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Why do married men flirt with ...
3:06 PM - Monday August 05, 2002

Why do married men flirt with single women, particularly those who do not flirt with them or encoura

Why do married men flirt with single women, particularly those who do not flirt with them or encourage it?

- Asked by A Hip Hop Girl, Female, 29-35, Consulting

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Dear UrbanGirl; The married men that do flirt with single women do so for a variety of reasons: Some are bored, and looking for a little 'harmless' excitment; (Harmless is a relative term here; they can always convince themselves they aren't serious if the woman responds in a positive way) Some may genuinely be looking for an opportunity to cheat on their spouses, but would deny it if cornered. Others, more secure in their relationships (and a steady relationship does give a man a huge measure of self-confidence) probably see it as a way to start and carry on a conversation with a good-looking lady with little fear of rejection. I'm sure that from your perspective this is somewhat annoying, and might be perceived as borderline 'cheating'; of the men who do it though, most have no intention of cheating on their spouses; they merely do it because they can get away with it. I hope that helps. Kind Regards, --Malachi


- Response by malachi, An Engaged Guy, Male, 36-45, San Diego

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because it is exciting.....the whole premise of secrecy and getting into something that makes one feel good inside, but moreso feeling wanted and needed by someone other than your spouse>>>>>>>>>>from a married woman who flirts with both single and married men..............

- Response by flirtgirl, A Married Girl, Female, 46-55, Home Maker

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I'm with Hip Hop Girl on this but with just plain flirting...
Makes me feel hurt and that I'm no longer desirabil to my husband, It makes me feel that maybe he'd rather be single again. I don't think guy's realize how badly they tear out heart a part and hurt us wives when they flirt. It truely makes me feel I'm not worthy of being loved! It may improve a guy's self esteem and in doing so, tears our self esteem out of our soul and makes us feel like nothing anymore!
Is it really worth the flirting?

- Response by A Married Girl, Female, 46-55, Home Maker

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Men usually realize that their life is officially over once they get married, so they need to get the flirting out of their system. Flirting with a woman who doesn't repond well to it is a man's way of getting the flirting out of his system, without the worry of being tempted. Either that, or men just like a challenge! -SHOOTME


- Response by shootme, A Life of the Party, Male, 22-25, New York

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Some and not all married men do flirt with single women basically to see if the 'still have it'. It's just an ego thing. No different than a married woman letting someone flirt with them a little too much and brushing it off if her husband questions it.


- Response by dave59, An Intellectual Guy, Male, 26-28, New York, Financial / Banking

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For the same reason married women flirt with single men - it's nice to know you've still 'got it'. Married flirting isn't just a guy thing, you know. It's really that simple, I think. Hope this helps :) Ron


- Response by ron84, A Career Man, Male, 36-45, New York, Internet / New Media

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i think its to see if we are still atractive to the oppesirte sex just to feel good about our selves, dont take it the wrong way. Thanks


- Response by cobra200a, A Mr. Nice Guy, Male, 26-28, Minneapolis, Financial / Banking

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Maybe they do it for the challenge? Maybe some guys even feel that it is safe to flirt with an uninterested woman because they will never call his bluff and flirt back. I do not have the answer to this. I myself would only flirt if it was encouraged and/or returned.


- Response by mshoes, An Intellectual Guy, Male, 36-45, New York, Technical

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Some and not all married men do flirt with single women basically to see if the 'still have it'. It's just an ego thing. No different than a married woman letting someone flirt with them a little too much and brushing it off if her husband questions it.


- Response by dave59, An Intellectual Guy, Male, 26-28, New York, Financial / Banking

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