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Do you think it's acceptable for a 34 year old woman to date a 19 year old boy?
Dating / 8:12 AM - Thursday January 22, 2009

Do you think it's acceptable for a 34 year old woman to date a 19 year old boy?




- Asked by A Sweet Sarah, Female, 29-35, Who Cares?

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Let's see, when I was 31 I had an 18 year old boyfriend briefly. Of course it couldn't go anywhere but some thirty odd years later when I go home to Mass. I stop in his store and talk to him. He has been married now for years but he still gives me a tingle. No way would I try to start anything but I just like to see his cute face and say hello, how are you?

- Response by englishrose4945, A Life of the Party, Female, 66 or older, Miami, Alternative Medicine

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For me, No, thats kind of a big difference, at least for me! I'm sure its possible but i dont see it being a long term relationship.

- Response by lam0366, A Sweet Sarah, Female, 46-55, Administrative

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Are you the woman concerned? As you referred to him as a BOY, then no, I don't think it is. If you yourself see him as a boy, the differences between the two of you are insurmountable. I'm not too bothered about age differences in general - I went out with a 19 year old when I was 27, but he was astonishingly mature - more so than many men my age, and there was no way he could have been considered a boy.

- Response by loulou444, An Alternative Girl, Female, 36-45, Financial / Banking

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While I understand it's legally acceptable, I wonder about the 34 year old woman that evidently doesn't have enough children of her own to raise. (And no, that's not my "outside" voice, and I'm not trying to be mean). I'm just wondering what the attraction is.

- Response by tortureu2, A Thinker, Female, 36-45, Other Profession

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yes it sure is. as long as its consented to by both parties.

- Response by givemeatry99, A Mr. Married Guy, Male, 36-45, Philadelphia, Science / Engineering

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okay, I have heard this a million times over and heres what I think...age is a state of mind, however, when you are dating things become different. You are at different points in your life at 19 then you are at 34, Some people can be mature enough for it to work out. Im not quite sure if its "acceptable" or not, that all depends someones culture and background. I do know that its something I would never do.

- Response by carolin3lov3, An Alternative Girl, Female, 22-25, Student

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Acceptable yes will it work is another story, it is a big age difference :/

Lady W*

- Response by ladywisteria, A Sweet Sarah, Female, Who Cares?, Who Cares?

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My son? No way. But if I didn't have a personal investment, I wouldn't be bothered by it. If anything, I'd just have to wonder why she can't find someone closer to her own age. Other than sex, what could they pssibly have in common?

- Response by blueyedame, A Creative, Female, 46-55, Indianapolis, Who Cares?

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I personally, can't see myself in this situation. But, anything's possible. It might not be acceptable to everyone. However, as long as it's legal, and the two people involved are mature enough to deal with any obstacles and enjoy their compatibility in other areas. It really isn't anyone else's business or right to judge what two people choose to do. It doesn't matter what age they are or the differences! There are couples who are in the same age range all over the place. This fact alone doesn't assure success, or any bring about any more problems with a lack of compatibility that might come about. Nor, does it affect their ability to endure them. IMO

- Response by thelovedovefor1, A Creative, Female, 46-55, Atlanta, Who Cares?

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It sounds as though she might just outdate him by a few years!

- Response by joat, An Intellectual Guy, Male, 66 or older, Retired

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It's not acceptable for ME personally but who am I to accept or not accept what others do with their own personal lives. It's really none of my business.

- Response by floridagirl, An Alternative Girl, Female, 36-45, Other Profession

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so long as it isn't MY 19 year old son.

I cannot imagine what they would have in common. 19 is still a "teen" no matter what the law says. At least wait til he is in his 20's.

- Response by scooper, A Sportif, Female, 46-55, Dallas, Who Cares?

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Why not? Men have been doing the same thing for decades and it's deemed perfectly acceptable. Do what makes you happy; don't worry about what people think. Enjoy yourself!!

- Response by ygstarr, A Thinker, Female, 36-45, New York

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Uh, NO.

- Response by dewey1978, A Life of the Party, Female, 29-35, Other Profession

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is that worse than a 40 year old woman dating a 22 your old guy??? ooops thats me....

- Response by coco, A Hippie Chick, Female, 46-55, Charlotte, Technical

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no

- Response by busyb704, A Thinker, Female, 46-55, Other Profession

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sure thing as long as he's manly looking

- Response by denna70, A Life of the Party, Female, 36-45, Los Angeles, Retail

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Although we don't have control over what age a person we are attracted to is,we do have control over making wise decisions regarding dating ppl just too young to consider a relationship with.I would be a social friend w/that person keeping sex totally out of the picture.If it was meant to be,then time is what should be taken.Realistically they are still kids!

- Response by married, A Married Girl, Female, 46-55, Teaching

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Unacceptable.They will have generation gap.

- Response by annabella222, A Sweet Sarah, Female, 26-28

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It's not acceptable for me because I think that a 19 year old would be too 'young' for me and we wouldn't really have anything but sex in common...I have nephews this age and all I would ever feel, or have ever felt, for their friends was a 'motherly' type of relationship and couldn't ever see me dating one of them because I consider us to be too many years apart...but that's just my choice, I'm sure if the woman feels there is enough to make a relationship, then it's her choice to continue it or not...:D

- Response by fastball, A Cool Mom, Female, 36-45, Edmonton, Self-Employed

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Why not? I know that sounds terrible, but it happened with me, and it really wasn't a big deal. I wish when we broke up, we broke up on better terms but, I was also dealing with a guy that was still a teenager (19), and at the time, I was 31. His parents didn't have an issue with it, which I thought they would b/c I had my son back then, and he was only 4 years old! Their son was walking into a huge responsibility, and he kind of cracked under the pressure, and ended up leaving, but then, I got back together with an ex-bf, which turned out to be perfect timing, at that time. lol

- Response by suzyscorp, A Career Woman, Female, 46-55, Who Cares?

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Acceptable to who? Really. Who gives a crap?

That's nobody's business but yours and his, unless of course one of you is intimately involved with someone else. That aside...

Have fun. Just be aware that it may not be a long term deal.

- Response by crosseagle72, A Guy Critical, Male, 36-45, Who Cares?

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Hell no! She should be ashamed of herself.

- Response by girlnluv09, A Married Girl, Female, 29-35, Medical / Dental

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i say it's not really our business. If these two love each other leave them alone.... it's them who has to put up with it not you or any other person. Things will work out the way they are supposed to. If it's not meant to be it will end but in the mean time let them be. Who knows it could be true love.

- Response by A Sweet Sarah, Female, Who Cares?, Student

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No I don't.

- Response by A Sweet Sarah, Female, Who Cares?

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Well the fact that she addresses him as a 19 year old "boy" and not as a 19 year old "man". Raises an eyebrow for me. I would have a problem with the two dating not due to his age, but because of her level of respect for him.

- Response by 1man4commonsense, A Career Man, Male, 36-45, Who Cares?

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So a 19 year old is old enough to die for his country but he must still be called a boy. Thats sweet of you.

To answer your question nothing is wrong with it now, however things are going to start to sag and smell funny in a few years. Then he'll have a decision to make.

- Response by drallig9399, A Hip Hop Guy, Male, 29-35, Dallas, Military

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Date, yes. As far as marriage or even being in love, there's too much difference in mindsets to make that work. If either of you thinks it is love, I think it's infatuation.

- Response by cottontown, A Mr. Nice Guy, Male, 56-65, Self-Employed

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no im sry but its a little to much of a age difrence and the parints of the boy would hate you forever...

- Response by A Life of the Party, Female, 18-21, Student

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Not if you call him a "boy"!

- Response by surovcak, A Creative, Female, 22-25, Houston, Who Cares?

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If I were the mother of a 19 year old son I wouldn't like it one bit and would be inclined to have a little talk with this 34 year old woman and advise her to leave my son alone or else. At 34 I don't really think I would have dated someone that young...at that time in my life I was interested in men older than I was.

- Response by cocoacurevelous, A Hip Hop Girl, Female, 46-55, Administrative

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Do you think it's acceptable for a 34 year old man to date a 19 year old girl?



- Response by A Creative, Male, 29-35, Johannesburg, Internet / New Media

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As long as he is 18 it is legal for them to play

- Response by bigcurt, A Mr. Nice Guy, Male, 56-65, Pittsburgh, Self-Employed

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..I don't know what she would see in him..but..he will eventually get bored w/her when he sees her crows-feet starting to come in..

- Response by michellekia, A Thinker, Female, 36-45, St.Louis, Other Profession

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Nope, I don't, because 19 is still really young. I don't see a problem later on with it, say 25 & 40 or 30 & 45. I still wouldn't ever go there, but to each his own...

- Response by kira85, A Sweet Sarah, Female, 29-35, Dallas, Financial / Banking

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What I find funny is if it was a 34 yr old man dating a 19 yr old girl the answers would be completly different.

- Response by A Player, Male, 36-45, Who Cares?

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Feeling a little threatened that older woman are dating younger men? Women like you grow up into women who find it unnacceptable for older men to date younger women. The issue here is you not liking competition.

- Response by bailarenfuego, A Guy Critical, Male, 46-55, Technical

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i have no idea what they would have in common. but i guess maybe it can work if hes a mature 19 year old or maybe shes a immature 34 year old.

- Response by diamondgirl1018, A Trendsetter, Female, 29-35, New York, Self-Employed

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Age is just a number. The only question to that relationship is: Are they happy? If so it is acceptable - who are we to judge anyway?

- Response by derrick229, A Mr. Nice Guy, Male, 46-55, Construction

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Acceptable to whom? The couple in question? Obviously they think that it is okay. Though the age gap is certainly unconventional, I wish to suggest that it is no one else's business but their own.

- Response by gilpill, An Intellectual Guy, Male, 46-55, Chicago, Internet / New Media

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It depends on what she wants out of it. I highly doubt he sees her as longterm material. And she shouldn't see him that way either. He is a teenager. She's in her mid 30s. Probably not a good match. This could at best be an FWB situation for a while. I mean I know there are exceptions, but they are far and few in between.

- Response by silver75, A Thinker, Female, 36-45, Stockholm, Other Profession

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If the sex is good, which is usually is with a 34 year old...

- Response by lmarks, A Life of the Party, Male, 29-35, Los Angeles, Who Cares?

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OKay after reading all of everyones opinions my Feelings for this women make me very happy. SHe has two kids divorced but we do like eachother a lot. we both work full time. and its great when i come home after work get a shower and visit her all night. were trying to see where things lead and so far its been great the kids like me and her family likes me. and now the hard part... my dad knows and his out look was if a 40yr old man can marry a 18 year old female then a 19yr old male can date a 35 yr old woman. i like this girl a lot she likes me too. And the Sex is Deffinatly GREAT.

- Response by A Jock, Male, 22-25, Pittsburgh, Construction

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i have the same question. i am a 33 year old year old woman and have recently started to date a few young men (19, 20 and 22). so far we are just dating and having a good time. the attraction is their carefree desire to live life and have fun. you only live once, right? i'm very young at heart myself and want to enjoy as much as i can, while i still can. i missed out on a lot in my younger days, trapped in a physically abusive marriage. each of them are perfectly fine with the age difference.
that being said, at the same time, i am being perused by a 51 year old man. he doesn't think i should be dating "boys."

so which one is okay? what is more acceptable? a woman dating a man 10+ years younger, or a man dating a woman young enough to be his daughter?

- Response by An Alternative Girl, Female, 36-45

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