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What does it mean when a guy says; "I want to be with you , but I can't date you right now" . ?
Dating / 3:52 AM - Saturday April 25, 2009

What does it mean when a guy says; "I want to be with you , but I can't date you right now" . ?

This guy I've kinda been dealing with for a while and I finally had the relationship talk .. and all he said was , ' i want to be with you , i don't want you to see other people - and i'm not going to see other people .. but i can't date you right now . He says he's too busy for a girlfriend but he works 4 hours a day , 4 days a week .. and does nothing else . My girlfriends think he's just scared of commitment , but if he's not going to see anyone else - why doesn't he want the label to go along with the relationship ? & he's had girlfriends in the past , .. I don't understand it .

Update: April 25, 2009.
Honestly , I seem too hard on him reading back - I mean when we do go out or run into friends of his , he doesn't introduce me as just another friend - he says like , " my girl " or something along those lines . He irritates me with the holding out on the actual official terms of dating , and the label of boyfriend/girlfriend .. because his only excuse was that he gets too busy and can't be held responsible if he couldn't hang out with me for a week . I would understand that much - but I just feel like he's waiting for something more , but he said he's not sleeping with other girls , and he's not with other girls at the bars and stuff , even when I'm not there , my friends know who he is and would let me know if he was fooling around behind my back . I just don't think he thinks I'm good enough to be concidered a girlfriend.

- Asked by melissababiee, A Sportif, Female, 22-25, Toronto

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It means that he wants you on his time and when he wants you for his prupose not giving any thoughts as to your needs and happiness?? How shallow can he be and why is it all about him and his needs?? My lady just gently kick his butt to the curve and never be taken for granted or be second to no-one ,you deserve much better than this guy!!Dont ever let any guy hold all the cards and not think about what you want and How you feel!!

- Response by ptawillis, An Intellectual Guy, Male, 56-65, Medical / Dental

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Quite simple.....

It keeps his options open.....and availability.....

- Response by richard77, A Jock, Male, Who Cares?, Self-Employed

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he's hanging you in the back of the closet- like an orange sweater- just in case.
"Scared of commitment" is a term young women use when they don't get it and can't accept the reality of the man they are interested in-
when a man wants to commit-truly wants to- there is NOTHING that can get in his way.
Make yourself available to others and don't sleep with ANYONE right now- his intentions will become very clear...and don't BUG him to date you-sheeesh-
don't call him or text him or any of that...he needs to do the work, if only so that he can get it clear in his own mind.
Don't settle for this, truly, don't put yourself into this second and third tier ranking.
Good luck- be strong- this is important for you to learn.

- Response by milfinmpls, A Thinker, Female, 46-55, Minneapolis, Who Cares?

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I've heard this one before from a guy needless to say things didn't work out because he got back with his ex. Stop playing second fiddle you deserve more than this "guy" has to offer. He just doesn't know how to tell you that he's full of it.

- Response by A Thinker, Female, 29-35, Artist / Musician / Writer

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in plan english, he is full of crap.

- Response by angie1947, A Creative, Female, 66 or older, Retired

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