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Does a guy like you if he's using "pet" names?
Dating / 4:14 PM - Monday April 20, 2009

Does a guy like you if he's using "pet" names?

I've been talking to this guy via text and instant messaging throughout the day for three weeks. He doesn't like to talk on the phone and we've hung out once, 2 1/2 weeks ago. He is constantly calling me by pet names, always different, and usually right before we call it a night. Peaches, pumpkin, suga, luva, and babacakes are a few usually followed by a sweet dreams or a request for me to text him the next day. He still hangs out with his ex and tells me when he is, yet has only gone out with me once. I can't tell if he thinks of me as a pal who keeps him entertained when he's bored or if he's into me... help?!

- Asked by Female, 29-35

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if he still hangs out with an ex he's looking for a secondary piece of ass...from either of you...

- Response by rollinhigheh, A Life of the Party, Male, 36-45, Who Cares?

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Community Rating: Community Star

Just come out and ask him if he's in to you or not...nothing wrong with being friends but you obviously want more so find out what are his intentions and go from there so you aren't wasting your time or getting your feelings hurt. It's good to be honest so you know where you stand.

- Response by lasttrueromantic, A Creative, Female, 36-45, Teaching

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If he had one special name for you, perhaps, but a man who's got a million pet names is a man that uses them on every woman he meets. I've known these men. The waitress is "sweetie"... the bank teller is "honey."

Proceed with caution.

- Response by southjerseygirl, A Thinker, Female, 46-55, Administrative

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Nahhh the use of pet names doesn't necessarily mean he truly likes you.

Sure some men go into the squishy pet name zone when they feel really comfortable with a woman and really like her HOWEVER there are some men who use the pet names (especially early on) to avoid calling you by the wrong name or to fill the blank in their mind if they can't remember your name in the moment. What better cover for "okay talk to you later uuuh uhhh uhhh" is there than "okay talk to you later sweetheart"?

Go by what he does, not what names he happens to call you on any given day. The texting-only thing would've run its course for me by now...moving on.

- Response by surrealoptimism, A Creative, Female, 29-35

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It depends on if he addresses all females the same way. It could just be a habit. If it's JUST YOU, it's a term of affection and he likes you. If his actions don't match his words, I wouldn't look too deeply into it. Is he asking you out? Is he making time for you? Do you hang out with him and his friends? If the answer to all these question is a yes, then he's interested in YOU and not using you as a form of entertainment.

- Response by sugarlump, An Alternative Girl, Female, 29-35, Artist / Musician / Writer

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I think that he likes you because if he didn't he wouldn't be contacting you at all. However, I do think you are reading too much into the pet names thing. I don't think it really means anything at all. I wouldn't read too much into anything at this point. 3 weeks is too soon to expect much of anything. I also think that hanging out with his ex is a RED FLAG. I think that it shows that he still has a connection to her and it could mean that he isn't over her. If I were you, I would go slow and see what happens. He may see you as a pal, or more, only time will tell that. I think it is too soon for you to have that discussion, give it a little more time, then if you want to know, ask.

- Response by iamboo2, A Thinker, Female, 46-55, Charlotte, Therapist

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My opinion would be that he's into you, otherwise he wouldnt waste his time texting you all the time and calling you pet names. Did he recently break up with his ex? If he's still hanging out with he's still hanging out with her, maybe he's still trying to sort through the breakup and is therefore unsure if he wants to start anything with you? You can always suggest that you meet up for drinks or coffee and keep it casual while you figure out his intentions.

- Response by curiousss, A Trendsetter, Female, 29-35, Toronto

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If a guy is in to you, he'll want to see you as much as he can. Texting and IM is fine during the day but if he doesn't call you during the evening then you'd better not get too attached. A guy will make time for things he likes....whether it's a sport, hobby, girl, etc.

- Response by patriotblue, A Father Figure, Male, 36-45, Technical

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Ok listen to me very carefully ok. He's just not that into you. Any man that doesn't want you to call him is hiding something. Regardless of his excuse trust me I have been in a similiar situation. I'm sure he likes you but you are only entertaining him via text to flatter his ego. He is hanging out with his ex come on any man that really likes you will not hangout with anyone but you!!! He would want to talk on the phone to you & wouls want to see you. Trust me!! I'm sorry but your wasting your time & think if he's hanging out with his ex how much of an ex is she really? I think he just don't want to get caught up. Drop him you can find the right one when your hanging out & on to the wrong one. No matter what your attraction or connection, any man that can't give you his undivided attention, his time, or a phone call is not worth it, & it means your not the only one.

- Response by crazy1722, A Thinker, Female, 29-35

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