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What should I do about my sister stealing all my dad's money using a power of attorney?
Family & Parenting / 10:02 AM - Monday May 11, 2009

What should I do about my sister stealing all my dad's money using a power of attorney?

My sister cashed in and spent over $150,000, and also didn't pay any taxes on it. Now Dad has nothing but his social security check, and owes $50,000 in credit cards and $30,000 to the IRS. Dad is now living with her. I said my sister should turn over his S.S. to me to save for any unexpected expenses Dad may have, and she should provide housing and food to help make up for her theft. My mom and brother originally agreed with me, but now have been worn down by her bullying. Yesterday they said that they would be willing to let her keep his S.S. checks to spend as she sees fit so that we could have a happy family again. I am in disbelief. I think she has been more than amply compensated already and I don't think she should continue to take all his money. I also don't want to lose my family though. Any advise would be appreciated. Thank you.

Update: May 11, 2009.
Thank you for your response. It is a sad day when you discover you can't trust your family members even. Sometimes I wish life came with instructions.

- Asked by Female, 36-45

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I would contact a lawyer that is a missuse of power of attorney. And frankly I would have her prosicuted. I think that would be illegal. Power of attorney is used to help take care of him not exploit him.

Why does she have power of attorney. If he is this especially horrific. You should also go to any law office or court house and have her power of attorney removed. I understand you don't want to loose your father but look at what she has doen to your father. His checks should go to his debts and make her pay for all his expenses until she takes care of her theft.

- Response by bellabyrdie, A Thinker, Female, 29-35, Who Cares?

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That's sad. I really don't have any good advice for this. Unfortunately, my mom got axed financially by my brother too. However, I do believe in a fair and just God. Whatever they have taken away, it will be taken away from the eventually...someway..s omehow. No one gets a free ride on this life.

- Response by maxxfighter, A Career Man, Male, 36-45, Financial / Banking

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One thing you didn't address in your question is how does your father feel about all of this? Is he in any position/condition to revoke that power of attorney? Kind of like closing the barn door after the horse is gone, but perhaps that could prevent future abuses.

Speaking of abuses, you should try to find out if there is an agency in your area that deals with elder abuse, because this sounds like it certainly qualifies.

You may not be in a position to do so, but you should also consider taking your father in yourself since you don't really know how far the abuse goes with your sister. I hate to say it, but perhaps the abuse doesn't end with the financial matters (you mentioned bullying of the rest of the family).

You should also investigate the IRS angle. It sounds like your father is in trouble with them because the investments were cashed out, but your sister could also be in trouble if she spent his money on her own expenses. It may qualify as income to her and if she has not declared it she would be in trouble, too.

Good luck with this. Remember, elder abuse is as much a crime as child abuse is.

- Response by casablanca1, A Thinker, Female, 46-55

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