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What do you think of people who can't be alone & must be in a relationship to be 'happy?'
Dating / 3:59 PM - Tuesday March 17, 2009

What do you think of people who can't be alone & must be in a relationship to be 'happy?'

My favorite cousin is like this. She must have a boyfriend or she isn't happy. She is the type of person who bases her happiness on whether or not she has a boyfriend. I find her need to constantly be in a relationship irritable. She has found herself in plenty of abusive & terrible relationships b/c of it. I think her inability to love herself/her fear of dealing with her own personal problems with the males figures in her past has something to do with it. Why do you think some people become like this? What do you think will finally encourage them to change?

- Asked by poeticlove08, A Thinker, Female, 22-25, Student

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Yep, you got part of it already---your cousin most likely has self-esteem/lack of confidence issues. Furthermore, she most likely doesn't have a strong sense of identity, either-she probably doesn't know who the hell she is as a person. So therefore, it scares her senseless to be on her own, by herself...with a person that she barely knows.

- Response by A Hippie Chick, Female, 29-35, Teaching

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i think they are highly social people, that take being alone like a prison sentence. personally, give me a deserted island, and a fridge full of drinks and i'm happy.

and yes, those type of people accept ANY person instead of the ONE just to NOT be alone. it is sad. but they are lonely and feel terrible alone. i think if they have enough true friends that treat them right, never betray them and always are there for them, they come out of their needy little shell.

- Response by pizzatroll, A Mr. Nice Guy, Male, 46-55, Science / Engineering

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divorce.

- Response by getfukkd, A Guy Critical, Male, 26-28, Other Profession

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a lot of people are like that and I feel sad for them because often the comprimise who they really are to be in a relationship
or they are abusive to keep a relationship
and to be depended on sucks

it is a sad thing

- Response by morningdust, A Creative, Female, 56-65, Self-Employed

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People like this..don't usually have hobbies and can't entertain themselves because they're just boring people. They're the type who if they find someone for good, all they do is brag about the many vacations they went on..that nobody cares about.

- Response by jillopo, An Alternative Girl, Female, 29-35

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I think they're fooling themselves, and setting themselves up for disappointment.

There's nothing wrong with being in a relationship, or even just hoping to meet a special someone. However, when someone expects a relationship to be their sole source of joy in life, they are putting WAY too much pressure on their s/o and the relationship will likely crumble.

- Response by saucywench, A Creative, Female, 36-45, Cincinnati, Other Profession

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I think she become to be like that for the reasons that you explain "I think her inability to love herself/her fear of dealing with her own personal problems with the males figures in her past has something to do with it"

Maybe when she realize that no matter how many guys she dates or how many boyfriends she has, she isn`t happy. Maybe when she matures she will change. Or maybe when someguy treat her like dirt or garbage.

- Response by scandia, A Thinker, Female, 36-45

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It's impressive that a girl as young as you has figured that out. Those people are sad. Dating them is a nightmare.

- Response by vabyss, An Intellectual Guy, Male, 36-45, Who Cares?

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I was almost killed (very abusive relationship with a dangerous man) to realize the blessing I had of living by myself. In being by yourself, you learn about God and what your real purpose in life is. Every time I moved into a new home, I got a new man. Now, I'm homeless but living with relatives (Thank you Jesus). What doesn't kill you doesn't make you stronger. It weakens the stupid YOU and creates a better YOU...if you learn from it.

- Response by A Life of the Party, Female, 46-55

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