will be right back with her, but they don't get along, as she is "controlling crasy bitch" (his words). We were so happy toghether before. What should I do?

- Asked by Female, 36-45

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The fact is that he went back to her and had sex with her. This is the action of a relationship which is NOT dead.

She will continue to the THE THREAT for you, if you continue to be in HIS life.

He is not finished for some reason and this is NOT uncommon. The most oftenly cheated with women, are the EX's. That is why we need to ask so many questions when it comes to this subject, if we realize someone DID HAVE ONE.

I say bail out now. It is nothing but disappointment ahead. He is like a married man telling you all the bad things about his wife, but he stills goes home to her at night.

If these EX gals were so bad (as the guys describe) they would never go back to thema again; but they do! Why? That is not our job to figure out but it is up to us to protect ourselves by realizing when IT IS NOT OVER. :(

- Response by randyl, A Thinker, Female, 46-55, Los Angeles, Who Cares?

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i feel for you because mine did that to me and i had to end it 2 days ago because i will never be able to trust him ever again.
for me, i dont want any man that wants any other women, if he loves me then he will stop this nonscence with any other women, if he doesnt then I need to move on and not get kicked around, good luck to you.

- Response by A Trendsetter, Female, 46-55, Who Cares?

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What should you do? Nothing. He cheated on you and justified it by making it seem like it was your fault. Then he broke up with her (again) making it seem like her fault. And this is someone you still want?

- Response by alicjohns9, A Career Woman, Female, 46-55, Los Angeles, Financial / Banking

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Oh yeah, he used your break up email as an excuse to sleep with her. He obviously said some mean and nasty things about you to her so she felt justified to get you to back away. Sleeping with an ex to teach someone a lesson is bologna. He is playing you both and if you do back off, he will go where he wants to go. I know from experience that once you do back off and not get involved with the drama he will come running back. Don't lower yourself down to her level and don't respond to her emails. I had a very similar incident happen to me about 2 years ago. The x would write me about everything she could think of and I replied maybe 5 times to explain my side. He told me it was my fault she made me feel so bad with all her emails and lies (he said) because I read her emails. I believed her and not in him. (That is a whole other Oprah)If he is a good man he would not have to feel like he needed to teach you a lesson. He is not a healthy person to be involved with. Good luck

- Response by riccihopes, A Sweet Sarah, Female, 46-55, Los Angeles, Food Service

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He slept with her to get back at you.
I would not take a scum bug back for anything. He will do the same to you if you have problems again.
He is not worth it. Let him alone and find a better bf.
My feeling.

- Response by amandasboy, A Father Figure, Male, Who Cares?, Other Profession

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you've already done what you should. He is trying to manipulate you by turning this on you. He lied to you, went out with and ex girlfriend and then slept with her immediately after you broke up with him yet, he wants you to trust him. He's playing both sides and you are better off cutting your losses and walking away. I'm assuming he is near your age and not 17, like he is acting. That is just wayyyy too imature for a man to behave.

- Response by joent612, A Thinker, Female, 36-45, Tampa, Administrative

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