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Why do we as women want to sleep with married men
Married Life / 12:08 PM - Tuesday January 30, 2007

Why do we as women want to sleep with married men

Why are we as women so eager to sleep with a man even when we know that he's married?

- Asked by nelly350, A Thinker, Female, 46-55, Home Maker

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I actually take offense to this question. Not all women are eager to sleep with a married man. Trust me, I've had the opportunity to, and I've declined. What kind of woman would that make me? No, I think most of us have more respect for ourselves and more self control than to take another woman's man. Just because we can doesn't make it right.

- Response by befuddled, A Thinker, Female, 36-45, Who Cares?

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Not all women think like you do. The only married man I sleep with happens to be married to me. Rosey

- Response by roseytalks, A Thinker, Female, Who Cares?, Tampa, Who Cares?

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Community Rating: Community Star

Although I am a woman, I am not included in your 'we' part because I don't believe in being with someone who is already with someone else, whether they are married or not...I simply don't believe that there is such a shortage of men that I would have to stoop to taking someone else's...:)

- Response by fastball, A Cool Mom, Female, 36-45, Edmonton, Self-Employed

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I personally would never sleep with a married man. I won't even go near a guy dating another woman, but if I had to hazard to guess, I would assume either they are afraid of committment, or don't have enough respect for themselves to think they deserve anything better then a known cheat. Some women like to feel hurt. They don't know what it's like to feel good in a relationship so it's easier to date men who will hurt them. I've also heard women say they know a man is good because he's already committed to someone else, or because someone else wants him. That's hogwash. If anything that is proof he is not good, and the wife has trusted someone who doesn't deserve her trust.

- Response by A Thinker, Female, 36-45, Self-Employed

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because we married men are the best lovers. Think about it. Two women have the same complaint with their hubbies, he drinks too much or whatever. One man is a fantastic lay, the other is lousy in the sack. You tell me which man gets divorced and which one's wife decides she can live with it.

- Response by hubbyochris, A Life of the Party, Male, 46-55, Cleveland, Executive

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Not me
That would be the turn off switch

- Response by seasons4, A Sportif, Female, 46-55, Financial / Banking

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Sorry, I'm not one of those women.

- Response by rexy67, A Sweet Sarah, Female, 46-55, Who Cares?

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WTF ... Hell no.

If a married man dares to even try something on me I would punch him out ... for his lack of respect for me and his wife.

- Response by sweetfrench, An Alternative Girl, Female, 66 or older, Who Cares?

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I just can't imagine doing this. I don't even see how a woman rationalizes this in her brain. You "know" there's a wife out there. I never liked leftovers anyway.

- Response by southernpeach, A Creative, Female, 46-55, Other Profession

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I really don't think most women want to that. If they do it's a surprise to me. I know I don't.

- Response by beanielou, A Thinker, Female, 29-35, Who Cares?

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you know this is sad but alot of women are lonely they have low self esteem and they feel even though they know the man is married it is better than nothing and the sad part of that situation is you cant get the married man when you need him only to tell you the truth when it is convenient for the man when are we as women gonna stand up and put our foot down and realize there are a bigger issue here involved the married man is never gonna leave their wife oh yeah they will keep giving you that bull but they wont and lets say they really do leave the wife then guess what what he has done to her he will start doing to you because men like that they wont change and sisters out there they never will if we keep being a door mat for them take it from me i have been there done that and is so too through with that lol

- Response by A Thinker, Female, 36-45, Medical / Dental

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Only desperate women do such things. A woman that valued her body, heart, mind and spirit would also value the institution of marriage and not involve herself in such a union.

- Response by msheartbeat, A Trendsetter, Female, 46-55, San Francisco, Self-Employed

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Well excuse me but speak for yourself. I sure as hell am not such a callous hoe!

- Response by lovable077, A Thinker, Female, 29-35, Who Cares?

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SOOOOOO many self-righteous people on this site.


To answer your question, I think we love attention. Men need to feel like MEN and women need to feel sexy and beautiful.

When a man is willing to risk his marriage because he is SO attracted to you, it's the ultimate feeling of SEXY AND BEAUTIFUL. Unfortunately, most of us believe that it's enough to make him leave.Of course, that's hardly ever the case.

- Response by floridagirl, An Alternative Girl, Female, 36-45, Other Profession

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We? Sorry but don't include me in that "we"! When I find out a man is married a little note gets written in the notebook I keep in my mind. The note says something like "mike-married-off limits". I'm not into being used, pissing off another woman over a "man". (he's not a man if he's married and hitting on other women) You didn't say the guy was hitting on "us" though. You just said that "we" were eager to sleep with him. I'm not eager to sleep with any guy who's married to someone else!! That's just wrong!

- Response by itsonlyanumber, A Cool Mom, Female, 46-55, Home Maker

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sometimes they get bored with their own men,and then somethink catches their eye about this man,but at the end of the day everyone does get caught out,and its just not worth it we should all be happy with the man we have if your happy then move on and find someone firstly that aint married

- Response by estheredmunds67, An Engaged Girl, Female, 36-45, London, Other Profession

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pffft - speak for yourself!!!!!!!!!

:o(

- Response by anonymouse32, An Alternative Girl, Female, 18-21

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Eager to do it, no: I can't be eager to sleep with married men because if I was, I would have done and I never have. That said, I have sometimes wanted to, but that's in cases where I've found myself falling for the man before finding out he was married. Would I resist if such a man approached me? I don't know: they never have and once I realise they're taken, I make sure to keep my feelings to myself.

- Response by An Alternative Girl, Female, 29-35, London, Internet / New Media

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Umm... please rephrase the question "Why am I as a woman"...... I've never felt the slightest desire to sleep with a married man. It's simply unthinkable.

- Response by utahbabe, A Sweet Sarah, Female, 26-28, Philadelphia, Student

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its a get even game-
somewhere the woman must have been hurt-
otherwise a woman would not go after a married man-remember what comes around goes around

- Response by blondiee, A Life of the Party, Female, 46-55, New York, Political / Government

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well i think the thought process behind sleeping with a married man is this.sleeping with a married man gives u no commitment and i think women that do this don't want committment and thats why they do it.also i think that some women do it because they think somewhere in there mind that if they do he may leave his wife for her but it's usually not the case.

- Response by phenomenal1woman, A Thinker, Female, 46-55, Chicago

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I have NEVER been eager to sleep with a married man. Taken men are not attractive. I am only interested in the number one slot, don't do second well at all.

- Response by kayinar, A Thinker, Female, 36-45, Who Cares?

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not all are. i call it ethics...



- Response by luckycowgirl, A Player, Female, Who Cares?, Celebrity

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Since when do women make sense and think logically? This is a perfect example of women not making sense. Logic says she should get with the nice guy who treats her like a queen but does that happen? No.

- Response by buffs94, A Creative, Male, 36-45, Denver

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I don't know how many times I keep seeing these questions and, no matter how many someone ask it, it is not going to be ok to sleep with a married man or woman. The next question people ask is when I am going to meet someone, I have been single for so long.
Stats show that there are millions of singles out there so, instead of going after married people go after the other single people.
Don't included all women or men. Speak for yourself and, don't generalize. It is not ok to cheat whether the person is married or in a committed relationship. People need to have respect for themselves and, for other people.
Not only those two people get hurt if there are children they get hurt too. I saw it happen to my friend and, going on to 6 years it still affects all of them. Her son is 15 and he does not want anything to do with his father even though she encourages him to talk to him or go visit. He is still upset. She tells him it is between her and his dad but, he wants nothing to do with his dad. The daughter sees the father but, as my friend says she takes advantage of the father because, she knows he will buy her everything she wants just to spend time with her. She doesn't want her daughter to use people like that. So they have all lost out and still are. The pain goes on. People need to think of what they are doing. I have never and, would never go near a married person.

- Response by maggie1212, A Sweet Sarah, Female, Who Cares?

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Not all of us will. I would not, ever. I respect marriage and have no intention of either screwing up someone's marriage/family or letting a man sleep with me while I KNOW he's sleeping with another woman(his wife) and probably others. Plus I can be pretty certain if he will cheat on his wife he will cheat on me too. Why would you even do that to yourself?

- Response by watbuttondoipush, An Alternative Girl, Female, 36-45, Financial / Banking

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i have NEVER nor would i EVER sleep with a married man.There's more single men out there. I dont mean to be rude but it's women like you that make women like me look bad. Maybe you find it safer to sleep with a married man but there's alot of single men out there, you should give them a chance.

- Response by ksalas318, A Married Girl, Female, 36-45, Managerial

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I'm married ,and I agree that it is basic female psychology. Single women want our good men because they see how special we married women feel (most of us). Most of the women that sleep with married men have low self esteem. They are not to be trusted, not even as friends if you're married.

- Response by epatin77, A Thinker, Female, 36-45, Who Cares?

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For those who feel the condemnation for sleeping with a married man is self-riches- what's wrong with you ??? Sleeping with a married man causes pain, why is that ok with you. Most of the time this pain affects an innocent woman who is just trying to get on with her life without interference from someone who knows she is hurting and stealing from her and just does not care. We would not praise or accept it if the 'other woman' gave a drunk her car keys and let him drive his kids around or if she gave him her belt to hit his kids with. So why is it ok for a woman to offer herself and risk wrecking the lives of innocent people -so often young children included.

- Response by kymworthit, A Married Girl, Female, 46-55, Melbourne

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Interesting, as I read the responses my only thought is "my we doth protest too much!!!" Most women would not sleep with married men, but clearly some do and some married women cheat on their spouses, while others don't. I don't consider married men, or men who are in relationships as available but for other women clearly this is not a barrier. I am guessing that some do it for love, some for the thrill, some for the lack of commitment.
I think the real question should be, why do married men sleep with women who are not their wives.... Hmmmmm :)

- Response by A Thinker, Female, 46-55, Science / Engineering

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Please don't include *me* in your *we*....I don't want to sleep with married men. :P

- Response by mominmi, A Career Woman, Female, 36-45

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Women tend to want the other woman's man, more so than single men. The other woman's man has a "female approved" stamp of approval. A single man is suspect because he doesn't have a g/f already. Its basic female psychology.

- Response by greenwind, An Intellectual Guy, Male, 56-65, Construction

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good question i have not found myself attracted to a married man, i think its sexy and attractive when a gorgeous man is married and he treats his wife with respect!
but i dont want to steal somebodys husband even if it is just one night.
could i just say WHAT GOES AROUND COMES AROUND!

- Response by lyndaerik, A Thinker, Female, 29-35, Los Angeles, Teaching

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I dont know that I agree with that, but I would say because he makes us feel sexy, desirable...needed....i ntresting...?? Just a thought...lol

- Response by adventurine, A Cool Mom, Female, 56-65, Artist / Musician / Writer

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Some say it's because of "no committment" involved, others say it's the "rush" of doing something that we aren't supposed to do and not getting caught - but the "catching" usually happens eventually.
Why do married men want to sleep with single women and married women and post on dating sites? Just a thought here.

- Response by texas50, A Career Woman, Female, 56-65, Who Cares?

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Hi Nelly350, These women are in it for sex or money sometimes both. There is a rare breed called "The Home Wrecker".

Women sleep with the married man because they give them what they can't get at home.

- Response by tisdale, A Father Figure, Male, 46-55, Financial / Banking

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I'm not eager to sleep with a married man unless he's married to me! ;)

- Response by A Thinker, Female, 26-28, Boston, Student

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Well it is only some women, but I get your drift. There is something very sexy about a man who is taking care of his wife and children. However, I believe in Karma so I doubt I will ever go there.

- Response by A Creative, Female, 26-28, Who Cares?

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The only married man I sleep with is my husband. I've been cheated on so I don't do that to other women's feelings. I suppose the few women that do sleep with other men probably have attachment issues...they know the guy won't want to get too attached and leave his other life behind so it's "safe". Anyway that's my best bet.

- Response by tsukiko, A Creative, Female, 29-35, Pittsburgh, Technical

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Ehhhh, not me!

- Response by seductivepisces9, A Thinker, Female, 29-35, Who Cares?

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Because cheating or being a part of a cheating relationship is a human thing not a thing simply reserved for the male gender. Both parties in the cheating relationship are responsable not just the one who is married or committed, therefore women are equally culpable in almost every case. Sure sometimes the one who is ina relatinship lies but not always, so again its a human thing not a gender thing, and not all humans have impulse control.

- Response by An Intellectual Guy, Male, 36-45, Sacramento, Other Profession

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People want what they cannot have. Having said, I think I will go to Vegas, get married to some random drunk girl, and tell the hot women back home that I am married. This surely would be a good way to get action!!!!!

- Response by micro420, An Intellectual Guy, Male, 29-35, San Francisco, Technical

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I think most womna, (not me), sleep with married men, bcuase, they want the treasure without actually owning it. In other words, they don't want the commitment.

- Response by willard215, A Thinker, Female, 46-55, Home Maker

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It's the rush of sneaking around. Just like when a man steals a car or something its a rush of trying not to get caught

- Response by michelle45, A Thinker, Female, 29-35, Indianapolis, Administrative

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It is human nature to have a bit of "bad girl" in us. To do things that you might get caught, excitement....also the knowledge that you won't have to worry about a commitment because he is already married and you want to play the field. Or we are flat out bored with our lives and want to put some excitement into it. Challenges and being a bit sneaky sometimes is fun for both sexes.

- Response by irisrosesc, A Thinker, Female, 56-65, Administrative

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This question is really offensive. Who is this 'we' you talk about? I don't sleep with married men, I don't seek them out, and when I find out someone is who's been flirting with me is married I send them packing. Where did this judgy-ness spring from?

- Response by mountainchic, A Thinker, Female, 36-45, Other Profession

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Well, I put it this way, if a married person is willing to sleep with you, then why not? Obviously not all marriages are perfect, and how do you no that your man isnt out there doing just that? A lot dont no of course. No I am not saying that I have or will have slept with a married guy. Hell half of the time the ones that do sleep around on their wives are not admitting they are married and dont wear wedding rings anyways.

- Response by haley398, An Alternative Girl, Female, 46-55, Who Cares?

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reverse that queston and resubbbbb mmmmmiiit!

- Response by dvgic, A Guy Critical, Male, 46-55, Atlanta, Other Profession

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whoa i dont do those...n for the ones that do maybe bec they wanna get self confidence meanin they can get what they want idk

- Response by harmonykriketz, A Thinker, Female, 26-28, New York, Other Profession

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we do?

- Response by scooper, A Sportif, Female, 46-55, Dallas, Who Cares?

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because we know he'll get the hell out and go home.

- Response by 1materialgirl, A Career Woman, Female, 46-55, New York, Executive

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i'd do it for a good job.

- Response by A Life of the Party, Female, 36-45, Who Cares?

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I don't know anyone like that.

- Response by ebm3, A Trendsetter, Female, 36-45, Self-Employed

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Coming from a married guy i have been told by married women or single women for that matter That they "Females" likes married men becuase don't have to worry about us calling you and bothering you You can go and come as you please not worrying about the guy or what he thinks I love meeting married women for the same reason

- Response by tanaramaman1, A Mr. Married Guy, Male, 36-45, Other Profession

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There are a lot of self righteous people on here. Granted, I've slept with a few married women who, in public, were self righteous about how they would never cheat.

- Response by An Intellectual Guy, Male, 36-45

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