Thank you for your many years of support. We want to share the news with you that after much consideration, will cease operations in its present format on October 15th. We appreciate your meaningful contributions over the years.
Back to Home

Active Questions

Would I still be considered a divorcee after my ex dies or would I be considered a widow...
Married Life / 5:12 PM - Wednesday March 04, 2009

Would I still be considered a divorcee after my ex dies or would I be considered a widow...

...a divorced widow? We've been divorced a long time and he is really struggling with his health, sad to say he may not be around much longer.

Seems like widows arent frowned upon like divorcees are in some circles.

Just wondering if anyone else has gone through this?

- Asked by Female, 56-65

Read more about the Rating System

Why does the title matter to you so much?
Is it a line you intend to use when you meet some new guy?
"hey, I'm a widow, not a divorcee, now kiss me"
I dont get it!

- Response by mstoronto, A Trendsetter, Female, 29-35

Rating Received:

nope, widow only goes to spiders and spouses. you will forever be a divorcee, in sickness and in health and after death when he dies.

an the majority of the civilized country does not feel less or frown on divorcess, hell, 1/2 the country is divorced.

- Response by mtusa007, A Rebel, Male, 56-65, Self-Employed

Rating Received:

Community Rating: Community Star

I was divorced three years when my ex-husband died. Our daughter was nine years old. You are not a widow. You are the ex. If you wanted the title "widow" you could have waited. Who knew he would pass so soon, though?
Labels like "widowed" or "divorced" have no bearing on us unless we choose for them to have weight. You are officially "single" so if anyone asks, let that be your answer. The rest of the story is purely on a need-to-know basis. When you sense someone is asking for details so they can be judgmental, dismiss them and move on. When you know someone well enough to anticipate their motives for asking for more details, then you can decide whether or not to provide additional information.
Walk tall, be proud, and know that you are an amazing woman in and of yourself. The context of a woman in relation to a man is irrelevant unless we choose otherwise. Thank the Suffregettes for that one.

- Response by cassarooni, A Sweet Sarah, Female, 36-45

Rating Received:

you'd be a divorcee

- Response by roneboy, An Intellectual Guy, Male, 36-45

Rating Received:

I would not consider you a widow. You lost your right to widowhood after you divorced your husband.

- Response by amandasboy, A Father Figure, Male, 66 or older, Atlanta, Retired

Rating Received:

I'm sorry. I think though that since you are divorced, you would be considered a divorcee. Anyone that I've ever known that is divorced and their ex died was not considered their widow.

- Response by ddn1958, A Sportif, Female, Who Cares?, Who Cares?

Rating Received:


In my eyes you are simply an unmarried woman. I make no other distinction. Certainly no one should frown upon you regardless of your marital status.

- Response by llafsroh, An Intellectual Guy, Male, 46-55, Boston, Science / Engineering

Rating Received:

No, you have to be married to the spouse at the time of death, in order to be a widow.

- Response by watbuttondoipush, An Alternative Girl, Female, 36-45, Financial / Banking

Rating Received:

divorced. neither are frowned upon as long as they are honest, in my opinion.

- Response by ready4sumfun, A Creative, Female, 36-45, Who Cares?

Rating Received:

Your divorced only can be a widow (hopefully not turning into a black widow)if you were married still at the time of his death.

- Response by melodyalise, A Thinker, Female, 36-45, Salt Lake City, Managerial

Rating Received:

everyone is divorced these days
thats society in America

- Response by vank356, A Guy Critical, Male, 56-65, Technical

Rating Received:

You are only a widow if you two were married.'s just your ex passing away....sorry for the loss anyway!

- Response by divatoonami, A Trendsetter, Female, 36-45, Administrative

Rating Received:

If you were still married when he died you wouln't still tell people you are married, would you? So you are a WIDOW. But more importantly, to the right person you are simply a woman. People in those "cirlces' you refer to aren't the kind of people you should be around. 46-55? Sounds to me you are a MATURE, EXPERIENCED woman. Go find some guy who's world you can still ROCK and he won't care what you status is and just me thankful for what you have to offer.

- Response by mrsmaster, A Thinker, Female, 56-65, Teaching

Rating Received:

You would be divorced, not a widow, as you severed that tie before he past, and so you could not be his widow.

- Response by dambreaker, A Father Figure, Male, 56-65, Retired

Rating Received:

Divorced. The only way you are a Widow is if your CURRENT spouse that you are Married to dies. I am a Widow- Not a Divorcee.
I'm sorry but I do take offense to a Divorcee trying to claim being a 'Widow' because her ex husband of numerous years passes away- while YOU are NOT his WIFE.
I was married to my HUSBAND for 20 years and was with him every day and with him every minute of every day through his entire battle with his illness, and he died next to ME- I had to wake up to a dead body next to me, and tell our $ young children when they woke up, and clean up the mess and plan the funeral and deal with the nightmare-
I never divorced my husband, never.
Sorry to be rough= but it is FAR from the same thing.

Yes, I understand pain of also losing someone close as the year before I lost my best friend, who happened to be male, we had been friends since High School. I also took care of him and took him to every Dr appointment, administered all his medications and cleaned all his open wounds and was the only one with him when he died during the night- but I'm not HIS WIDOW!
I was a grieving friend, period.

- Response by momharleyxl, A Cool Mom, Female, 46-55, Los Angeles, Self-Employed

Rating Received:

If you are divorced "before" he dies,then you're a divorcee.If you want the title "widow" then remarry before he dies.

- Response by bill1959, A Mr. Nice Guy, Male, 56-65, Retired

Rating Received:

I dont think some of you people on here should judge so much, and the one who "takes offense" to someone trying to claim the widow title...your full of shit....this who just ask a question you didnt have to be such a bitch, a simple no would have been good and for the one whos like, something about meeting new guys and say hey I am a widow now kiss be, what a bitch you are maybe she wanted to know for different reasons....I am saying this because I was trying to find out if my mom is my dads widow because they were recently divored before he passed and he had no will, so it left me and my sister as the ones to sort thru shit, she is being a complete backstabing bitch and if my mom was legally considered his widow see could put a stop to all the drama my sister is causing me and my I take offense to you people being bicthy to this woman who only asked a question because my mom is asking the same question herself....n bitch just cause you were there every second of every day does make you anymore special to your husband then my mom was to my dad, I 100% that my dad still love my mom more then a hell of alot of people maybe even more then your husband loved you.....I dont know you and you dont know me or my parents but I do know your being a bitch, n my dad loved my mom so much that no matter what she did is didnt matter cause his love was that deep......there wasnt a person my dad meet that he didnt like he could find the best in anyone in any situation, so no I dont think its wrong for an ex to ask that question....for heaven sakes she didnt say "well when my ex is dead I will be a widow" SHE ASKED A QUESTION!!!!!!! Lastly to the woman who asked this legal you wont be a widow, but by "Godly" standards you would be....because you said your wedding vows to ur ex and to God and it was til DEATH DO YOU PART, thats when your truly free from you marriage.

- Response by An Engaged Girl, Female, 29-35

Rating Received: