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Empty Nest
Empty Nest / Family & Parenting / 10:33 PM - Tuesday May 13, 2008
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A Thinker (Female, 29-35, Administrative) asked:


My father-in-law asked my husband and I (along with our daughter) to move in with him after my mother-in-law passed away. His home is quite large and we would occupy the lower half while he has the upper half, but we would all have our meals together. He needs help to maintain the house due to it's size, so we were more than happy to accept his request with the understanding that we would contribute our share for the bills.

It his his house, so we will treat it as such. My question to you all is what is the proper etiquette when you live with someone else? I think the world of his father and don't want to step on his toes, but I do want to have my own "space" as well. Have any of you had a similar experience and how did you manage it?


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A Thinker (Female, 56-65, Financial / Banking) answered:

Screenname: isthistrue


Actually I think a written agreement is the best. This way you will know what your father-in-law expects. Just remember that anytime 2 families live together there will be some bumps in the road. Depending on the people, some will be small like ant hills and others will be like mountains. The same in a marriage though.

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A Thinker (Female, 46-55, Consulting) answered:

Screenname: trekker2


Yes -- and you talk with your husband about what rules you need to protect each persons privacy.
What you need as a woman to have privacy ( men tend to not understand these things) and make sure your husband does and YOU do not ignore that this issue is a real issue
what chores are to be done by whom
Think this thru carefully -- because there is no going back -- no do overs -- those are called fights

So protect each others privacy and repect each other.

good luck

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A Father Figure (Male, 66 or older, Retired) answered:

Screenname: dmncowboy


as a father with a daughter living in my house i figure the area you live in is yours and he has little say about it however dont interfeer with his area also but be available to help if he neads it an dmake the offer as he is lonley

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A Player (Female, 22-25, Who Cares?) answered:

Screenname: armybrat1


i think your thinking about it to much. you should just go with the flow of things. i am sure he wont be in your area all the time you know. just need to let the cards fold where they will.

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