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Why would someone call, ask you out on a date and then stand you up? I don't understand.
Dating / 1:46 AM - Sunday January 11, 2009

Why would someone call, ask you out on a date and then stand you up? I don't understand.

We used to be co-workers (he's a fairly new employee) and on my final day of work I told him it'd be nice to go out sometime if he'd like to. We exchanged numbers and he called the next day. I missed his call and his message said he was calling to see if I'd like to get together the following week. I phoned back and he invited me out for tonight and said he'd call in the interim with details. He never called and I texted him to see if we were still on tonight and he didn't reply. I guess I don't understand why someone would go through the trouble of calling and partially setting something up and then not follow through when he would have never seen me again to begin with and could have easily said no and tossed my number, let alone call for a date. In the time I got to know him, this does not seem typical. He's very polite and courteous and straight forward. I'm very disappointed and quite confused. I'm wondering how other's deal with this?

- Asked by skiddlywinks, A Career Woman, Female, 29-35, Norfolk

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Once he never called, that was your cue that there was no date in the works. You texted to follow up, but that was a mistake. He had already cancelled when he failed to follow up with the call.

But see, this is a perfect example of why women should not chase after men. If he were interested in you, he would have been the one asking for your number and suggesting you two get together. He didn't do that though, which means he was not interested in you. His subsequent behavior demonstrated that.

No need to be disappointed and confused. It just wasn't mean to be in the first place.



- Response by msheartbeat, A Trendsetter, Female, 46-55, San Francisco, Self-Employed

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Because they don't like you.

Move on and never speak to them again.

- Response by lasikplus, A Thinker, Male, 46-55, Boston, Science / Engineering

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Community Rating: Community Star

Maybe something has come up and his phone went dead. Don't get upset until you KNOW what has happened. Wouldn't you feel horrible if he was in a car accident or something and all you could think about was why hasn't he called. Be patient, let him call you just don't play games when he does "just to let him know how it feels". Be mature about the situation.

- Response by unbrokenfrog, A Thinker, Female, 36-45, Home Maker

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That sucks, next time don't agree to go out the same day. It makes them think that you don't have a life. Say that you have plans for that day but give them another day when you can go out. I don't know what happened with this guy but it was messed up what he did, lose his number, someone better will come along.

- Response by A Thinker, Female, 36-45, Los Angeles, Other Profession

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