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It always feels like my boyfriend picks his guy friend over me!
Dating / 2:40 AM - Wednesday December 10, 2008

It always feels like my boyfriend picks his guy friend over me!

I'm such a jealous person, and lately my boyfriend has been hanging out with his guy friend that he's been friends with for about 10+ years, I'm getting super angry and its making me not like his friend just because im jealous of the time he spends with him. I know my boyfriend cares about me, and I have talked it over with him, but he still puts him above me. Do any of you ladies feel like you're s/o puts their guy friends first?

Update: December 29, 2008.
So what what ended up happening with you and your bf? I broke up with mine for about a week, and he's made some huge changes, so we got back together, I'm just kinda waiting to see if he will go back to his old ways

- Asked by surgarandspice1, A Trendsetter, Female, 29-35

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i have been in this position before ..if you want to stay with him try not to become a really jealous person, just like girls need that one girlfriend a guy does too ... you should be happy its not with another girl .. guys get turned off when their woman is jealous over a friend.. try to get over it and do things to keep yourself busy or hang out with other people also. try to occupy yourself. it helped me. me and my bf have been going on almost 4 years . so i hope my advice helps you out

- Response by xxxtimmzxxx, A Thinker, Female, 26-28, Boston, Student

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Maybe his friends are more fun than you......If I have more fun with my girlfriends than with my bf, then I would definitely choose girlfriends over my bf.

Think Logic.

- Response by A Career Woman, Female, 36-45, Other Profession

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Seeing as you said you were a jealous person then I am going to assume that you are not looking at this situation rationally. More then likely he is not spending any more time with this friend then he has in the past it just seems this way because you want ALL of his attention.

My suggestion GET A LIFE! Many women do this when they enter a relationship, they make their bf the center of attention and neglect the life they had before him. Well men don't operate this way. They seem to be able to balance things a little better then women and they understand that balance is key in any relationship.

Maybe he feels like you are too needy and thus spending more time with his friend hoping you would do the same with your friends. Basically he needs a little space. Who knows seeing as we don't know the background here i.e. how long you have been dating, if this is a new things, etc.

In any case if he doesn't want to spend any quality time with you and would rather be with his friend then sorry to tell you but your not the one, or your not a priority to him. If this is the case then you may want to think about moving on!

- Response by kdtxchic30, A Thinker, Female, 36-45, Who Cares?

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i have the same problem as well..but at times i ask myself if it is because of jealousy or if he really puts his friends
first..but i do understand that he needs time with the guys u got to understand that too as much as he needs tym with yaa

- Response by ladyt, A Thinker, Female, 29-35, Student

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well, honestly his friend was their first..and they have known each other longer..he needs his friend time..could you just hang out with the both of them together,maybe you'll end up being friends too. you never know

- Response by dragonflyfairie, A Hippie Chick, Female, 29-35, Teaching

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Guys have a saying.....rather crudely stated....but true nonetheless..."bro's before ho's". It has to do with the male psyche. Give him his space...he is still yours.

- Response by hu32700, A Rebel, Male, Who Cares?, Self-Employed

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yes i have been in the same situation. he seems a little insensitive to your feelings if he hasnt changed. i would ignore him for a while maybe this will be a wake up call for him.

- Response by cashbanks, A Creative, Female, 26-28, Houston, Student

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my bf is the same...we ave been going outfor 2 years now...although we are in a long distance relationship..he lives like 4 hours away frm me....but we both ave worked really hard to get this far........but the problem is ..he is always with his freinds and if i call him.....( phone is the only source, as we get to see other only 2 or 3 times a month...) he freinds tell him that i am being too obseesive and i dont trust him enough coz m always calling....but i do trust him..just call him ..coz i miss him....

- Response by A Thinker, Female, 26-28

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When it comes too my boyfriend I'm pretty Jealous too. Annnd that is the exact Reason me and my boyfriend are not together Right now, I Love him So much, And I will do anything for him i think about him all the time, Buuut! Then i think about how he is, It's like his friends are his everything, It makes me really mad, I dont think he'll change so i dont think we'll get back together. This is an old question so What happened too yall? lol.

- Response by A Thinker, Female, 22-25

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I know just how you feel. theres an old friend of my boyfriends that keeps saying hes on vacation so hes been at our house everyday. i dont get to hang out with my boyfriend like i used to its annoying. im a private person i feel as if his friend is a intruder. he even takes showers and leaves nasty dirt in it. like i think i saw pieces of skin with the dirt. he always shows up at our house at all the wrong hours to like im working all the time and very tired i have to get up at all hours of the night and breastfeed my baby and when he finally goes back to sleep this friend pulls up early in the morning or late at night and makes the dogs bark at wakes my baby up. he eats my food that i buy hes not mean to me but just very annoying. he'll try and make up for the food he ate out of or fridgerator and buys pizza nice but im already in bed by the time it comes and they eat it all so kinda unfair. all this mess makes me want to just quit my job get really good sleep for two weeks and feel better and good enough and then call off our 8 year relationship and move the baby we had together and i out into an apartment. and to top it all off when his friend is gone its his parents over hear at the house there partiers and drink tons of beer and his mom is always emotional and drunk. there alcoholics all in all i just feel like im in a horrible
situation. and the only reason i feel im with my boyfriend is becuase of our old memories that made me love him. but now we have no time to make new memories and its like were growing apart.

- Response by kerea, A Hippie Chick, Female, 22-25, Artist / Musician / Writer

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