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Uncensored Responses

Emotionally Unavailable
Emotionally Unavailable / Dating / 11:34 AM - Wednesday April 25, 2007
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A Sweet Sarah (Female, New Orleans, 29-35) asked:


Do you think that emotionally unavailable really just equals he/she is just not that into you?




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A Thinker (Female, Who Cares?, Who Cares?) answered:

Screenname: sakura1


YES. Absolutely any excuse whatsoever for a man not to pursue a relationship is code for "he's not that into you/he doesn't see a future with you." Period. End of story, finito.

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A Thinker (Female, Boston, Who Cares?, Administrative) answered:

Screenname: piscesrising


Usually, yes...but not always. Some men (and women, too) really just are emotionally unavailable. To everyone. It can be something that has nothing to do with you. Some people have attachment disorders or other issues that prevent them from being truly close to anyone, even if they really want to be close. In order for the relationship to thrive, he or she will need to get help with that.

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A Guy Critical (Male, Dublin, 36-45, Other Profession) answered:

Screenname: vapo


Yup!

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A Cool Mom (Female, 26-28, Alternative Medicine) answered:

Screenname: luckyinkentucky


yes.

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A Creative (Male, New York, 26-28, Internet / New Media) answered:

Screenname: tonyletigre


i think it depends... if the person is emotionally unavailable because of an emotional scar from an ex, then it takes time to heal.

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A Cool Mom (Female, Boston, 26-28, Self-Employed) answered:

Screenname: p0pc0rn


Yes.That is indeed sugar coat for they aren't that into you.

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A Father Figure (Male, Ottawa, 36-45, Who Cares?) answered:

Screenname: falconf1


Yes, that is what it means. Only a few men really cannot share their emotions even when they are into the relationship. 99% of the time it means he is not in love.

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A Life of the Party (Female, Rochester, 36-45, Student) answered:

Screenname: nottshort


Yes

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A Mr. Nice Guy (Male, San Francisco, 36-45, Who Cares?) answered:

Screenname: montezillo


It depends.

A person is defintiely emotionally unavailable if many or all of the following apply to them:

(a) they are not close to siblings who are within two years apart in age, even though they were raised in the same household;
(b) they maintain no childhood friends from juinor high, high school or college;
(c) they don't have or can't maintain best friends;
(d) they keep friends at an arms length all the time.

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